Happiness Doesn't Wait

Abi

I watch in shock at Blake numbly entering the hospital room.

I see her there. Alive. Slowly and softly breathing in the air of healing.

Even my little one seems at shock by the news as he quietly listens to it all. To the sound of the heart rate from the machine by her side. The small breaths. The people in scrubs passing by us. To the many questions my mind is screaming at.

I stand at the door frame. Blake gently sits by her side. We are both confused to everything that just happened, but something within is about to click. I'm looking...waiting for that puzzle piece to finally fall in its place.

Blake takes a tender hold of his mother's hand and waits.

She slowly opens her eyes and smiles at him. Her eyes have that shine from the first time I met her. That smile is the one of a healthy person. A cancer free patient...

"Mom?" Blake's voice is only a shaky whisper when he says this, but she can hear it. She can hear our confused and shocked hearts as she softly says to him, "I've been healed. I felt it. He healed me!"

Blake's eyes start to water and he lowers his head to sob. She quietly smiles at him as she runs her fingers through his wavy hair. "I told you, didn't I? He did not wait for you anymore. At last, He did what He had to do to reach for you."

And there it is. The click. The moment when my mind at last clears from all those foggy memories. From all the thunders of despair. I take a step back the moment my mother's sad eyes run through my mind, and my eyes start to water. I imagine my mother on that hospital bed. Helpless.

Maybe I'm the one that would be on that bed. Anyone can. I am. I'm waiting for the healing. My broken heart desperately looks for an escape from all this emptiness. All this guilt.

So my feet have a mind of its own as I start to walk through the hallways. Tears start to fall without a reason as I hear running footsteps behind me.

"Abigail!"

I turn around and see Blake stopping in front of me. I can see in his eyes those missing pieces he is trying to click together as well.

But I finally found it.

"I...." Yet, I am still left confused. I have no idea where to start so I say, "I have to go."

"Where are you going?"

"I...I'm looking for someone. I can't wait any longer."

Blake's eyes show determination as he realizes what I want to do. He comes closer to give me a long kiss and rub my belly one last time. He gives me a small smile. The smile I fell in love with as he says, "I love you. Call me when you are done."

I give him a nod and another quick kiss before I continue my path to a journey that at last I will take an end to.

I enter my car and find myself driving back to my place. Where it all began...

I enter my apartment, and see my mother and my sister at the sofa. They both have worried faces on and when they see me enter, they immediately stand.

"Abi!" Amy is the first to speak up. "How is she? Mom told me about you going to the hospital and I figured that it was Ms. Tavares."

I look at my mother without responding to my sister. My eyes start to water and I let them be as I see her eyes soften at my look. I wipe my tears and say, "She survived. And she's cancer free."

"Oh my god..." Amy says with her hand up her mouth. "I..." She looks at my mother now and does a small surprised laugh. "God is good..."

These words at last bring me to speak up. I look at my sister and softly say, "I don't believe you."