Mine

Chapter 9

A/N: EXTRA LONG CHAPTER
"Dr. Grey!" I say loudly down the hall.
"Oh. Dr. Shepherd, I didn't see you there." Meredith smiles walking to me.
"How is your day babe?" I ask as we walk together.
The habit of cute names was now starting and I loved it. I could tell she loved it too.
"It was okay. How about you?" She smiles.
My fingers brush hers and I feel a sudden jolt as she pulls at my fingertips.
"My day was great," I say smiling.
"Can I ask you for a favor?" She asks as we step into the elevator.
I watch the doors close and pull her waist to mine.
"Of course, what is it?" I ask curiously.
"The chief dropped a retractor in surgery today. After he dropped it, he left. Can you see if he is alright?" She asks softly as her fingers run down my sides.
"Yeah. Of course." I smile.
She tiptoes and our lips meet softly. I let my fingers run through her hair as she pulls me closer by the v-neck of my scrubs. She backs into the wall and I laugh. She giggles and pulls at my hair, massaging my scalp. I smile as the bell rings and she pulls away. We both wipe off the saliva on our lips and go in opposite directions as the door opens to the third floor. Smiling, I walk across the catwalk and look through the glass walls of the chief's office. Richard has his elbows on his knees and is massaging his temple. I knock on the door and wait patiently for him to let me inside.
"Come in." He says after a while.
"Richard. Meredith- I mean, Dr. Grey told me that you dropped a retractor in surgery today. Is everything alright?" I ask walking up to his desk.
"Alright. Shut the door." He says.
I turn around and close the door curiously.
"A few weeks ago, I was operating and the vision in my right eye became blurry. After a few hours, it was fine. It's come back again." He says as I sit in the chair opposite him.
"Did you have it checked out?" I ask worriedly.
"Examination was normal. My ophthalmologist just tells me that I'm getting older. But you know what a decline in my visual acuity can mean." He replies.
I nod and think about all the things that it could be.
"I'll set up some tests," I say getting up.
"Shep...I know how fast rumors spread. This is just between us." He says.
"Of course." I smile as I walk out of the office and shut the door.
I walk to the nurse's station and order a head CT for a John Doe. I also pick up a pile of charts and head to the nearest on-call room. As I sit on a bed, my phone vibrates angrily. I roll my eyes as I see 'ADDISON' in the middle. I try to do the charts and ignore Addisons calls as well as I can before my pager rings. I sigh happily and write the last post OP notes. I smile and hand the nurse all of the completed charts and walk into the conference room. Most interns are gathered there and I step behind Meredith. Sneakily, I press my arms against Mer's, pulling at her fingertips. Hearing her laugh, I smile as she pushes her fingers between mine. As Patricia beings to speak, I rub my thumbs over hers. Everyone was so squished together in the small room that no one noticed us smiling and holding hands.
"I have to go." I leaned forward and whispered in her ear as Richard walked into the room.
"It's okay baby." She nodded.
I squeeze her hands tight before letting go. I make sure to let go of her hands as slowly as possible, making sure that she knew I didn't want to leave. Her calling me 'baby' feels amazing. Almost like a kiss every time. I laugh silently and walked next to Richard.
"We should try and get down to the MRI now," I say.
This isn't really a good time." He says.
"If you want to do this without anybody else knowing, you should do it now," I said walking down to the MRI.
He followed me soon after and we walked to the elevator. I pressed the button and it opened immediately. My face broke out in a smile as Mer stood on the other side of the doors. She smiled wide and then dropped her expression as Richard walked in. I did the same and stood next to her.
"I heard your mother was leaving Mayo. Is she going back with the UN?" Richard asked.
My stomach twisted and I brushed my fingers against hers. She did the same and I watched her face.
"She's uh... taking some time off." She said.
Her face was etched with uncomfortableness as he spoke.
"To write another book I suppose." He cut her off.
Her fingers tensed up and I slide my hand into hers. I squeezed tightly and gave her a sympathetic look.
"Yeah." She replied.
Her fingers tightened their grip around mine and I saw a small tear run down the side of her face. All I wanted to do was to pull her in and hold her in my arms. Richard knew about Addison and he might tell Mer. It was too much of a risk. The doors opened as Meredith's hand left mine.
"I've gotta go do charts." She said softly while running a hand through her hair to hide her tear.
"Actually Meredith do you mind helping Dr. Shepherd with my case?" He asked holding the door.
"Of course Dr. Webber." She turned around and smiled.
I was so taken aback by the sudden change in her mood that I stepped against the wall of the elevator.
"Where are we heading?" She asked standing next to me.
"MRI." I smiled softly.
She nodded and hit a button. Richard told her the symptoms that he had experienced and I watched as she nodded along, saying nothing. The doors opened again and we walked to the screening room. Meredith and I stood outside the room with the MRI and watched through the glass as he laid down by himself, insisting to do so.
"Mer, are you alright?" I asked as I pulled Meredith in for a hug where no one could see us.
She buried her face in the crook of my neck and nodded.
"I'm fine. It's just that the chief was best friends with my mother all through Residency. It's hard for me to not tell him about her." She said muffled into me.
"It's okay," I said pulling her closer.
Her arms wrapped around my neck as she tiptoed. I pulled her in and held her waist and shoulder, rubbing my nose against hers.
"Thank you." She said after a while.
"Your welcome babe." I pulled away and smiled.
Her hands held my shoulders, my eyes closed and I let my lips lock with hers. Her lips tasted like vanilla causing me to be slightly turned on.
"What do you guys see?" We heard Richards voice from the speakers.
Meredith pulled away from me, leaving my lips red. I watched as she ran to the intercom and clicked the button.
"Chief, we need you to stay still." She said smiling and looking at me.
"Right. Okay." The speakers emitted his voice.
We laughed as I walked over to her.
"Do you skate?" I asked sitting in the chair.
"I did." She smiled standing behind me.
I smiled as her hands tangled in my hair, pulling gently.
"Let's go skating tomorrow night," I said trying to stay calm as she rested her chin on my head.
Her arms wrapped around my neck and she kissed my cheek.
"I have a thing with home tomorrow. They insist I go. Are you free tonight?" She asked as her arms tighten.
"Yes, I am. And, I would like to spend it with my you." I smiled as she kissed my neck.
"And I would like to spend my night with-" She stopped abruptly and stood up straight, her arms unraveling from my neck.
"What's wrong," I asked looking up to her.
"Tumor." She said softly pointing at the scans which her up.
I groaned as she sighed and sat on my lap. I smiled again and laughed as I pulled her closer.
"Shh!" She giggled.
I nodded and watched as she hit the red button. My head pressed into her back and I could feel her bra straps against my nose.
"Your done Dr. Webber. Take your time getting out." She said before pressing the red button.
She leaned back and I let my teeth pull the strap through her scrubs. She laughed, turned her head, and pushed into my face with hers.
"Stop." She giggled.
"Never." I laughed as I pull her head to mine.
I let our lips lock for a moment before letting her get up.
I held her fingertips and smiled as my phone rang. I groaned as I pulled my phone out of my pocket. I saw the word FINN in bold and shoved it into my pocket angrily.
"Who's Finn?" She asked pulling my fingertips.
"The twin that I don't talk to," I replied annoyed.
"Oh, right." She said sitting on the counter.
"What's wrong with me?" Webber asked walking in.
I immediately let Meredith's hand slip out of mine and turn to the chief. He walks closer and I point to the scans.
"Dr. Grey? Care to tell him what's wrong?" I ask.
She nods and stands in front of me, and bending to look at the scans with Richard. I smirk at her methods of teasing me that I stand next to her and let my fingers explore her sides, through the scrubs.
"It's a tumor that's pressing on your optic nerve." She says reaching for her pager.
She moves past the pager and smacks my hand away from her. I smirk as Richard looks at the scans solemnly.
"Can you get it out?" He asks.
"Oh definitely. I will probably be able to get perfect margins. There are risks, this is brain surgery we are talking about here." I say backing away from Meredith.
"Just what I need- A syphilis outbreak and a tumor." He says.
I nod and smile.
"I want only my people." He says before walking out.
I nod as he leaves and then pull Mer into an on-call room. She looks confused as I pull the door close and lock it.
"Teasing me like that... is so hot," I whisper.
"You started it, biting my bra straps." She moans as I kiss her neck.
She walks backward and sits on the bed as I get on my knees. Her arms hold my head as my mouth sucks at her. Adrenaline pumps through me, and my hands find the hem of her scrubs. I inch the scrub top off quickly as she pulls mine over my head. I relax and let my mouth play with the beautiful breasts, sucking and licking them. Her moans echo in my ears as I pick her up. She tugs at my hair as I set her on the small table in the on-call room. Her fingers find the straps of my scrub bottoms and untie them with ease, pushing my boxer briefs off in the process. I groaned as her hands grasped my member and rubbed it, up and down making it get bigger. I step out of my clothes before untying her scrub pants. I laughed as her hands pull me closer. I pull the panties off and let my hands hold her legs to my waist.
"Derek!" She moans.
I grunt as I push us both into a bed. I attack her lips while I grind against her. Her fingers tangle in my hair. We breathe heavily as I work my way down her body, turning her tips into hard knobs and leaving red marks on her body. Meredith moans quietly and holds the sheets. I smile reaching her core and lick around her bikini line, never giving her the satisfaction. My teeth pull her panties off and my hands edge them off of her legs. I moan as my hands run over her breasts while my nose brushes the skin on the inside of her thighs. I smile as I smell the arousal of her. I let a hand drift from her breast and gently massage her folds. I move back up and kiss her lips. She moans as I rub circles with all of my fingers. I pull out my fingers and moan as she sits up. I look at my fingers, covered in her fluids, and smile. I stick my fingers in my mouth and moan as I feel her fluids mix with my saliva.
"Baby you are so, so wet." I breathe heavily as I crawl back to her.
"Do you want more babe?" She said hotly as she straddled me.
"Yes, I want all of it." I moaned she sat on my chest.
I flipped us over so she sat on the bed. My knees touched the cold, tiled floor. Slowly, I pushed her back against the mattress and moved back to her folds. My mouth hovered a foot above and I felt my mouth water as I rubbed her folds. They glistened in the light and she moaned as I pulled my fingers out of her. I watched as the fluid dripped down my fingers, memorized. Smiling, I leaned down and touched my cock and rubbed it gently. I moaned loudly as I stroked her fluids along its sides.
"Mer, I don't have a condom." I sighed.
She got up and smirked at me.
"Who says we are doing that? We don't need a condom all the time. Let me." She smiled looking at me.
I smiled as I got on the bed opposite her. She crawled to me and kissed my legs. My hands were still stroking my thick member that was covered in her fluids and throbbing to be handled by her. She sat up as she reached my thighs and I watched her hands run sensually down her body. I moaned as she slipped a finger inside herself and pulled it out. She slipped two more fingers in herself and gasped as she rocked on top of me.
"Fuck. You are so hot, babe. But what are you doing?" I asked not being able to take my eyes off her fingers which pumped in and out of her.
"Shhh! Roll with it." She smirked and moaned pulling her fingers out.
I nodded and felt beads of sweat appear on my chest. I smiled as her fingers shined and she moved them closer to my mouth. She held the dripping fingers in front of me and I smiled. Opening my mouth, I sucked on them hard, moaning at the taste. She smiled and began to push her finger into my mouth. I groaned as I let my tongue swirl around her fingers inside my mouth.
"Mmm." I moaned as she pulled her fingers from my mouth.
She started to pump her fingers in and out of herself moaning every second and I moaned as she caresses my dry cock with her other hand. I smiled as her wet hand left her folds and rubbed my member. It grew larger in response and I smiled as she let her saliva drop on it. I used my own hands to rub her saliva over it and watched as she laid next to it. Her tongue wrapped my shaft and I moaned as I started to rub faster. I watched the tip and saw clear fluid escape. Her hands grasped my cock and she began to deep throat me. I held back yells and my head thew back as she took my whole length in her mouth. The sound of her sucking me was wonderful as I gripped her hair tightly.
"No condom necessary." She moaned in between pushes.
"Keep going babe. Faster!" I said breathlessly.
She nodded and I watched as she picked up her pace and moaned as she moved faster. Her hands rubbing my cock and her tongue wrapping my member was more than enough to give me an orgasm. I moaned loudly as I saw a jet of white, thick fluid spray her mouth. I kept moaning as she continued to deep throat me. Her saliva and my load mixed and ran down my erecting member only making me have a larger orgasm.
"Fuck! Baby!" I grunted loudly not caring who heard us.
My body pulsed as shook violently as she sucked all of the fluids. Her hands stroked my member faster, releasing the rest of my load.
"My turn." I said, panting as I came down from my high.
She nodded as I laid on her. My lips locked with hers and I tasted myself. I moaned as her tongue rubbed against mine. Holding her hair, I moved to her neck and sucked on it.
"Mmm. Derek." She said pulling at my hair as I left a red mark on her clavicle.
I cupped her breasts and let my saliva drip between them. She moaned and I sat on her chest. I used my still wet member to spread the saliva around her breasts.
"Oh! Babe!" She moaned as my member sat comfortably in her cleavage. I got up and laid down on her again, lower this time. Using my hands to spread her legs, I blew on her glistening folds gently.
"Ahh! Cold!" She shook.
The smell of her arousal energized me and I let my tongue run down her folds. I moaned as I let my face bury inside her and let my tongue, massage the inside of her folds. Her legs closer around my neck and I smiled picking her up. Holding her against the wall, I continued to suck at her clit. Her fingers tangle in my hair and pull hard as I speed up my tongue.
"Don't stop!" She moaned loudly.
I smiled inside her and kept going faster. I pushed her down on the bed and never let my mouth leave her folds. She tasted wonderful as her legs tightened their grip around my neck. I moved a hand up and held a finger over her mouth. She nodded and let out a sharp breath. I smiled as she moaned quietly and cummed on my face. I opened my mouth and drank the delicious fluids as they poured in. I moaned as I made sure to get every drop that I could. I collapsed next to her and pulled the sheets over us. We both took deep breaths as I held her close to my chest. She pressed her face into my neck and kissed it softly.
"I lied." She said into my ear.
"About what?" I asked surprised.
"I don't skate. Well, I haven't. No in the past 10 years." She smiled as laid on top of me.
"That's okay. I'll teach you. Hockey player here." I laughed as I kissed her head.
"If I fall, you are going to be my cushion." She says muffled into my chest.
"Yes dear." I smiled and watched her sit up as her pager rang.
"I have to go." She said pulling on her clothes.
I get up and pull my clothes on and corner her against a wall. She giggled as my lips locked with hers.
"I'll meet you at the lobby at 6?" I asked checking my watch.
"I look forward to it." She smiled.
I caressed her face and outlined her features. Her emerald green eyes stared into my soul, making my head skip a beat. I smiled as she softly pecked my lips. I let her walk out of the room and laughed as the flowery scent lingered in the room. I walked out of the room and pulled out my phone. Addison was calling again. I groaned and declined it. If it was an emergency the hospital would page me. She was calling and I did not want to talk. Walking into the bathroom, I checked myself in the mirror. I smiled in the mirror. I was very good-looking. Before I left, I noticed something on my ear. Walking closer to the mirror, I bent my ear slightly and touched the red mark. Meredith had left a hickey on me. I laughed and winced slightly as I pressed a flat metal instrument to it. After a few minutes, I lifted the metal and felt the cold skin. It was less red but I knew it would take a little bit longer to heal. My pager started to ring and I checked it. Richard was paging me to his office. I ran down and walked in to Meredith standing in front of his desk. My eyes drifted to her neck and saw that she was holding it. Had I left a hickey? I smiled and my face became serious as I read her expression. Had Richard found out about us? I stood next to Meredith as my heart raced. Richard said nothing but stood up and shut the door. Once he was turned around, I squeezed Meredith's shaking hand. She pulled away and stepped closer to me.
"My wife is in the Virgin Islands." He said smiling as he walked back.
"That's a nice vacation place." Meredith said shakily.
"Very bright, sunny." I smiled as my stomach twisted.
"Beautiful beaches." Meredith added taking a breath.
"I know that I should have someone here if there is a complication but I don't want her to know. Adele should rest on her vacation." He said leaning on the table.
"Richard." I said before getting cut off.
"I have everything settled, all I need to know is how confident you are Derek. I have no doubt that Meredith is the best neuro intern. Are you the best right now?" He asked looking at me.
My stomach flipped as Meredith turned to me.
"I can do this Chief." I said confidently.
He nodded and waved his hand dismissing us. I immediately turned and walked out of the room into an on-call room. I shut the door and started to loose my breath. What would Meredith say she I talked to her. Everything was blurry and I held the wall of the room to steady myself. I  looked around to see everything spinning. I let go of the wall and tried to walk in a line to the bed. I failed stood still. My arms started to shake with my legs and I left the cold floor tiles against my cheeks. Gripping the floor, I started to hyperventilate. I could not move or breathe properly. Tears streamed down my face. I felt powerless and weak. Powerless against the attack and weak because I wasn't honest to Meredith. The door opened and I saw a pair of black shoes walk in. The door shut and the person laid in-front of me. Meredith had a calm face as I gasped against the floor.
"Derek." She said.
My eyes moved everywhere and I couldn't focus on her.
"Derek!" She said clearly.
"I- I'm her- here." I stuttered, breathlessly.
She moved closer and pressed her forehead against mine as I shook.
"Give me your hands." She says as her minty breath filled my lungs.
"I- can't." I reply.
My fingers refuse to move and I can't feel anything except her warm breath against my face. She took my hand and squeezed them. I felt her fingers push between mine and felt my heart rate slow. She moves closer and her whole body presses mine. The deep green in her eyes relaxed mine.
"We are going to stay here. Until you feel ready to get up."She smiled softly pressed her lips against the corner of my mouth.
I nodded and held her fingers tightly. More tears came down my face and I closed my eyes tightly. Her fingers left my hand. I pulled them back but she refused to return them to my hand. A second later, her smooth fingers caressed my jawline. I took deep breaths and nodded.
"I'm ready to get up now." I said softly.
"Okay." She said as I opened my eyes.
I pushed myself off the floor and let her pull me up. I stood against the wall and she wrapped her arms around me. I did the same and held her close.
"Meredith...about what the Chief said..." I started.
"I'm not asking anything. You'll tell me when you are ready to. I trust you. I just want you to know that you can trust me. With anything." She said into my ear.
I pulled my head out of her neck and pressed my forehead against hers.
"I know I can trust you." I said softly holding her face.
I had to tell Meredith about Addison. I took in the smell of her hair. My body was calm as she wrapped her arms around my neck. Her fingers ran through my hair, massaging my scalp. As a neurosurgeon, I am supposed to know the best thing to relax with. Food, TV, a puzzle are things I used to say. Now, the only thing or person I need is Meredith. I smiled and let my hands wrap her waist. Our lips brushed before my pager started to ring. I groan as she pulled back.
"I have to go." I say upset.
"It's okay. Only an hour until we go skating." She smiled.
"Yeah. One long hour." I groaned as she held the door open.
I nodded and walked out of the room. My pager rang again and I looked at the flashing letters.
"ER" I read out-loud.
I ran down the stairs and made my way to the pit. As I walked in, I saw Bailey drilling burr holes.
"Woah! What do we have?" I asked snapping on gloves.
"Sorry Dr. Shepherd. He is a 34 year old man that fell from his roof. He was bleeding into his skull too fast." Bailey says fast.
"That's alright Bailey. You saved him." I smiled.
She smiled back and started working on his chest. I booked him for a chest CT and start to write in his chart. As I write, I look up scared by the sound of Meredith yelling. She walks down the hallway and yells.
"Viper?" She calls.
The man walks out of the lobby and smiles as Meredith pulls him into a hug. Immediately, my heart races faster as I realize this man as the one who kissed Meredith so long ago. She pulls away as I see the man coughing. He clutches his side and blood covers Meredith. I gasp as he falls to the floor and Meredith pulls his shirt up. I run to her as she gasps. This side has a cut that is almost fully black. It oozes with blood as she compresses the wound. I pull a gurney and help her place him on it. She climbs on him and pushes the wound as Alex pushes the gurney.
"Dr. Shepherd!" Bailey calls.
"I'll handle that. You need to go to your patient. He has questions." Bailey says.
I nod and watch as she runs after the two of them.
A half hour later, I pull my clothes off and step into the showers. I raise my arm and smell sweat. Looking at myself, I groan in disgust at the sight of another persons blood on me. I turn the knob in the shower and grab the shower head off the wall. I grab my personal loofah from my locker and walk into the shower. I let the water soak my body as run my fingers through my hair. I think about my life as I scrub off the blood from my legs. Addison is always in the back of my mind and it kills me that I can't be my absolute, true self with Meredith. She makes me want to be a better man. A better doctor, boyfriend and overall human. After a few minutes, I get out of the shower and wrap the towel around my waist. Walking out the shower, I surprised at the sight of Meredith standing a few feet from me. I smile as she walks closer in her tank top. I move closer to her and take a deep breath as her fingers caress my sides. My hands cup her cheeks and I lean down. Our lips connect and I am filled with a warm feeling.
"Mmm." I moan, sucking on her lower lip.
She pulls away and I watch as she rests her back against the lockers.
"The vanilla on your lips tastes wonderful." I say referring to her lip gloss.
"Thank you. I am trying something new." She smiles as her arms wrapped my torso from the back. My body is still soaking and she grabs the towel from my shoulders and rubs is against my loin [lower back]. I smile as and let her wipe the water off of my shoulders. I laugh as she tiptoes and kisses the crook of my neck. Her hands run down my spine and spread apart at the top of my shoulder blades that poke out my back. I smiled as she wiped the towel on each of them and moved to my front. We laughed as she wiped off my chest. I stood mesmerized by her touch and her smile as she tossed the towel around my neck. She tiptoes again and I pull her up. Our mouths meet passionately and I slide my tongue into her mouth. My hands wrap her waist and she giggles pulling away. My hair drips water on her and I push it back.
"I'm going to wait by the door." She smiles.
I nod as she walks away with my fingers loosely intertwined with hers. I whine and pull her back.
"Stay." I beg.
"You wouldn't be able to handle it." She says sexily before pecking my lips.
I let her hand go as she walks out of the lounge. She was right. I wouldn't have been able to handle it if she was here. I unwrapped the towel from my waist and let it rest it in my hands. My member stood erect and I groaned. She had already made me have an erection and she had only touched the top half of my body. 'Nuns Derek, Nuns' I thought to myself as I pulled a dark blue sweater over my dress shirt.
"You okay?" Meredith called after a few minutes.
I looked down and groaned in relief. My erection had shrunk substantially and I pulled on a pair of boxer briefs. Grabbing a pair of jeans, I pulled them on and quickly did the belt. Picking up my bag, I walked out of the locker room.
"I'm okay. Ready to go?" I smiled and asked.
"Yes." She smiled as she held my hand.
"How's Viper?" I asked as I opened the door of my car.
"Im not sure. Alex got the surgery." She said getting inside.
"I'm sorry. At least you will be assisting in Dr. Webber's surgery." I smiled as I sat in the drivers seat and started it.
"Thank you." She smiled as I held her hand and drove.
"You deserve it. By the way, you have to start studying." I said calmly as we pulled up to the indoor ice rink.
"My intern exams aren't for another..." She counts on her fingertips and whispers the numbers.
"10 months." I said as we got out of the car.
"Exactly." She says happily.
"Not for your intern exams. You have to drill burr holes by yourself and I have to watch you." I said as we held hands.
"Oh. Alright. I will do that." She smiled as we entered the building.
A rush of cold air entered my lungs and I wrapped my arms around Meredith. She laughed as she clutched me tightly. I smiled as we walked to the booth.
"2 skates please." I asked.
"Shoes sizes?" He asked.
"10 for me." I smiled looking to Meredith.
"9 thank you." She says.
"And how long will you be skating here?" He asked.
"I- What do you think about 2 hours?" I asked Meredith.
"2 hours sounds good." She replies smiling.
He nods and takes my card, swiping it through the machine. I smile as Meredith holds my sweater tightly. I gently hold her to me and laugh.
"Here are the skates. And there are the wrist bands. I'll let you two put them on yourselves." The man said returning.
"Thank you." We both said.
I smiled and grabbed both of the pairs while she took the neon wristbands. I held her to my chest as we walked to the benches. I sat beside her and kicked off my shoes next to hers. I quickly pulled on the skates and got up.
"How long has it been since you did this?" I asked.
"10 years, so hold my hands." She said.
I smiled and nodded as she gripped my fingers. She almost immediately started to fall. Laughing, I held her up.
"It's not that funny." She said defensively.
"Not one bit." I replied jokingly as we approached the door.
I took a deep breath and stepped into the rink as she held the wall. She nodded as I loosened my grip on her arms. She smiled at me and I pushed my fingers between hers.
"This is really scary." She smiles as she starts gliding while still gripping my hand.
"You are doing better than most people after 10 years." I smile and wince at the pressure her hand puts on mine.
"I think I am getting used to it." She smiled as I looked back to my hand.
It was bright red because her hands was restricting my blood flow. She slowly released her grip on my fingers and I watched as they returned to their natural paleness. I held her other hand as she skated over to me. Her fingers warmed my cold hands. I laughed as she lifted her hands above mine and let them hover. She kicked off her feet and I watched as she glided down the ice away from me. I laughed again and followed her close behind. I reached out and pulled her waist to me. Her screamed and laughs as her legs leave the ground. Suddenly, I lose control and start to slip. I panic and lose my balance. My back hits the cold hard ice. She lands square on my chest and knocks the wind out of me. I groan and hold my chest as she rolls off me.
"I'm sorry!" She says getting up.
"It's okay." I cough.
"Are you alright?" She asked helped me up.
"Yeah. Just hurts." I smile as I hold her hand loosely.
"Im sorry." She says as I pull her close.
"I tried to pick you up and lost my balance. It was my fault, not yours." I say kissing her forehead.
She smiled and we skated around the rink for an hour. I watched her legs move gracefully across the rink and followed her. I smiled as the speakers came on.
"All persons with the green neon bracelets must exit the rink." The man said.
I laughed and walked to the door with Meredith. I hold her hand as I walk out. She giggled as I carried her to the benches. Once we finished changing out of the skates for shoes, we walked out of the building. I smiled at the empty mall and wrapped my hands around her waist.
"Do you want to walk around or go home?" I asked.
"Do you want to get something to eat first?" She asked.
"Right. I'm hungry." I smile.
She laughed and let herself fall into my chest. I pulled her in closer and caressed her cheeks. Everything stopped, frozen as I pressed my lips to hers. I took in the moment of pure bliss. Her arms wrapped around my torso and I moved closer. My fingers were tangled in her hair as I backed her onto the railing. I pulled away and she smiled.
"Pretzels?" I asked as her hands slid into mine.
"Of course." She replied.
I shook my head and broke out a smile. My hands moved her in front of me. Wrapping my arms around her neck, I pushed my face into her golden locks.
"Mmm, You smell wonderful." I smiled as kissed her neck.
"Thank you." She smiled as I unlocked my arms from around her neck and ran to the pretzel stand a few feet away. I pulled out my car and handed it to the man.
"2 pretzels please. No salt." I asked.
He nodded and handed me the pretzels with my card. I thanked him and ran back to Meredith. She laughed and took the pretzel that I held out. I smiled and pulled her onto an escalator. She took a bit of her pretzel. I did the same as we made our way to the roof. By the time we were on the roof, out pretzels were gone. Intertwining my fingers with hers, I led her onto the roof. She shook as the cold wind whipped past us.
"Cold?" I asked.
"Yeah a little." She replied pushing herself deeper into my chest.
I took of my black leather jacket and wrapped it around her shoulders. She smiled while sliding her arms into the long sleeves.
"It's too big." I frowned as she continued to shake.
"Wait, here, That should help." I smiled as I zipped the jacket to the bottom of her chin.
"Thank you." She smiled as she leaned against me.
"Always." I laughed looking over the ledge.
I backed away from the ledge and pulled her close. We laughed as her hands wrapped my neck and ran through the hair on the back of my neck. I let my hands pull her waist closer to me. She tiptoes and presses her lips against mine. Smiling, I tilt my head and let my lips bury themselves in hers. She does the same as sparks fly from us. I slide my tongue in her mouth and gently let it explore the area.
"Mmm." I moan as her tongue rubs against mine.
I suck on her upper lip and she leans in. The cold air feels non-existent as I lower myself. My knees bend and I tighten my grip around her waist. I feel a pang on my lip and suck in air. Playfully, I let my teeth bite her lip. Our laughs are silenced as I lift her off her feet. She squeals and hold my shoulders tightly as I hold her legs off the ground. I laugh and pull away to take a breath. We laugh while taking deep breaths. Her exhales touch my face and fill me with lust. I spin around with her in my arms and listen to her laugh. It feels right to have her with me. I laugh and let her legs down. Her flats land on top of my shoes and I smile.
"I'm sorry." She says trying to move off my feet.
"Stay." I whisper into her ear.
She nods. Her feet stop moving and her head rests on my shoulder. I smile as she hands wrap around my chest. My feet don't feel her weight at all as I let my arms wrap her body. My fingers rest on her back and I smile wide. I move my feet as though we are dancing. Hear her laugh quietly makes me feel warm and fuzzy. The smell of her hair makes my lungs expand and take in every little scent. Time is forever frozen, letting me remember everything.
"Meredith?" I ask as I continue swaying with her.
She nods and gently kisses my neck signaling that she is listening to me.
"I don't know how I survived without you." I say softly.
"You won't have to survive without me anymore." She says softly making it a perfect conversation.
I let out a chuckle and let my head rest on her shoulders as she slides her feet off mine. It starts to drizzle and I groan as she pulls away from me.
"Let's go. Long day tomorrow. We need to sleep." I smile.
"Together?" She jokes as I lift her off her legs.
I laugh and smile as her hands wrapped around my neck.
"It's 11 already. Aren't you tired?" I asked carrying her down the stairs from the roof.
"I am a little tired." She said with her mouth pressed against my neck.
"I know." I said setting her feet back on the tiles of the forth floor.
My fingers intertwined with hers and I held her close to my chest. I had never been like this over a woman. Though it was confusing, it was wonderful. We walked down empty the halls of the fourth floor as she pulled me along. Once she ran ahead, her head turned and I was taken aback. I didn't feel anything but happiness. I laughed and caught up with her. We walked down to the parking lot, I opened the door.
We looked outside and groaned. It was pouring and cold.
"Come here." I smiled.
Her chest pressed against mine as my fingers played with the zipper of my jacket on her. I pulled it down and moved the jacket above our heads.
"Ready?" I asked.
"Yeah." She smiled and we started to run.
The raindrops hit my leather jacket fast and hard. We laughed and giggled as we ran to the car. Our shoes were soaked and my jeans were wet. I held the jacket over her as a car splashed water on us. We screamed and I put the jacket over her head.
"Keep going! I'll meet you in the car!" I yelled as she turned back to me.
She nodded and ran faster that we could've together. Rain froze my body as I ran towards the car. I heard the passenger door close and jumped into the drivers seat a few seconds after. She shivered in the seats as I cranked up the heater to the max. I watched her shake through the hair in my eyes and felt awful.
"We have to stay here." I said taking off my shoes.
"What?." She asked handing me my jacket.
"I can't drive. We would definitely get into an accident, so we gotta stay here. And we have to takes off our clothes if we don't want hypothermia." I said taking off my wet socks.
"I know." She said pulling off her own socks.
I smiled weakly as I shook. I watched as she put the jacket in the backseat and stepped over the console.
"What are you doing?" I asked as I watched she sat on my lap, facing me.
"I'm cold and I need you for central heating." She joked.
I laughed as she bent down and kissed my lips.
"You are more of my central heating than I am to you." I laughed as my fingers played with the hem of her shirt. The rain suddenly stopped and she smiled. I groaned as she sat back into her seat.
"You are an evil human being." I smiled as I started the car.
"Thank you." She smiled and kissed my cheek as I approached her house.
I ran over to her door and carried her to the porch as the rain started to pour again. She giggled and opened the door.
"I'm going to go. I'll see you tomorrow." I said softly as my fingers caressed her cheeks.
"No, please stay." She asked pulling me close.
"Meredith..." I started.
"I'm just worried. The rain is really aggressive today. I don't want you get hurt on the way home. Plus, I have some of your clothes here anyway." She begs.
"Alright." I smile and let her lead me to her bedroom.
On our way up she turns on the stairs. I laugh and pick her up. Her legs wrap around my torso and I lean against the wall. My lips press against hers and I set her down. She understands that I am tired and that we should sleep. She stands by her bed and I smile as she pulls off her socks. I do the same and press my chest against hers.
"Let me help you." I smirk and watch her nod.
My fingers pull the wet shirt above her head. She cringes as the cold shirt touches the warm part of her skin. My hands drop the short on the floor and caress her freezing waist. I look into her eyes and smile. The irises are a mix between blue and green and send goosebumps up my arms. I gently push her onto the bed. Pulling off my shirt and jeans, I get underneath the sheets. She smiles and let's her pants fall out of the bed. I pull her back closer to me and let out a deep breath. Her legs are warm and I can feel every inch of her body pressed to mine.
"I don't know how I could ever go without you." I smile.
"Me neither." She says softly.
I laugh, put a hand over her shoulder and pull her closer, underneath the sheets. Her legs tangled with mine and she leaned, resting her head on my chest. Gently, I rubbed my calfs against hers and I and kissed her head. We turned on our sides and I spooned her. The smell of her hair entered my lungs, sending soft shocks through me. I put a hand over her and pulled her back against my chest. I kissed her soft neck and watched her fingers interweave between mine. Her touch made me feel wonderful. Like I was the only man ever. Like I was right for her. She pushed closer and sent a wave of warmness through me. I smiled softly as tingles ran down my body. I close my eyes and let myself fall asleep. I opened my eyes to see the sky. Looking around, I got up. The clouds were cold to the touch unlike the other times. Something was wrong. Chills ran down my back as the clouds dissolved and left me to fall. I looked around and saw ocean. I looked around frantically to find Meredith but she didn't appear. I looked below and saw Addison. My mind was racing. Why didn't Meredith appear like usual? Why didn't I see Finn with Addison? I was on the ground in a second. Addison pulled me in for a kiss and I pulled back when our lips touched.
"Who's this?" I turned around to see Meredith.
There were tears in eyes.
"Meredith." I ran to her but I couldn't touch her.
Every step that I took, I moved backwards instead of forwards. Meredith fell on the ground and buried her head inside her knees.
"Meredith, I didn't mean to." I yell trying to run.
Suddenly she dissolves and I am in icy water. I shiver as I try to swim. What was happening? Why was everything different? The water froze my body and I watched as my fingers turned purple above the surface. My legs stopped moving as my teeth chattered. I hugged myself trying to maintain heat in the water but nothing worked. I screamed in pain as the water took pleasure in tossing my body around. I closed my eyes and took deep breaths as the water pushed me under the surface. I opened my eyes when the water warmed. I was underwater and couldn't breathe. Struggling, I swam to a small cave and coughed when I raised myself out of the water in the cave. My fingers returned to their color and I continued to cough up all the water. My head felt heavy as I pushed against the floor and my bare feet touched the cold stone. While I steadied myself, I looked around. I pushed my hair back out of my face and touched my scrubs. Why was I wearing scrubs? They were soaked and weighed me down. I looked up and saw nothing. Everything was black. I looked back and breathed heavily as I saw the water. I looked up and saw darkness. I was in a void. I held my hands out and walked to make sure that I didn't walk into something. My hands touched something freezing and I pull back swiftly. Suddenly a series of lights lit the floor. Looking around, I saw a glass wall. Meredith was on the other side. She was on the floor and I could her her sobs.
"Meredith!" I yelled and banged on the glass.
Nothing happened and I felt sharp pain in my chest as I watched the tears fall from her eyes.
"Meredith!" I yelled and banged again, hoping it would make some difference than the first time.
"She can't hear you." I looked around to see where the deep voice came from.
There was no one that I could see at all.
"Who are you?" I asked as I kept my eyes on Meredith.
"Your subconscious." The voice said.
"Let me go to her then!" I yelled as she wiped her eyes.
It made no difference because the tears continued flowing down her face. I could feel tears in mine.
"No." It said simply.
"Why not?!" I screamed as tears escaped my eyes.
"Watch her." It said again.
More tears fell down my face and I wiped them away as I put my hands against the glass, hoping it would disappear. Meredith looked miserable as she cried into her hands. All I wanted was to hold her and apologize. I felt like a monster for causing her pain. I studied her form as it slimed and shrunk. She disappeared and a little girl took her place. The girl was definitely Meredith as a child.
"This is Meredith at the age of five." The deep voice said.
I nodded watch the small girl. She was in a room that resembled a plain bedroom. I recognized the room as one of the rooms in her house. Was this her room? I looked around it and saw nothing decorated or personalized. The shelves were empty and bed had nothing on it except a doll. I looked at te little girl who was crying on the floor. Why was Meredith crying? She stood up and walked to the desk. I watched, confused as she grabbed a few tissues and wiped her eyes. Meredith walked to the bed and took the doll. She held it close to her chest as she walked out the room. The glass dissolved and I was in the room. I ran to her and pulled her closer.
"Why can't I touch her?" I yelled as my fingers went through her arms.
"You are in her memories. Just watch and observe what she had been through." My subconscious said.
I nodded and followed her down the hall as my clothes changed. I was wearing soft pajamas pants and no shirt. I walked down the stairs behind her and heard nothing. The stairs creaked as she walked and she froze. I could tell Meredith wasn't supposed to be awake because she looked around before continuing to walk. We walked down the hall as she held the doll closer to her chest. I was so confused but watched as she walked in the kitchen. I gasped as Ellis Grey stood by the counter. Blood ran down her arms, coming from cuts on her wrists. The scalpel dropped on the counter as she fell to the floor.
"Mommy?!" Meredith dropped the doll and ran to Ellis who laid on the floor.
"Should I call 911?" Meredith asked.
Tears sprung from my eyes as her mother shook her head.
"Be an extraordinary woman Meredith." Ellis said.
Her head dropped and she was unconscious. Meredith ran to the phone and pressed 911. She spoke calmly into the phone as she picked up her doll.
"My mommy tried to kill herself." Meredith said softly watching her mother limp on the floor.
"This didn't actually happen right?" I asked.
"It did." The voice said.
I was back in darkness for a moment.
"Why are you showing me this?" I asked.
"You need to see it." The voice spoke.
"Is Meredith seeing my memories?" I asked as everything dissolved and I was back in the bedroom.
"No. She doesn't need to see anything yet." The voice said.
I nodded as I walked to the table. Meredith sat on the chair. She was beautiful now, almost exactly like how she was when we went to sleep. Her features were all the same except her hair which was a fierce pink. I smiled as I moved right behind her. I leaned down and breathed deeply. Her scent was perfect. Some kind of flower that I tried to remember. I stood over her and watched as she looked at a few envelopes laid out on the table.
"Meredith at age 17." The voice said.
She got up and sprinted down the stairs, carrying the envelopes with her. I ran after her and felt myself freeze up at her perfect figure, leaned against a doorway. She picked up the landline and held it to her ear. I reached out for her and my fingers grazed hers. I smiled feeling the rushing of adrenaline when I was with her. I looked at her as she bit her lip.
"They came." She said putting the phone on speaker.
"What did they say?" A girl spoke through the phone with a tone of urgency.
"I don't know, I haven't opened them." She said sitting at the counter.
Confused, I sat on the barstool next to her. She put the five envelopes in a line. I read the writing on the first one.
Yale University
"Are you opening them?" The girl spoke through the phone.
"I will tell you what they say in a few minutes." Mer said before hanging up.
She got up and I followed her to the window. She opened the curtains and frowned as she looked at the driveway. She sighed and walked to the kitchen. I stood in the doorway and watched as she picked up the phone. Holding up to her phone, she started to pace. I studied her every move, watching her from every angle.
"Hey mom." She said putting it on speakerphone.
"Hey Meredith." Ellis said from the phone.
I walked back to the counter and read the second envelope.
Bowdoin College
I went to that college. Smiling, I turned back to Meredith.
"Are you coming home?" She asked.
"Not yet. I am in surgery." Ellis said.
"Mom, you promised. I'm opening the letters today." She said sitting on the barstool next to me.
"Meredith. I am in surgery." Ellis spoke.
"Mom, you promised ages ago." Meredith said.
I leaned over and looked into her intoxicating eyes. They pulled me in even though they were closed and dripping with tears.
"No, Meredith. I'll call you later." Ellis said.
Meredith open her mouth to speak.
"Bye-" Meredith was cut off by the beep.
I wanted to hug her but I wasn't in the moment. I watched as tears fell from her eyes and hit the floor. What kind of mother isn't there when their kid opens their college letter? Her hair and palms hid her face but I heard her sniffles that were muffled.
Suddenly, I was trapped behind the glass again. An adult Meredith sobbed on the other side. A man walked up to me and I couldn't see his face. In the place of his head, there was a black void.
"What do you think I showed you this for?" He asked leaning on the glass.
"How am I supposed to know? You are me so how about you answer the question?" I spat.
"Meredith has suffered in her life. I just showed you two ways. We don't have time to show you anything else. You should not hurt her." He said crossing his arms.
"WE WONT." I spoke through gritted teeth.
"What are WE planning to do about Addison?" He asked.
"I-." I was cut off by him.
"We don't have any more time. Think about the question." He said walking into the darkness.
I turned back to Meredith who was still crying. Stabbing pains entered my chest watching her shake. I pushed against the glass and gasped as it disappeared. I shook awake and smiled at Meredith, who laid partially underneath me
"Morning Derek." She whispered.
"Morning Babe." I smiled tangling our fingers.
"What do you dream about?" She asked as her fingers drew her name on my palm.
"I- I don't remember." I answer truthfully.
"What about you?" I smiled pulling the sheets higher on us.
"I can't remember." She smiled as my lips kissed her her cheek.
The alarm was ringing and I shut it off. Sunlight streamed in through the windows as she moved underneath me and moaned loudly.
"I don't want to go to work!" She groaned as I laid on her.
"Why not?" I laughed, kissing her gently.
"It's already Thursday. Work means taking a shower, which means getting out of bed which means no warm McDreamy holding me." She whines, muffled into my cheek.
"Not necessarily." I laugh.
I smirk and hold her legs around my torso. She laughs and wraps her arms around my neck. I smile as I lift her off the bed and hold her close. Looking at time, I groan out loud.
"I'm going to be late for surgery, we don't have enough time." I whined carrying her into the shower.
"It's okay. We don't have to. But we both need showers. It's faster." She smiled in my arms.
"Not really faster but you are so convincing." I laughed and stepped into the shower.
She laughed as my naked body pressed hers. The warm water poured down us and Meredith lowered her legs and stood on the floor of the tub. Her arms wrapped my neck and I smiled wide. My hair was already soaked and I pressed my lips against her soft ones. Her hands tangled in my hair as I held her waist. Our lips sucked each other and I felt a cold liquid on my head. I moaned into her mouth quietly as her fingers scrubbed the shampoo through my hair. How did Mer know to pull my hair? Was it a common thing? Whatever it was, it felt amazing. Her soapy hands finished my hair and I let my fingers move her hands to my chest. I pulled my mouth from hers and breathed deeply.
"What is the hair thing?" I asked scrubbing shampoo in her hair while she ran her fingers down my chest.
"What hair thing?" She laughed as my fingers scrubbed behind her ears.
"The pulling?" She asks.
"Yes, the tugging." I nodded as I walked behind her.
"I don't know, you seem to be liking it." She says as I let my fingers tangled deep in her golden hair. I grab the body wash and spread it on the loofah.
"I do. Very much." I laughed.
She giggled as I scrubbed the loofah along her clavicle and neck. I smiled and scrubbed her neck carefully, making sure not to hurt her. I smiled and pressed my chest against her back. Rubbing her arms with the loofah, my lips connected with her neck and I moved up to her ear. I suck at the helix of her ear. She takes the loofah and kneels down to my legs. I smiled as the loofah runs up my legs followed closely by kisses. She reaches my chest and I laugh as I take the loofah and step underneath the water. After I am completely clean, I hand the loofah to her.
"I am going to make you breakfast." I laughs and kiss her lips.
"Alright. I'll be out soon." She says.
I smile and step out of the shower. She pecks my lips as I wrap a towel around my waist.
"Your clothes in the second drawer of my dresser." She calls.
"Thank you." I yell back as I shut the bathroom door.
I walk into her bedroom and into her closet. As I look around, I smile and think about her in each of these clothes. My favorite thing that she wore was her Dartmouth collage shirt. I smiled and started to walk down to the end. All of the clothes smelled like her and filled my lungs from many feet away. I reached the dresser and opened the second drawer of her dresser. My clothes were the first things there. I smiled and pulled them out. I froze as I turned around and something caught my eyes. A beautiful black dress was shining in the light. It had sparkles on it and a long v-neck. I could feel my heart start racing just imagining her in the dress. I stood frozen and stepped closer. I shook my head and walked out of her closet and shut the door. Carrying my clothes down the stairs, I set them on the barstool. Without putting them on, I pulled out a pan and set it on the stove. I turned it on and opened the fridge. The dress stayed in the back of my head as I pulled eggs out. Grabbing a measuring cup, I cracked the eggs in and picked up a fork. While stirring the eggs, I started the coffee machine. I grabbed the milk and poured a little in the eggs. Putting it back, I grabbed peppers and onions from the pantry. I quickly cut them, tears falling from my eyes as I finished the onion. I put the left over in a box and placed it in the fridge. Sunlight streamed in the window as I mixed the eggs. Smiling, I buttered the pan and poured half the eggs inside it. I grabbed the salt and pepper grinders and turned them over the eggs. I placed two pieces of bread in the toaster as I hear the shower stop running. I washed my hands and walked to the island. I was dry now except my hair was still dripping. Quickly I put on my boxer briefs and a white dress-shirt. Smiling, I pull on a red sweater and pants. My khakis sit loosely around my waist as I run to the stove. I grab a spatula and flip the omelette. I pull the toast from the toaster. I smile as I place a piece of cheese onto the omelette and feel Meredith's hands wrap my torso. I can smell the wonderful flowery scent as she buries her head into my back. I smile as I feel her fingers pull my fly up and do the button on the khakis. I slide the omelette on a plate and pour the rest of the eggs in the pan. I feel Meredith's hands pull a belt through the belt loops of the khakis. I laugh and turn around after she buckles the belt.
"Thanks." I smile.
She is wearing the Dartmouth shirt that has a hole in the back of the neck.
"No problem." She smiles as I put the other omelette on a plate and walk to the table carrying our food. She smiled and I can see her watch me eat my eggs. My pager rings and I groan out loud.
"I'm late for surgery." I pout.
She laughs and walks to me.
"I'll see you later." She says softly.
I smile as she puts a hand on my chest and kisses me softly. My lips feel tingles as she pulls away quickly for me to go. I smile and grab my bag before walking out the door. As soon as I get in the car, my pager starts to ring.
"I'm coming." I say annoyed as I start driving towards the hospital.
I get to hospital and see a massive head trauma.
"Tim Cartet, fell of a building. Massive injuries. Shepherd he needs a burr holes." Bailey says.
"Already doing it." I say drilling.
A few hours later, I walk out of the OR and laugh. Walking into the hall, I see the patients wife stand up.
"The surgery was a success. Tim is recovering in the PACU for an hour and then you can see him." I smile.
Tears fall from her eyes and she hugs me. I smile and wrap my hands around her shoulders.
"Thank you." She says pulling away.
I nod and walk away from her as I check my watch. Richards surgery starts in five minutes. I groan exhausted and head into the OR. I haven't seen Meredith all day and I miss her.
I head into the scrub room and start to scrub my hands. I smile seeing Meredith in the OR. A sudden unexplainable feel washes over me. Time stops and I watch Meredith. She looks up slowly and I watch her face turn into a smile. I smile back. My dreams rush into my head clearly.
"You shouldn't hurt her." The voice said.
"We won't." I spat.
"What are WE planning doing about Addison?" The voice asks.
The memory of the conversation repeats in my head continually. My phone rings for the twentieth time today and I ignore it knowing that it is Addison.
"You will tell me when you are ready to. I trust you." 
Her words echo in my ears loudly. I wasn't ready then. Was I ready now? I walk into the OR and drink a shot of coffee. Richard lays down and I stand over him.
"How are we doing?" I ask as Meredith stands on his other side, securing the table.
"Did you lock up the gallery?" He asks.
"Don't worry, we are flying under the radar. It's a beautiful night to save lives." I smile.
We finish the surgery in 3 hours and Bailey asks Meredith to do post op. I smile and nod as I walk out of the OR. I head into an on-call room and collapse on the bed. Pulling the sheets to my nose, I shove my face into the pillow and think about Meredith. My phone rings again and I silence it after seeing Addie's name on it. I rest my head on the pillow. Meredith and I have been together for the past 2 months. She deserves to know. I walk out of the room and grab Richard's chart. I smile as I see Meredith on the phone. I gently tap her and she turns and hangs up.
"Oh. Sorry. I though you were someone else. I'm so used to hiding phone calls about my mother." She says.
"No problem. Who was that?" I ask.
"The home called me earlier today. They thought I should go to the family activities tonight." She says as I nod along.
"My mother doesn't even remember me so I stayed here. They called me again to tell me that she was asking for me." She says softly.
"Ellis was lucid?" I stop flipping through the chart and place it on the nurses station.
She nods and looks down at the ground. I shake my head sympathetically and look around. When I see no one, I move my left hand and it pushes her hair back. She moves her head up to look up at me and I see they are shining. My fingers brush her ear and I caress her cheek. She looks down again and I kiss the top of her head gently.
"I'm sorry. How about dinner tonight?" I ask pulling away.
"It's not your fault. I would love to get dinner." She says.
"Meet me in the lobby in half an hour." I smile.
Her pager rings and she walks away as my eyes follow her. I sigh and nod my head. Meredith had trusted me with her secret. I had to believe that she would be understanding about Addison. I walk to the attending's lounge and check the time. It had already been 15 minutes. I pull on my regular clothes and my bag. I head down to the lobby and start charting. I look up to Meredith's svelte figure and smile. I push my laptop and charts into my bag.
"Long day." I sigh.
"Yeah." She says looking down at me.
"Somewhere out there is a steak with your name on it and maybe a bottle of wine." I smile.
"This is why I keep you around." She smiles.
"So we need to talk..." I say getting up.
It was time. I was going to tell Meredith about Addison after dinner. I cared about Meredith too much to lie by omission anymore.
"Wine first, talk later." She says.
"I see, you're trying to get me drunk so you can take advantage of me again." I laugh as I pull on my jacket.
"I think I like dating you." She laughs as I help her with her jacket.
"Me too." I smile as I use a hand to push my the hair out of her beige rain jacket. I reached for my bag and turned to the sliding door. My chest contacts seeing Addison standing just 20 feet away. My smile drops and I can feel my breath being taken away.
"Meredith, I am so so sorry." I say holding her hand.
I turn back to Addison as Meredith does the same.
"Addison. What are you doing here." I say smiling and trying to suppress my rage and fear.
Addison stands a foot from my face as Meredith stands next to me watching the two of us.
"Oh, you'd know if you bothered to return any one of my phone calls." She says.
"Hi. I'm Addison Shepherd." She says holding out a hand to Meredith.
I can feel my heart racing and I don't know how Meredith will react at all.
"Shepherd?" She asks looking at us as she shakes Addisons hand.
Addison let's go of her hand and points at her.
"And you must be the woman who's been screwing my husband." She says pointing at me.
Mer turns to me and I can tell she is in-verbally asking me if it is true. I can feel myself losing confidence and I reach out for her hand.
"Mer?" I ask watching a tear flow down her face.
She pulls her hand from mine and turns around. I watch in silence as she walks away and doesn't turn back.

Word Count - 11837
Long. Chapter. Very long chapter. Hope you liked it. I'm sorry for not updating quickly. I promise I'll update faster next time🤪

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