The Boy I Once Knew | Cobra Kai Hawk/Eli

Chapter 23

I'm pacing around my bathroom, sweat going down my face, blood-stained around my mouth, playing with my fingers, An anxiety habit I've developed when I was first diagnosed with cancer. I turn the shower and fan on so no one can hear me, the bathroom is right across from my bedroom. I've been in here for almost an hour so I know they're going to catch on soon. I slide down the bathroom door with my knees held to my chest. When will this end? Will I ever be as healthy as some of my friends? Even if I continued to take my medication, I'll never be completely fine. It's a never-ending cycle.

I stand up to look at myself in the mirror. When I see myself all I see is a sick girl who everyone feels bad for. Am I just a joke? Is that why Tory switched how she acted around me because she feels bad for me? Is Hawk only with me because he feels bad for me and doesn't want to be known as the guy who broke up with the sick girl? It's like when Demetri found out about it, he checked up on me then disappeared. Sometimes I think it wasn't only because of Hawk that he left, I was his best friend too. I miss Demetri so much but knowing the stubborn him, he'd never come back to me.

Talking to Cameron tonight was like a breath of fresh air. He doesn't know me, anything about my past and nothing now. He knew me as the girl at the mall.

"Lillian! Come out soon I have something to tell you!" My mom startles me by knocking on the door. I jump and let out a small scream. I can hear her gasp as she opens the door. Her eyes go wide at the sight of my appearance as she runs over to me on the floor.

"Oh my god!" She yells. I sit there in silence not knowing how to explain the state I'm in. She yells so loud that I can hear Hawk rushing out of my bed over to the bathroom along with his mom. He stars at me blankly. My mom pulls me into a hug while Mrs. Moskowitz calls an ambulance. Honestly, I don't need an ambulance. I'm not as bad as I look, but to them, they probably think I'm dying. I look over at Hawk to see tears falling from his eyes with his mouth open in shock. Why do they all look so surprised that this is happening?

Eventually, an ambulance comes and takes me to the nearest hospital which happens to be the same one Miguel is currently at. I get taken to a room with multiple doctors doing different tests and treatments. I don't open my mouth once as they all look at me. My mom isn't in the room, the last time I saw her was in the ambulance. She looked so worried, I felt bad but I didn't say anything. I wasn't going to apologize for keeping it a secret because I knew they wouldn't get it. I just wanted to live a normal life with my friends, not in a hospital bed. The doctors ask everything that has gone on recently so I explain the symptoms I've had. They nod and continue doing what they were doing.

Finally, I get sent to a nice room and I'm by myself. I have needles in my arms with my stats all over machines. I lean up in my bed with tears falling down my cheeks. I guess I never really thought of the possible outcome of this and how everyone else would feel. I only thought that it would be better for me and everyone else wouldn't care after all. Hawk walks into my room with his hair out of a mohawk and his eyes puffy and red. He looks at me and walks over to my bed not saying anything. I move over on the bed signaling for him to get up next to me. He eyes the bed and gets up. He lays his head on my chest and I wrap my arms around him. No one speaks.

Seeing him this way makes it seem like I'm next to Eli again. The sad boy that was bullied for being himself. He was so happy around Demetri and me, he was himself, not afraid to show who he was. Now, he tries to be the person he thinks everyone wants him to be.

The boy with the back tattoo and mohawk.