ET2: Through The Storm

Chapter 9

Crystal Dwight's POV

I rolled over on my bed again and again. I just couldn't fall asleep. When I reach for my phone at the small table at my right, I confirmed that it already passed midnight. I went to bed at 11 but the clock already arrived at 1, I am still wide awake.

I rubbed my face and rise. I went to our small sala, holding a cup of milk with a help that it would make me sleepy. I sat down at the small sofa, made by "kawayan" and began drinking my milk.

Why my mind is kinda chaotic tonight? I still have an exam to take later at 7:30 but I am here, couldn't bring myself to have sleep.

I closed my eyes and pictured out Ryle's image in my mind. Why I thought of him all of the sudden? I hastily opened my eyes but he did not leave my mind. He was still there, vivid. His sterling grey eyes, perfect brows, his tall nose and perfect jawline was created inside my head. Ryle, why are you haunting me at this hour?

I don't know what I really felt. It seemed that feeling but at the same time it was not. But there's one emotion that dominates the others. The feeling of fear. I am afraid. I am afraid that one day, I'll gonna realize that I am already longing for him, his embraces, his smiles, everything about him, even his flaws and imperfections. He is sincere about pursuing me and that what's I am afraid of. Natatakot ako na baka isang araw, magising na lang ako na his name was already become my heart beats.

I grew up without knowing my father. Through the years, I saw mama suffered because of it. Sometimes when I woke up at the middle of the night, I could overhear her sobs. I heard her mumbling that she was hurt but letting go is the only choice that was left for her to choose. Nothing hurts more than seeing my mother crying. She went through a lot. She's suffering both emotionally and physically, fractured feet and a broken heart.

Maybe, this is the reason why there is a fear inside my heart. I am afraid to get attached with a man and turned out to be like my papa who just leave mama behind. I have never been in a relationship. Siguro, kaya dati hanggang paghanga lang ako dahil may takot sa puso, takot na masaktan ako. I am already too broke on just seeing my mama having a breakdown, I don't want to experience the same thing and takes my mother's pain to the next level. Hindi ko gustong madagdagan ang bigat na dinadala ni mama dahil sa akin.

"Zy, may sagot ka na sa tanong ni Ms. Alli?" I asked and seated at the vacant seat next to her.

She smiled and handed over a piece of bond paper. "Here, oh. For me community is a home. Home of people with diverse personalities but unite as one for the betterment of the community."

"Magkalapit pala tayo ng sagot. Mine is. . . I looked for my sheet where I wrote my assessment. "We are all have disparities but with community, unity exist. We truly exist in a community when have that love for everyone."

"Wow!" Oo nga!"

"Ipapasa na lang 'to kay Ms. Alli, 'di ba?"

"Yeah," she replied.

"Can you pass it for me, Zy?" I gave her back her paper together with mine.

"Huh? Bakit, Dwight? May duty ka pa, 'di ba?"

"Naka-report na ako sa library kaninang umaga," I stated.

"Okay. Okay. Ako na bahala rito." She accepted our papers with a smile.

"Xiexie, Zyie!" I rose from my seat and gave her a quick hug.