Stay With Me Then (Then Series #4)

Epilogue

Listen to this while reading this song is really for Casper and Raffy nung unang beses ko pa lang narinig sila na agad naalala ko huhu.  

Epilogue 

Last First Kiss 

Kaya ko nga ba? Just seeing her makes me weak. Gusto kong lumayo siya sa'kin that is why I told her to stay away from me but saying all those pains me. Parang ako pa ang mas nasaktan sa sinabi ko. 

Because I don't want to be her friend anymore kung alam ko sa sarili ko na hindi lang yun ang tingin ko sa kanya. Kung siya kaya niya ako hindi. If she can still be my friend even if she admit that she already have feelings for me ako hindi ko kayang gawin yun. 

Dahil mas gugustuhing kong wag maging parte ng buhay niya kung ganun. 

"Ano nangyari?" Gray ask ng makapasok ako ulit ng bar after what happen outside. Umiling lang ako sa kanya at kahit na tinatawag din nila ako hindi ko na lang sila pinansin at umakyat na lang sa second floor ng bar. 

"Casper! Are you okay?" Napapikit na lang ako sa inis at hinarap si Gray. 

"I'm not! How can I be okay if she admit that she have feelings for me but not enough to risk for me. If she is scared na mawala ako sa kanya then be it. I will be gone in her life." I said in frustration at mukhang nakuha naman ni abo kung ano yung sinasabi ko. 

I actually envied Gray for being brave enough na ihandle ang pain sa nangyari sa kanila ni Zaira. He keeps going and do take care of Sheena kahit yun ang naging dahilan bakit siya iniwan.

Pero ako hindi ko kaya, because from the beginning when I'm starting to fall for Raffy and stay with her even if my feelings are already changing tinitiis ko na yung sakit na baka hanggang kaibigan lang talaga ako. 

Yung sakit na kahit na hindi ko siya makuha okay lang as long as she is with me and I thought I can do it until all of my feelings for her is gone pero hindi mas lalo lang akong nahulog and it makes me want her more not just as her friend. 

"Then, respect her decision." I look at Gray and he look serious while looking at me. And what I can see is the broken man that I saw years ago the time when Zaira broke up with him. 

"Even if it's pains me?" Hindi makapaniwalang tanong ko sa kanya at tumango naman siya. 

"Kahit na masakit, respect it. Kahit na pinapatay ka na sa sakit tiisin mo dahil kung mahal mo talaga siya gagawin mo yun." he said at tinalikuran na ako. 

And because of what he said naalala ko na yun pala ang ginawa niya. Respect Zaira's decision kahit na hindi niya pa din maintindihan bakit kailangang mangyari sa kanila ni Zaira yung mga yun. 

I know him hanggang ngayon hindi niya pa din matanggap na mas pinili ni Zaira ang iwan siya it is the same for me now. Dahil hindi ko pa din natatanggap na hanggang kaibigan lang ako kahit na sa umpisa pa lang alam ko na yun. 

And I did what I need to do. I respect her decision. I avoided her kahit na alam kong nasa paligid ko lang siya I did my best to avoid her. But while avoiding her I realize something. 

I will avoid her until she can make the right decision. Even if I can feel that hindi ko matatanggap ang mga desisyong gagawin niya. 

We are here at the restaurant where Zairon propose to Chloe at alam kong kanina pa siya tumitingin sa'kin but I just talk to my bandmates para hindi ko siya matingnan. But when that Liam came that makes me look to her. 

Dahil iba ang tingin niya kay Raffy. So different of how he look to Zaira. 

"At bakit naman nandito ka?" Masungit na tanong ni Raffy that is why I smirk because of that.