Secrets Kept - Saints & Sinners Edition (Book 1)

Preface

My past has defined who I am as a person. All that I have experienced made me a better person in every way but one. I'm angry a lot of the time and I end up getting tossed into situations where it's fight or flight.

My name is Jakoby Reign Monroe and I am what some would call a rape baby. At least that's what people call me to my face and behind my back. I hated it, so much so that I have done my best to keep that detail from coming out in any forum. 

My mother, Jacqueline Ann Monroe raised me with the help of my Uncle Eddie. It wasn't ideal, but it's what I was stuck with. My grandmother who I have never met put her out after finding out she was sixteen and pregnant with me. 

My uncle went to prison around that same time my mother was made homeless for a few years. After being released from prison, my mother found the need to rescue him once she was slightly on her feet. He actually moved in with us once we moved to this neighborhood thirteen years ago.

Before Uncle Eddie moved in, my mother ended up living with one of her friends while pregnant, Gwen Payton before getting into a fight with Gwen's dad after he tried to force himself on her while she slept. It's safe to say that Gwen chose her dad's side even after catching her father in the act.

After the incident, my mother moved here to Chicago with her favorite Aunt Mildred only to end up being homeless a second time. Aunt Mildred accused her of stealing her weed stash. How do you accuse a terrified pregnant teen of stealing your weed stash? My mother began living in the school she attended at the time. She turned seventeen during her senior year. I heard she gave birth to me under a false name and fled the hospital the same night out of fear that they would call Child Protective Services.

Her long-time friend, Rachel helped her hideout until her family finally invited her into their trailer. Still to this day, I call Rachel's mom grandmother. We may not share the same skin color but she's more of a grandmother than whomever my real one is.

Both girls started working in a diner and helped pay bills. Rachel went to college while she worked but my mother didn't for whatever reason. She hardly speaks to Rachel these days. I think she's embarrassed by her outcome but Rachel could care less because she watched how hard my mother worked to provide for me. Rachel even offered to move my mother to New York with her but my mother being the stubborn person that she is declined.

My mother went through a lot. I don't even know who my biological father is. I've always wondered who took advantage of my mother at such a young age and got her pregnant with me. She doesn't like to talk about it though. From what I know, she has never disclosed it to anyone but her brother, Eddie.

To make matters worse, we were always peeling my uncle from gambling spots after he got fired from his third job for lying on his application. He was always in over his head. I don't know why she felt so obligated to protect him. No one did, but they assumed it was deep-rooted. He used to be so fun to be around, but one day it all changed.

We lived in a small two-bedroom stucco house in the projects. It could use a pressure wash but I was grateful for a place to lay my head. My mother was never home. She would work all hours of the night leaving me alone since I was a child. There were rumors about her circling the neighborhood and getting paid for sex, but I didn't care. I also knew the rumors weren't true. She is my mother, how could I? She used to work long hours at the diner down the street until she recently became the secretary for Odin Black Enterprises. It pays a lot more than the diner, but not enough to afford a decent apartment just yet. She should receive her first raise by the end of the year.

My mother wasn't perfect but there are so many things I loved about her. She was a hard-working beautiful single woman who I honestly believed were afraid of men for obvious reasons. As far as my uncle, he creeped me out. I almost never stayed in the house with him alone. He gives off crazy vibes.

I didn't want my life to be defined by how I came about so I worked really hard in school and did my best to stay out of trouble.

It's a little hard to stay out of trouble when I live in what they call the "hood" known as Crestview. It's not the best neighborhood but when you're raised by a single parent struggling to make ends meet, there aren't many options of places to live here in Chicago. Instead of my uncle being a huge help like he was initially, he has been a burden in more ways than one.

I usually run with the same crew and keep my head down like I was taught. My best friend's Ramona and Kiki were like the exact opposites.

Ramona is a feisty firecracker who stays to herself and KiKi is loud, funny, and outgoing. Me, well I am just the goofy smart one.

We all became friends as one of us was cool with the other. I hate that I don't get to see them as often anymore because I no longer attend the same school. I was one of the lucky students who entered an essay writing contest on Global Warming when I was only in the 5th Grade. The six finalists were given the scholarship to attend Excellence Academy. When the winners were announced, I was one of the finalists along with one of my old best friends, Sonya. No one knows it, but I helped her write her last-minute essay. Apart from me feels as if she only did it because I did. I shook those thoughts off because she was my best friend or so I thought.

My mom was pissed after finding out I had entered a contest and actually won. There are some days when I thought the only reason she gave birth to me is that she couldn't afford to abort me.

I was over the moon when I found out both Sonya and I were finalists. At least I would not go to a school that was foreign to me because I would have my first best friend with me. Turns out, her family had other plans. There were many times I needed a ride to cross the bridge toward our new school but her family turned their back on me. One day I went to Sonya's house after she began ignoring my calls and I overheard her mom say "you need to stay away from Jakoby before she tarnishes your reputation. You don't want anyone associating you to the ghetto". It crushed my heart. Sonya and I had been best friends since we were in diapers. I knew all her secrets and she knew mine. I mean, yeah, I didn't dress as nice as her but I was smart and outgoing. I was never dirty or ghetto looking like her mother would say.

Ramona and Kiki tried warning me that she had been gossiping about me, but I never believed them. I guess I didn't want to. It was hard taking their word when they've hated that she was my best friend in the first place.

Ramona and Sonya were actually best friends at first and Kiki and I were friends. When the dust settled, Sonya and I became closer as Ramona and Kiki became closer.

This brings me to my current reality...