Marauder crack

Saying goodbye in a single gulp

On the Hogwarts express. Clutter of suitcases. Same faces from last September 1st, but they seem different. Older, more confident. In some of them, the first shade of beard finally appeared. Others learned how to use makeup. Some have passed from colleagues to friends, and others and passed from friends to boyfriends, as one of Malfoy's henchmen and a Fifth-grade Slytherin whose name James doesn't remember. They kiss on the corners, obstructing the passage of the rest until Sirius clears his throat and asks for passing.

- A Malfoy's slave 's flirting and you've spent another year polishing the broom. Aren't you ashamed?

- Nope- James lilts under his breath. - Not ashamed, mate, but hopeful.

And he says it with such conviction that Sirius can't help but smile while making their way to their usual compartment. He couldn't love James Potter more, not even training daily to do so.

- You're a basket case, Prongs. A fucking basket case.

They always sit in the last compartment, right at the end of the train because that way, they are the last to leave Hogsmeade station, and the last to get home, and the last to finish the course.

That time, when they reach the end of the train line, there is a group of students from the fourth year on the site that has always been THEIR site.

- Let's see, you little puppy twats- Sirius barks- to plant your ass somewhere else. C'mon, off you go.

All four kids look at Sirius. All four know his reputation. They look rather intimidated but dare a little class rebellion.

- The seats are not reserved- says the most daring of the four.

In two seconds Sirius has drawn with his wand and a beam of violet light his name in big baroque letters on the window pane.

- Now it is.

The fourth-years come out muttering their protests and complaining because it "is always the same". Sirius sticks his tongue out at them, sits down occupying two seats, stretches out his legs, and lights a cigarette while he complains bitterly that the younger students have no respect for the school traditions.

- What is your dishonest purpose for next year, Pads?- Ask James getting himself comfy.

- Getting Snape to die as a blondie. I would ask you about yours but she starts with I and ends with "Love you Lily". - He throws some cigarette smoke at James deliberately to the face, and the other one dodges so as not to cough. - What's so special with that girl, man, really? Why do you fancy her so much?

Sirius has asked him this before and heard how James listed all her apparent virtues. Long charts that started with the first day that he saw her in Transfiguration class and noticed the way she took her wand and never finished. Maybe it's the first time he's asked her not so much as an accusation, but with true and frank curiosity. To what for the better of that, James answers with the same frankness and that dreamy expression that he can't help but put on when it comes to her.

-I could give you many reasons but then you would try to contradict me. So let's say that besides I like her, I like myself when I'm with her. I explain myself?

"Before I loved you lot, I didn't even love myself".

- You explain yourself, Potter.

- Next year I'll get to kiss her. What do you bet?

Sirius doesn't "bet" anything. He just puts that smile that bends around the curves, dangerously in an insolent expression.

- Surely yes. After all, I would sleep with you as long as you will leave me alone. - He blows cigarette smoke in his face. - And you're not even handsome.

- Thanks, Sirius. I'll miss you on vacation too.

Very much, in fact. So much so, that when they arrive at Kings Cross, and platform nine and three quarters turn into a typhoon of faces smiling and tearful looks and mothers looking for their little ones, and the students also looking for their parents, he does not feel capable of saying goodbye. The same thing happens year after year. And every year, they repeat the ritual. James has his own phrase.

- Swear your intentions are not good.

And Sirius has his.

- I solemnly swear.

No more is said. They never say anything more. Sirius breaks through the wall of the station in direction to the muggle London, knowing the next time he'll see his beloved mate will be at "The Leaky Cauldron", before the Quidditch finals but every year, he feels as if James abandoned him in a dirty cell in Azkaban, a prisoner of a home that has always treated him like a renegade and marked his personality as well as his destiny.