Broken in the Apocalypse

Chapter 22- It's all my fault

Flashback
Laurens POV:

I started into the mirror looking at my stomach. I was starting to show a little bit and I was so happy. Things were finally going good for me. It had been 4 years since we moved to the city.

I had gotten into a relationship with my boyfriend a year ago. We were cute together and he made me happy. But no matter how happy he made me I still loved and longed to be with Daryl.

I continued to look at myself in the mirror. I can't wait to hold this baby. I just a family of my own so I can make it so much better than mine. I'm going to make sure my baby has the best childhood possible.

I was only three months pregnant so we weren't sure if I was gonna have a girl or a boy. I wanted a boy but Josh wanted a little girl. We had moved in together two months before I found out. We had a nice two bedroom apartment and our families got along great. It was like a fairytale.

All of a sudden I got really dizzy and I felt like I was going to get sick. I ran to the bathroom and made it just in  time.

I puked everything I had ate out. After that I felt a little better but I was still dizzy. I decided to lay down and sleep for a while because Josh wouldn't be off for a while.

A sharp pain in my stomach woke me up. I sat straight up in bed and held my stomach. Something was wrong and I was scared. I got out of bed and went to the bathroom. When I got up I felt a very sharp pain in my stomach again but a lot more painful. I started crying. What's going on?

I changed and called Josh. He was almost home and said that he would meet me in the lobby of our apartment complex. I rushed down the stairs to meet him. When he got there I got into the car and he started driving.

Neither of us said anything to afraid to speak. Paralyzed by the fear of what was to come. Tears were streaming down my face and when I looked at him there were tears in his eyes too.

He looked at me and smiled a weak smile which I tryed to return but couldn't. He grabbed my hand and brought it to his lips. He kissed my knuckles and continued driving. It was only a ten minute drive to the hospital but it felt like hours.

We got inside and explained what was going on. I was rushed back to a room and given pain medicine to try and help ease the pain. A doctor soon came in and did an ultrasound.

"I, I'm so sorry but. But you lost the baby." she looked at us apologeticly and left the room.

"Im so sorry. This is all my fault." I said to Josh

"Babe no. It's not your fault don't do this. Don't blame yourself." he came and hugged me like if he let go I would disappear.

"We should go home now." I spoke with no emotion.

"Okay." he said quietly and let me go.

I changed and we left the room. Josh went to get the car so I didn't have to walk a long way. He pulled up with the car and got out to help me in but I just pushed him away. I know I shouldn't be ignoring him because he lost the baby too but I can't help it. This is what I do when something bad happens, it's like a natural way to react.

The car ride home is silent and when we get home I go straight upstairs. I rushed into our bedroom and locked the door. I sat on the bed and just let my tears fall. I couldn't hold it back anymore. I just lost my baby. Gone just like that. I heard a knock on the door.

"Babe, c'mon let me in. I know you're upset and I am to just please.........please let me in." I hear Josh say quietly through the door.

I walk over slowly and unlock the door. When it opens he looks at me with tear filled eyes and engulfs me in a hug. I hug him back tightly and we sink to the ground and just hold each other and cry.

A month later
(still flashback)

Me and Josh broke up two weeks after I lost tge baby. I just couldn't do it and Josh didn't want there to be and us anymore and I completely agreed with him. I mean he wasn't Daryl and that's who I really wanted to be with.

Josh moved out and let me keep the apartment. I was grateful for that because I didn't want to move back in with my mother or move in with my uncle. And my dad was clearly not an option seeing as we left him behind when we moved and my brother lived with my uncle.

I was laying in my chair looking out the huge window in the guest room. I pulled out my phone and dialed the number. It rung a couple of times before he picked up.

" 'ello"

"Um hey."

"Lauren?"

"Yeah it's me Merle. Is Daryl around?"

"Wow it's been a while princess! Nah he's out right now but, um I guess I can tell him ya called?"

"Ya it has and no don't worry about it. Um I gotta go but maybe I'll call you sometime."

"Okay I'll talk to you lat-"

I hung up on him before he could finish his sentence. I knew Daryl was there he just didn't want to talk to me because I left. Well you know what I'm done trying to talk to him. Done trying to apologize. I'm so over him.

If only, I'll never be over him.

A/N- Sorry it took so long to update! Hope you enjoy!

P.s. the picture on the side is of Josh

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