Faking Us

Chapter Twenty Nine

Hayley's POV

I should of known this would happen.

A part of me always knew of Jessie's infatuation for her neighbor but I didn't want to accept it. I didn't want to believe that I did not stand a chance with my best friend.

I stood there and watched as Morgan went after Kaden—who had the same luck as I did and watched what happened. Well I'm not sure if she had seen the whole thing, but I honestly don't care.

Jessie was left there with her hands covering her face, that's when I decided to approach her. "Jessie- what the hell was that?" I blurted out before I could stop it.

"Hayley don't even start."

"Don't start?" I scoffed, "Why did you kiss her!"

"Honestly, it's none of your business." Jessie tried to walk pass me but I grasped her hand and stopped her.

"Why?" I asked again but my voice betrayed me and broke.

"I like her—that's why. I know it was a messed up thing to do but I'm selfish, Hayley. You know that better than anyone."

Hearing her confession somehow hurt more than seeing the kiss. I wanted to hate Morgan for it. I wanted to blame her for being the person Jessie liked instead of me—but I couldn't. I couldn't hate Morgan any longer for that because it wasn't her fault. It never was — she didn't even know about Jessie's feelings.

"Why her?" I questioned again trying to hide as better as I could the immense jealousy that I was feeling on the inside.

"What?" Jessie looked at me with confusion. I could tell she was beginning to sober up —which was a good thing.

"What does she has that I don't?" I asked pathetically.

"I don't get what you are trying to do here Hayley," she said in pure confusion.

I'm not quite sure if it was the jealousy or the frustration— or perhaps the light effect of the beers I had drank just before coming here that influenced my next decision— the decision to act instead of talk. All I know it's that at that moment I didn't think of the consequences or rewards of it—I just went on and did it because I was tired.

I cupped Jessie's face and boldly brought her lips to mine in a kiss that felt anything but what I had hoped kissing those—soft, plump lips that I have I dreamt about for so long would... only to my disappointment. She didn't respond to it but she didn't push me away either and that was enough to sober me up. I pulled away from her with a bittersweet taste left on my mouth-but I know it will be considered sweet in comparison with the inevitable rejection that is about to come.

My best friend— or former best friend most likely after what I had pulled tonight was froze in front of me, standing there with her mouth opening and closing like a fish—at a complete lost for words. "You— why would you do that Hayley," Jessie whispered ever so softly in disbelief.

"Because I love you—" the words sprang out easily from my mouth before I even got the chance to stop them. Not that it mattered, after what I did I might as well come clean with my feelings — I have nothing to lose after that kiss. "I always have."

Jessie's curls bounced as she furiously shook her head — as if what I just told her was the last thing she wanted to hear. "Why are you doing this now, out of all the times why the hell now?"

"I-"

"No— forget it, I know why. You got jealous like you always do," she scoffed. "What did you expect from confessing especially now?"

"I didn't do it because you fucking kissed Morgan! Who I remind you has a girlfriend who saw what you did Jessica."

Jessie's eyes widen at that bit of new information and she gulped. We both knew Kaden Stone when angry— God knows I have been victim of it when I was a bitch to Morgan, like that time with the hose — now one can just imagine how she is when she's angry and heartbroken.

Jessie regained her composure before mustering a reply. "You wanted me to tell you what is that Morgan has that you don't?" She paused for a moment—her big doe eyes looking back at my green ones in anger. "She isn't you."

I could only stand there and take the blow of the harsh words said by the girl that I—till just few hours ago thought about as my whole world.

It hurt like nothing ever had. Not my mom's insults or even the beatings I've received from my dad hurt as much as that did. Perhaps because I knew they didn't love me and I didn't them neither. But Jessie has always has been the one person I thought honestly loved me, of course not in the particular way I wished for— but I thought she loved me as her friend because I was me and she— she was the only person I loved, in every way.

Now that I know that she likes someone else because they're everything but me... it was difficult to take in—so difficult. I was feeling so many emotions I couldn't name but two stood out and those were heartbreak and hatred — hatred towards myself for being the unlovable person I've always been.

For so long trying to convince myself it was the rest who were in the wrong but it was me. It was sad but it was reality. My reality.

"Screw you, Jessie." I could feel the tears pricking my eyes and to my disdain some rolled down to my cheeks. "I hope you're happy about what you did though. I ruined our friendship and you ruined a relationship — we are not so different after all it seems."

"We are not the same."

"Didn't say we were. The difference being that I lie, about many things—but unlike you I don't lie about who I am. I don't pretend to be this perfectly nice girl that needs everyone to like her because you don't like yourself."

I knew I had pushed a button with the last part even before I got pushed back by a fuming Jessie. "Fuck you! Fuck you and you're fucked up life Hayley! I never liked you and never will. We are done."

"Good."

If Jessie thought she would make me break down with those words she's more stupid than I thought.

Maybe she did break me a bit more than a little but I would never give her the satisfaction of knowing or seeing the effect of her words had in me—before today I wouldn't have cared if she saw me breakdown as she has seen me in the past— but not again, not after this.

So without saying anything else I walked away, leaving her behind.

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A/N - I wasn't planning on making Hayley's POV but I felt like this was a necessary chapter.