Marauder crack

My map to your world

Remus could draw every corner of Hogwarts from memory and with his eyes closed, tracing the marauders' map. The hallways, the classrooms, the smells. He likes everything because every corner is as close to home as has never been. He knows at what point the secret passages become more narrow. Where do wet spots appear in winter, how it smells the common room when they first light the fireplace, by the end of September.

Wood, pumpkin, saffron, stone, books, ink. Hogwarts smells of their favorite things in the whole world and could spend hours at the owlery, listening to the empty howl of birds or in the library, watching Quidditch training by the corner of his eyes. But if he had to choose a place to walk on a night with the crescent moon, would be the covered bridge. Leaning on the railing, he can observe the sober majesty of Hogwarts, a foot away. The home he was not destined to take part in until Dumbledore's magic granted him a chance that, still, at times, he is afraid of losing. Of all the students at the school, possibly Sirius is the only one who can understand the colossal strength of his love for that place in Scotland. None of them, after all, have had another home. They both have a feeling that they will never have another.

It could be Sirius who was with him that night but he is not. Could be both watching the movie but that doggy rage has gotten in the way, nothing new.

- You come here often?

Daniel offers him a cigarette. Remus prefers not to smoke.

- Occasionally.

He doesn't know how long they spend on the bridge. Quite a while. The woods creak under their foot and when a wolf howls, somewhere in the forest, Daniel wants to know why he smiles. Sirius wouldn't need to ask, but Sirius is not there that night. "Sirius will never be there". And it hurts to admit it, but it is what it is. It doesn't matter how close the moon is some nights or how long he efforts to spread an arm to reach it because the earth and her pull in different directions.Daniel is nice. And handsome. Daniel is, to be honest, terribly handsome.

-It won't be possible soon- he says, consuming the cigarette.

- The what?

- This- points to the bridge and the night. - Simply a chat between a Gryffindor and a Slytherin. It won't be possible soon, I'm afraid. Things are changing.

And it is not for the best. That night, on the bridge, Daniel speaks to him cryptically about Slytherin and the hatred that is welling up, with immense force. "It is not that before there were many muggle lovers but now it's different, Remus". He could not define exactly what happens but in Slytherin the only things that are being spoken are about purity and power. Daniel's voice is firm but opaque. He does efforts to conceal a deep unease. He has a hard time talking about it. He doesn't know too much either. There is usually silence in the room when he enters.

- I think they hate me even more than you. I am a disgrace for his own home.

Little by little, the conversation turns to dark velvet and Daniel is getting closer and closer, and it's easy to talk to him, it's rather easy. Daniel does not press, and he knows how to listen, and he also understands what it means to be different and closer, well, he is even more handsome. And it's not Sirius, of course, it's not his lips those who approach gently, asking permission, nor are his fingers the ones who grope on the back of his neck and tickle his hair, but Sirius isn't there, isn't it? Sirius will never be there. Because of it, is it very terrible to wish for someone's lips, just to not be so alone?

- I've always liked you, Remus.

He closes his eyes and tries to forget everything except that tongue so soft that crawls into his mouth, parting his lips from him. It is clever and long and does not leave a single corner to explore and he does it well, he does it deliciously well for a first kiss. Sensual and cautious like jelly, it's hot and it's inside his mouth and if he didn't make him feel so lonely, if he didn't infect him with a hunger for someone else, god, it would be perfect.

He separates as carefully as he knows and it hasn't been bad at all, indeed, for a first and only kiss. Something in Daniel's eyes tells him that he doesn't need to explain.

-Well- he seems resigned but proud at the same time- sometimes you have to try even if you know you have no hope.

He says it without bitterness and the strangest thing of all is that at that moment, Remus wants to kiss him more than before. Because none of them mentions it, but they both know three is too many for a first kiss.

They stay a while longer on the bridge, smoking, talking, being. It is nice, after all, to find someone who understands. None know, that fixed in the shadows at the end of the bridge, the shiny-haired dog that looks at them and contains a fury so intense that it seems human.