Exposed. || swritess_

Moving Forward

TW: discussing death of a family member, heavy emotional topics

Sure, you'd spoken to Leia Organa before. But not like this.

You hadn't been this nervous in a long time. Your leg was bouncing so uncontrollably the table was shaking, your lips raw and cracked from biting it over and over again.

It felt like the day of your final interview with Maz before you'd landed your job. Anxious, excited, eager, but feeling like you'd pass out at any moment. Leg bouncing like crazy as usual.

You'd met Leia before, spoke with her at length. But that was an interview. A professional conversation between a journalist and the founder of a major philanthropy. Today, this was a mother and her son's girlfriend.

You'd been seated at the restaurant for twenty minutes now since you'd arrived a good half an hour early for fear of being late. And now your punctuality had given you twenty minutes to let your thoughts spiral and ever fear you could think of surface.

Would she like me? What if she didn't want Kylo to date me? Did I wear the right outfit today? Why did she want to meet me for lunch?

Leia had asked you not to tell Kylo you were meeting her for lunch and you'd agreed, believing that she must have a good reason. Most likely, she didn't want Kylo to overthink it. Which is exactly what he would've done.

But then you started worrying, wondering if she'd instructed you to not tell Kylo because this wasn't going to end well. If maybe she was planning on sitting you down and insisting you stop seeing her son, or telling you that she didn't think you were the right person for her son.

Not that she'd given any indication that that was what she intended to do, but anxiety was a bitch that made you question everything.

You shot up out of your chair when you saw her enter the café. Leia spoke with the hostess for a moment before looking past the restaurant employee and spotting you already at the table.

This is fine. I'll be fine. Leia is super nice and this will be fine. All good, everything's good.

Wait, did I smile back at her? Or did I just stare? Oh crap, am I supposed to shake her hand or hug her or what the fuck am I supposed-

You didn't have time to keep panicking because Leia was now at the table. Actually, she was pulling you into a hug.

"Hello, dear," she chirped. "Thank you so much for meeting me."

Leia had that soothing, motherly voice that had the universal effect of calming a person down. It certainly had that effect on you and you felt some of the nerves melt away.

"Of course," you replied. "I'm glad to see you again."

Leia released you and took a seat opposite of you. She was dressed well like she was last time, her graying hair braided and pinned into a bun.

"And thank you for not telling Ben about this," she continued. "You know him. He'd freak out over nothing."

You laughed to yourself. Oh, do I ever.

"Of course," you replied. "I'm glad I get to talk to you as someone other than a nosy journalist."

"Speaking of being a thorough journalist," she said, "before I came here, Ben was telling me you gave Palpatine a run for his money."

You tried to hide your pride, but you couldn't. "A little."

"He deserves everything that comes at him," Leia said. "I was sorry to hear that he was trying to frighten you."