❛ GREY ❜ - seavey

twenty-three

once six had rolled around and melanie went to check on the two of them, it became very clear to her that the both of them talked.

so once she let them out, they both parted ways and walked home.

and the tears continued to fall the whole way home.

alaska was tired of crying so much and feeling like shit all the time, nothing was right since the pandemic.

not daniel, not her, not the two of them splitting up the way they did, and certainly not her running to cole when she barely knew him.

she just wanted to breath.

she wanted to stop feeling like she was being suffocated.

but it clearly wasn't that easy, and right now she had a lot to think about.

she needed to figure out what she wanted, and to stop trying to force herself with someone.

she needed to break up with cole.

that much was clear.

why was she even with him to begin with blew her mind now. she had just gotten out of a serious relationship and she was emotional and vulnerable... so maybe cole was in the wrong as well to jump at the first chance he got.

and as for daniel....

she didn't know.

not having him in her life at all sounded more tragic than ever now, but she was still in so much pain. If she did get back together her biggest fear would always be that history might repeat itself and she would lose him again.

then she'd really be lost.

when she got home, she ended up locking herself up in her bedroom all weekend, just to think.

and she was glad she took that pink blanket back, because daniel must've slept with it so much that it smelled like him now, and his smell had always comforted her.

especially now when she was considering being apart of his life again.

it wasn't until she called lori late that sunday night, that her thoughts finally started to make sense.

she sat on her bed, with her phone to her ear. blanket wrapped around her body and head like a hood. she chewed on her lip as she listened to the phone ring -

"hello?"

"lori!"

"what's up?"

"what have you noticed about dani these last few weeks?"

alaska asked urgently, as she wanted to clear some of her thoughts concerning her ex.

she couldn't see but on the other end of the line, lori was smiling.

"alaska you know i wouldn't have forced the two of you to talk if he was still the same daniel from before."

"so he's definitely changed- like he's back to normal?"

"you tell me, you spent three hours alone with him on friday. what do you think?"

alaska thought for a moment, "i think he's better... i think he still needs help but, i think he's not afraid to get it now."

"so what does that mean to you?"

"that.... i should give him a chance?... i dunno, i'm just- i'm scared of getting hurt again."

"i think he's scared of hurting you again too. honestly i think you breaking up with him was what he needed to realize that something was wrong in his life. and now that he knows, he wants to fix it."