static [joshler]

exhaustive lust

Fatigue took over his life like a fish caught in a net. He could see it in the distance and always knew it was there but it suddenly trapped him. The teen dealt with fatigue before but this was to a new extreme. Tyler didn't leave his spot on the couch for two days, too sick and drowsy to go up to his room. Josh never left his side either. On the third day, he ate a proper meal and said a few words before going back to sleep. The fourth day he had made it up the stairs.

Josh wasn't sure if he could ever make it back down.

Jenna had paid off the hospital bills, and the extra money that she had saved was almost completely gone. Debby and Josh had given some money for the bill, a small chunk, but they provided it nonetheless.

At the beginning of the fifth day back from the emergency room, Josh got to wake up next to his boyfriend again. Even though the bed was smaller again, now that he returned, Josh missed cuddling with him

"Good morning." He whispered.

Tyler peeled one brown eye open. "Hm."

"How you doing?"

"Mm." He closed it again.

"In any pain?"

"Mm- only little."

"Hey, that's good." He patted his shoulder. "It's much better, right?"

"Mhm." He confirmed.

"Morphine makes you drowsy, though... It works too good, huh?" He attempted to crack a joke, "It makes you a party pooper."

Tyler didn't do anything.

Josh tapped on his arm. "Hey. You hear me?" The dying boy opened both his eyes this time. "Morphine makes you a party pooper."

"Mh." The hum was short, sounding like he was acknowledging that it was funny.

Josh wasn't sure though.

"Okay." He sighed. "Seems like you just wanna relax... I'll shut up."

Tyler moved his hand to rest on his boyfriend's face. It had taken a lot of energy and took more just to say, "I-I wanna date you longer."

"Me too." Josh rested a hand over Tyler's.

The younger took a moment before speaking again. "Wanna go on a date and... spend time with you. Do something fun..."

"Well, we could consider when we went to the fair a date. We spent time together and it was fun."

"Hm... yeah."

"But I know what you mean. A real one. Go to a restaurant or something..."

"...Can't."

"I know you can't... At least we can be with each other here."

Josh couldn't look away from him, feeling like he would disappear if he did. He was a little skinnier now, seeing more of his cheekbones, and had permanent eye bags. But Josh couldn't stop watching.

"You can... you can date someone else."

"What?" Josh asked. "Why would I do that?"

"You have your whole life. Years later..."

"Tyler..." He squeezed his hand still lying on his face. "I don't want to date anyone else."

"But... when you move on. It's okay."

"I..." Josh struttered. "I'm not gonna do that."

"You can't date me when-" A cough erupted from the dying boy and he retracted his hand to put over his chest. He wheezed out for a few seconds, not being very attractive. His eyes struggled to stay open. "Uh... I-I'll be gone an-and..."