Holding Me Back

Chapter 7

Narrator's POV

Silence filled the air after Jongkook and Somin argued like little kids. Somin fiddled with her hair as Jongkook fiddled with his hands.

Only their heartbeats were to be heard and the awkward atmosphere wasn't helping either.

No one knows what to say or how to start. So, as the older person, a senior and a man, Jongkook initiated the conversation.

"So, what do you want to do now?" He asked without maintaining eye contact. "What time is it, oppa?" Somin questioned instead.

"It's about 9pm. Why?" Jongkook glanced at his phone. "Ah, really? Then I better get back home now," She stood up and awkwardly walked to the table to pack her stuff into the tote bag.

"Now?" Jongkook also stood up and walked towards her. Somin, who was rushing to get back home to avoid the awkward situation, hurriedly went to put on her shoes.

Without thinking, Jongkook stopped her actions by turning her body to face him.

"Why are you doing this? What are you rushing for?" Jongkook felt confused and annoyed by Somin's eagerness to leave.

"Oppa. I..." She trailed off her words and avoided his eyes as she tried to find an excuse.

She took a deep breath as Jongkook stood infront of her.

"I don't want us to be awkward. Can we forget about this? Okay? I don't know if I can stand this feeling forever," She finally explained as she fiddled with her bag.

"Somin-ah.." He trailed off and let out a sigh. "Okay, lets sit down and talk properly," Jongkook convinced her to sit down and pulled her arm gently.

Somin had no choice but to follow.

Somin's POV

"I know it's weird. This situation is weird. I know we could've just forget about that..kiss but it still won't be the same," Jongkook oppa said carefully.

I was in dilemma. I don't know if I could forget about the kiss. Although I'm an actress, I can't just act as if nothing had happened, especially with a close colleague. I can't pretend that I didn't feel anything.

But what about him? How does he feel? I cleared my throat and finally stared into his eyes.

"Actually..I felt something,oppa," I quietly muttered.

Jongkook's POV

What? What does she mean by that?

"What do you mean?" I frowned my eyebrows. "I can't believe this," I heard her whispered under her breath.

"Can't believe what?" I asked again. I feel irritated when someone doesn't answer my question immediately.

"I can't believe that my heart raced before we kissed, when we kissed and after we kissed. Ah, oppa. Don't you get it?" Somin replied to me with an annoyed tone.

I was shocked at Somin's boldness. What happened to the shy girl?  "So, oppa. I wanted to ask you if your heart raced," She suddenly changed her tone and attitude, looking all serious.

I gulped down my saliva. Did my heart raced? Shit. I have no idea. But why did I pulled her closer instead of pushing her away?

"Somin, are you crazy? Just because of a kiss? I admit it's my mistake but it's not like it was amazing or anything," I voiced out before I could think.

Somin's POV

Just a kiss? Who does he think he is?
My heart went sore for a moment. It felt as if something hit me right in the chest.

I don't even know if Jongkook oppa knew I was really sensitive in real life, compared to when we shoot on Running Man.

"Ah. Really? Okay," My voice cracked as I said that. It wasn't a big of a deal or anything but it felt awful to hear that.  "Somin, wait," He grabbed onto my arm. I pulled away without thinking.

He seemed startled when I pulled away. "I didn't mean to say that. I didn't meant to say it that way," He elaborated in an anxious tone.

"Fine, it didn't felt that amazing but who kissed who first? Tell me. If you hadn't kissed me, none of this would have happened. You don't even know what a girl would feel like after being kissed. You don't know how it feels to know that her kiss is not so amazing when the guy was the one who started it. Fine, it's my fault,"

I ranted out my opinion like a mad woman and without realising, a tear rolled down on my cheeks to show how frustrated I was.

Jongkook's POV

Again, I was startled to hear Somin's words. I was even more surprised when I saw tears welling up her eyes. I was disappointed. My mother told me to be a good man yet, I'm making a woman cry.

I went closer to Somin and wiped off her tears. She sobbed and it shows that she was really frustrated. I totally forgot she was sensitive too.

I embraced her in my arms to comfort her. "I'm sorry. I must be dumb," I patted on her back and felt tears on my shoulders.

"Oppa, you are dumb," She said in a croaked voice and I laughed. She really was unpredictable.

She pulled away and wiped off her tears. "I'm on my period and I'm sensitive so what you've said really made me mad," She explained casually and once again, I was shocked that she told me she was on her period.

I laughed loudly and shooked my head in disbelief.  As Somin calmed down, I thought of something. I looked at her and thought of her as a woman, not a friend.

The way I held her,cared for her and kissed her. Was it exciting? Did my heart actually raced?

"I think you'd be a good partner for me," I bravely said.