Happiness Doesn't Wait

Abi

Oh shoot. Now I really have to go shopping for new clothes.

This past week, it seemed to have grown quite a bit. About a week ago I just had a small bloated area, but now it's starting to stick out. But fortunately, we can either wear leggings or black jeans at work. So it doesn't affect my job attire. When I wear my sweaters and coats for the Winter, it's not very noticeable but when I take those off for work, people turn to see if I'm either fat or pregnant. Let's let them think I'm just fat for right now....

But I've completely lost all kinds of nausea I rarely experienced. I'm feeling much better and I'm not exhausted at all now. Which is better for me because my job requires for me to stay awake. Apart from that, I've lost some pain from my breasts that I started to get before I even knew I was pregnant. I should've caught that sign but like always, I'm so oblivious of everything.

I finally changed doctors with my sister and the last time I went for a check up, my sister fell asleep on her chair while the doctor talked to me. I think we've switched roles now.

But hunger is now my new companion. I was surprised to find out that sometimes my hunger is only because I'm thirsty. But it makes sense because I'm on my feet all day. And even though I'm feeling good, I have to show Blake that I'm doing well. I always get mad when he starts to suggest things that I can do. I've survived without him, too. He should know that.

Yet, one day I did need his help. I've been careful around him since that last time I accidentally walked in on them. I knew that those tears were angry tears as he clenched his jaw while I was talking with his mother. But one day, I was working and going along the afternoon when a small rumble reminded me that I should either drink water or get a small snack. So I decided to just drink water and go along with my customers. About an hour later, another rumble came along. This was definitely hunger.

As I walked through the kitchen, the various smells made my mouth water. I turned my eyes to one chef to give him a small nod, but the plate he was doing grabbed my attention more than his joke. I've been craving a lot of fish lately and his plate smelled like fish.

I do not know what went on in my head at that moment, but it felt like a food switch just flipped and now I was eagerly looking for a fish-like snack. Tuna or something! When I didn't find anything, I sighed in frustration and my eyes caught a sight of Blake's firm posture. Embarrassment started within me when my head was telling me to go ask him for a plate. My stomach rumbled loudly and I decided: screw the embarrassment. This is his child anyways...

I carefully went up to him after he got a waiter in trouble. I can see that he's still a little firm from that last visit he had with his mother. So I gently smiled at him when he looked at me. "Hey, chef."

"Hey," he said with a small mumble. He started to walk to the path where it leads us to his office and I followed behind.

"How's your day going?" My stomach angrily growled at me, but I mentally shushed it. I needed to see if the waters were calm.

Blake did a tired sigh and said, "It's going. How about yours?" This time he gave me a warm smile and turned back to his clipboard.

"Good also," I said. "But...I was wondering if you're busy..." Now I followed him inside his office and he quickly sat back at his desk.

I watched him rummage through a few papers with a furrowed brow. "I am a bit busy," he softly said without looking up at his paperwork.

"Oh." I immediately regretted going up to him and embarrassment took the best of me. "Um...Okay. I'm sorry. I won't bother you anymore. Is there anything I can help you with?"

"No," Blake said without looking up. "Thank you." I gave him a small nod, even though he didn't see, and I started to walk out with a hint of disappointment in my heart and stomach.