My Chemical Romance as Shitposts

And so the Clownery Begins

this -x- btw signals a change in post

Ray: Hey, I've never had a nightmare and kinda wanna know what it's like, can you help me out?

Gerard: Sure! See you soon

Frank: That was so fucking powerful it burnt off my eyebrows.

-x-

Kidnapper: *hits Mikey across the face* Nobody's ever gonna find you

*duolingo owl bursts through the door and shoots the kidnapper*

Mikey: Holy shit you saved me

Duolingo owl: You've got more Spanish to learn you'll die when I say you die

-x-

Ray: Sleeping is nice because it's you're not actually dead but you're not awake so it's a win-win situation

Mikey: It's like being dead without the commitment

Frank: An open relationship with death

Gerard: Death with benefits

-x-

Frank: Mimes are to clowns as dogs are to wolves

Gerard, trembling: What?

-x-

Frank: Yeah sex is cool I guess (if you're into that sort of thing) but have you ever tried blasphemy or moderate to severe heresy against the tyrant that calls himself "God"?

-x-

Gerard, as a detective: Poor bastard...looks like the perp slapped his balls clean off

Frank: How's that for a vibe check?

-x-

Mikey: Reverse shorts. Only the bottom half.

Ray: Socks

Mikey: Fuck you

-x-

Ray: You can probably tell which family member is coming up the stairs by their step pattern but you wouldn't be able to pick out your own

Frank: If my own footsteps were coming down the hall towards me we would have bigger problems

-x-

Gerard: I need some serotonin

Frank: *stands up*

Frank: *sits back down*

Frank: I didn't remember what serotonin was and I was about to go get you some

-x-

all credit goes to the original posters on tumblr and twitter