Silent Voice - Zelkpvp Novel

Chapter 38 The Argument

zelk pov

I entered the bathroom, thinking about taking a shower, but looking down at the floor, I saw a few red drops.

It took me a while to process that it was blood.

"Mega!" I called walking to his room.

He lifted his head innocently, looking up at me.

'What?' he signed.

"What?! There is blood again on the floor! Mega! I thought you stopped."

Mega's eyes travelled down, staring at the floor.

He stayed silent for a moment... then...

'Not everything is that easy...' he muttered.

My irritation got the best of me, spilling out. 

"Mega! We talked about this! You can just talk to me! I am always here for you!"

When his expression of guilt didn't change I started getting mad.

"You think I'm joking, I'm serious!"

'Calm down man,' Mega looked worried.

"No! I can't have this! I won't!" I almost yelled.

The annoyance from his behaviour really made me angry. 

Mega looked scared now, cowering away from me slowly, I must've looked pretty scary at the moment. 

"I love you! I can't have my boyfriend hurting!! I'm not going to do anything as long as you are ACTIVELY looking for other strategies and replacement behaviours! I need you to promise me-"

'No.' He had the courage to break off my sentence.

I didn't believe him.

What was he saying?...

At this point, I was fucking annoyed at him.

Why?... I didn't understand...

Why the hell would he want to keep hurting himself?

Who would ever do that?!

"IT DOESN'T MATTER. ALL THAT MATTERS IS THAT I NEED YOU!! Instead of cutting, talk to me, we can talk about anything to distract you from the feeling."

"You don't understand! It's not that simple!"

What was wrong with him? Jacob just couldn't understand why Mega was doing it to himself when he could just stop. (jUsT sToP)

"You think it's all that easy and smooth?! WELL, IT'S FUCKING NOT!"

I stood there in shock. I have never heard Mega yell at anyone before.

"YOU THINK I CAN JUST QUIT??! NO! I CAN'T!!"

His words brought me back to the real world.

The world full of pain and suffering.

And my Mega was a victim of that world.

He looked taken aback by his own yelling.

"Mega?" I said quietly.

He looked away from me, turning to face the wall.

"I need some alone time," Mega said quietly but harshly, his tone cold.

Silence hung between us. Longg, awkward silence...

I exited the room, still angry with him.

Thoughts wouldn't leave me alone as I tried to understand what I never could.