The Boy I Once Knew | Cobra Kai Hawk/Eli

Chapter 45

Today is the day that I'll probably be admitted. They'll keep me overnight and do millions of tests, push new antibiotics, and surgeries. It's exactly what I didn't want to happen.

"Ready to go?" mom asks. I shake my head no. I'll most likely never be ready. I don't want to live with this pain but at the same time, I want to be normal and live a normal life. Like I've said before they probably think I'm being selfish because I lied about how I feel and what's going on but I'm doing it for myself. Not them. They always tell you to worry about yourself instead of others and that's exactly what I'm doing.

She pulls me into a hug along with her hand on the back of my head. I lean my head down on her shoulder.

"Eli told me what happened last night. This isn't you dear, it's the meds. You know the side effects. There was nothing you could do to prevent it." She cries. That's the exact reason I'm still home. Eli must have told her before I woke up what had happened last night. She felt too bad to send me to school.

I know she worries. Especially with how I deal with this. I know it's not easy for her to be a single parent and deal with this at the same time. The bills, all the doctor appointments, the medications, and chemo treatments. It's a lot.

"Come on. Let's go get this done and over with so we can come back home." She wraps her arm around my back and we walk to the front door together. She opens the door slightly until we Johnny standing there, getting ready to knock.

My mom just smiles at him like she was expecting him. He signals for her to just leave us alone. She nods and lets go of me and johnny takes her place, placing his hand on my back.

"Look kid, I'm sorry for how I reacted last night. He's a bad person and he doesn't deserve to have someone like you in his dojo." He talks while we walk to his minivan. "I want to be a better parent to both you and Robby. I'm coming with you to your appointment and then I'm going to pick up Robby from Juvy later"

I look between him and my mom and just think what my life could be like if everything comes together. But having both my parents won't fix everything in my life. It won't heal me or anything.

"That's great, Johnny. I'm happy for you." I smile at him.

He puts his hand out and helps me into the front seat. He hands me my blanket and pillow while my mom makes her way to my window.

"He'll take you and I'll meet you guys there. I need to take a separate car just in case he needs to leave or go anywhere," she assures me.

I nod and she walks away, getting into her car.

We arrive at the hospital and get signed in, waiting in my room. I go back to get a chest X-ray along with an MRI and Bone scan. I come back to the room and my mom sitting in one chair and Johnny in the other. Mom looks super nervous while he just looks confused. Who knows what's going on inside his head.

While waiting for the doctor to come back my mind goes to Eli. I haven't heard from him at all. The last time we talked was last night. No call, no text, nothing. Maybe he realized he couldn't handle this and well...me. Maybe I pushed him away last night and he took the chance to leave. I don't blame him. I can barely do this myself.

"Good afternoon Ms. Hill and Lillian," Dr. Houstan says. She reaches her hand out to Johnny since she has never met him before.

He quickly stands up, meeting her hand. "John Lawerence, her father" Doc nods and moves on.

"Lillian would you like to be in the room while I tell them the news or would you like me to take them out in the hall?" she asks.

"I want to hear," I say and she nods.

"Ms. Hill and Mr. Lawerence as you know your daughter has stage 2 lung cancer. It is rare for her age to be diagnosed with it this early. Her tumor is currently in stage IIB. In stage IIB, the tumor is 5 centimeters and cancer has spread to the lymph nodes on the same side of the chest as her primary tumor." The doctor turns to face me. "Lillian this is why your medication has not been working and you've had new symptoms. You may experience weight loss, a cough that does not go away, coughing up blood, a Hoarse voice, wheezing, and tiredness." I look over at my mom to see her wiping away the tears coming out of her eyes. Johnny has his hand on his forehead, shaking his head.

"What's the survival rate of stage IIB?" I ask.

"Absolutely not Lillian. She does not want to know" Mom snaps.

"What's the survival rate?" I demand.

Doc lets out a breath, "53%. Most live five years after being diagnosed."

I scoff, "Five years. So what the hell am I supposed to do in those five years"

"You just need to be patient. Continue showing up to your appointments, eat healthily, stay active, don't smoke."She pauses. "Lillian, I've been with you since the beginning, you're a tough girl. Healing isn't going to happen overnight and you need to accept that. You can do this. Just listen to your body. If you continue playing this game and not showing up to your appointments, you're going to make it five months. Do you understand me?" I nod my head yes. "I need you to say it"

"I understand," I say quietly.

"Parents, I need her to stay the next two nights just to make sure she is caught up and reacting well to her new medication. After that, if all is well she is free to go home." They both nod and the doc walks out of the room.

I lay back on the bed and let out a harsh breath that I didn't know I was holding. I have no thoughts or words for how I feel about it.

"Well, how was that for your first doctor's appointment, Johnny?" I laugh.

My mom shakes her head and Johnny stands up, "Theresa can I talk to you in the hall" he asks.

My mom nods and stands up following him but stops at my bed, "This is no joking matter, Lillian. It's serious" she snaps and walks out into the hall.

I groan and turn onto my side, facing the opposite way from the hall. I can't get myself to check my phone and not see his name on my screen. Just to make this day worse, I can't talk to him. If it wasn't for the stupid meds, he could still be here. But he's not.

Five years. Five years will never be enough. It's a time of decaying. I won't have enough energy to do anything but then all I'll want to do is live my life to the fullest. I'll live every day of my life wondering when my last day will be while laying in a bed getting pumped with antibiotics.

I hear someone walk into the room.

"Go away, mom. I don't want to talk" I cry with a scratchy voice.

"Hey," he says softly. I quickly turn onto my back to see my boy standing in the doorway. "I was waiting for you to come out but your mom told me the news and said I could come back"

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a/n- I'm really undecided if I should end the book or keep going. I need opinions lol.

enjoy:)