No return

Chapter 6

I decided to reach my hand out again, this time closer to his forehead. Tommy flinched, hard. I was bent between feeling anger twords whoever changed my rambunctious little brother, or sadness twords the fact Tommy thought I was going to hurt him. I don't understand what happens to him to change him this much. This was a while 180 flip to what I'm used to. And I would be lying if I said it didn't scare me.

I decided to go with anger, which I guessed shown on my face, because he only looked more scared.

"I'm not..." I sigh a bit trying to calm down a little "I'm not mad at you." I say and he relaxes just a little be. Only a little though.

He looked like a cornered puppy, it was rather pitiful. It made me feel like I had to protect my little brother from the world around us. I reached my hand out again, and finally got to his forehead without him backing away. I don't think I would feel better till he was back to the way he was before.

I thought back to all the times as kids he got on my nerves for being loud or obnoxious. I wish we could go back to this. That was a whole lot better then quite and scared. I'm starting to think anything is. I came back to reality to my hand feeling his temperature and his eyes squeezed shut.

His forehead was hot.

To hot to be safe.

I rose up and climbed down the ladder to get a bucket of cool water and a wash rag for his head. I guess I left more poison then originally thought. The voices, finally deciding to perk up, screamed at me for it. It was starting to all blend together and get to be a little too much, but I couldn't focus on that right now. I needed my full attention to getting Tommy better.

I know I didn't do it right.  I tried to reason, but they seemed uninterested in what I had to say. So, with I sigh I made it back up to the room. I was used to the ladder at this point and it was a whole lot easier to bring the bucket up. I held the thing in my mouth as I climbed. Some got on my shirt but yet again I had other things to worry about.

Tommy still sat there, shaking. He opened his mouth to say something, but immediately closed it, as if scared to speak. I added it to the list of things that were wrong, a list I wish I didn't have to make let alone have it grow anymore.

"What do you have to say" I asked, as calmly as I could. While placing the bucket down I place the cloth in it and get it wet.

"I- I'm c- c- cold" he said, stuttering through both fear and chattering through his teeth. I guess it makes sense with the fever plauging his body. I look around and realize the thing I laid on him last time was a little ways away on the floor. I reached into the bucket, grabbed the rag, and ignored the flinching as I gently placed it on his sweaty forehead.

After I went over to the closet in the corner of the room and grabbed another blanket, and spread it out over him, making sure to also lay the other one for more layers. That seemed to help a little as he settled back into the mattress. I barely noticed the small thank you that escapes his lips as he drifts off ones again.

With that all taken care of I was able to take care of myself. I grab the clothes from my drawers and make my way back downstairs. Also trying to dull down the concerns and yelling happening in my head right now. It was nice to have that be normal compared to the almost stranger in my brother's body right now.

I took care of it for now. I think as I start making some potatoes for myself. I hear something of a good and do better from them. I just scoff and roll my eyes as go back to the pan. While those cook I start making a cup of tea, that seems to help both me and them calm down.

It's not much longer till I sit down at the table across the way from the couch and dig in. It tastes good and I feel as my shoulders relax a little. I never noticed just how tense I was before. Maybe I'm growing soft. No, I need to be soft. For his sake. I can't have him scared of me, it could make things worse. And god knows that's the last thing that either of us needs right now.