Letter twenty-three.
Status: delivered.
Current location: Peter's grave.
Dear Peter,
I'm so sorry.
I miss you, big brother. I always hated when you called me little sister, but I would sell my soul now for you to do it again. It's been fifteen years. I can't believe you're actually gone. Sometimes it still feels like you're around. I swear, any time Cas gets smart I think it's you. He looks like you, acts like you, sounds like you. It's like instead of dying you just went back in age. You never met Caspian, did you? You would've loved him, I'm sure. I love him very much. I don't show it a lot, but I really do.
Now Lilith's gone, too. I've got none of my siblings any more. I've not got mum or dad. I worry about Marie. She's got Richard - her soon to be fiancé - but she seems to be pulling away from us. I did the same, and look where that got me. She still believes, though. Tells Anne-Lucy all of the stories Lilith told her. It's adorable, and part of the reason I'm actually able to write this. I remember, Peter.
I'm sorry I forgot for all those years. I'm sorry I denied everything. I'm sorry for treating Lilith and your kids the way I did because I didn't believe. I should've been there better for her. I know now how much she wanted to talk about our adventures after you all died. I wish I had. It's too late now.
Good God Peter, she loved you so much. Your heart would've broken to see her after the wreck. She only ate and drank to keep Cas alive inside her. She never left the house, hardly wrote or talked to anyone. She just sat inside and either played with Marie or cried. Even when you'd think she was happy, there was always an empty quality to her gaze. She was never whole after you left, Peter. I'm glad you're back together again now.
I always felt bad for Caspian, having never met you, but now I feel worse for Marie. She had to lose her father at four years old. Her mother almost lost herself, not to mention her aunt and uncle passed too. She had to live with a void where they used to be, where Caspian never had them there.
Remember the song? And when you proposed to Lilith for the first time? The snow? Father Christmas? When we all hugged after the Battle of Beruna? I miss you, Peter. So much.
All my love,
Susan
♔
here's some sibling shit.
i hope you have great day/evening!
- cecily <3
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SAUDADE - P. PEVENSIE (3)
Fanfiction❛ REMEMBER WHEN I SAID I WOULDN'T EVER LET YOU GO, THAT YOU WERE STUCK WITH ME? I MEANT IT. ❜ in which letters are exchanged between a found family throughout their lives.
