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—TOM TRIED NOT TO SHOW THE FACT THAT HIS HEART SKIPPED A BEAT WHEN RIGEL WALKED IN, WEARING A SUIT. Rigel had just came back from somewhere he had gone with Sirius, who also walked in, wearing a suit as well.
Rigel grimaced when Sirius kissed Remus on the lips, earning a chuckle from the two men.
"Bubba!"
Rigel's eyes immediately softened. He smiled slightly when she hugged his leg. "Hello, sweetheart."
••
"Rigel?" asked Tom in shock as he walked into Rigel's room.
He had just walked in on Rigel.. crying.
Tom had seen Rigel shed a few tears before, but never had he seen him sobbing like he was doing right now.
"Get out. Please." murmured Rigel, not bothering to even look at him.
Tom didn't listen to him and walked over to him. "Let's go stargaze."
Rigel blinked, looking at him. "Stargaze?"
"Yes." shrugged Tom as if it was obvious. "Come on, I want to go stargaze."
"Tom, it's literally 2AM."
"Exactly. Perfect time to look at the stars, let's go."
••
As the two reached the rooftop of the manor, they both simultaneously looked at the many stars in the sky.
They both walked to the edge of the rooftop, neither of them talking, feeling peace in comfortable silence.
"You wanna talk about it?" whispered Tom, giving a side-glance to the 16-year-old.
Rigel shrugged. "A bit, I guess."
"Go ahead, I'm listening."
"I feel alone even in a room filled with people. I feel unloved even when Remus and Sirius are the affectionate parents they are. It's frustrating, really." admitted Rigel in a quiet voice, as if he had been keeping it inside for years. "The feeling of hopelessness and worthlessness just makes everything worse."
Tom smiled softly, not looking at the boy in pity at all, knowing that he didn't want that. "And after all that; you're surviving."
"Yes, but only just."
"All that matters in the end is that you're here." said Tom, looking at the boy, who had his eyes stuck on the stars. "Stay."
Rigel looked away from the sky and looked at him in confusion. "Stay?"
"I know you feel like you've got no reason to hold on sometimes, but you've got loads. However, I'm not going to ask you to stay for me or for your sister or your guardians.." Tom's eyes didn't leave his, "I'm asking you to stay for yourself."
"Myself?"
"Yourself. You've got to put yourself first sometimes, Rigel, and now is the best time. Stay for yourself. I don't deserve you. Nobody does... you, however, deserve yourself. The version of yourself that you've lost." Tom said with a soft smile,
"Rigel, you owe yourself happiness. You owe yourself many things, but the biggest thing you owe to yourself is the enjoyment of life. You owe yourself something worth living for. And you know what's worth living for? Seeing yourself smile in the mirror after getting ready for an event. Seeing yourself grow into the person you always wanted to be... Seeing yourself win this battle you have with your mental illness, Ri.."
Rigel didn't even try to stop the smile growing on his face. "Didn't know you could give such deep talks, Tom."
"Only for you, Rigel." whispered Tom, looking back at the stars.
••
An hour later, the two were still on top of the rooftop, looking at the stars and talking.
"Tell me what it's like to rule."
Tom looked thoughtful. "As much power I have, some still dare to be rude to me. Amusing, really."
"I'm rude to you." said Rigel with a hint of amusement in his voice.
"Have you ever thought of why I didn't bother stopping you?"
"Because you deserve it?"
Tom let out a soft laugh, making Rigel's heart skip a beat. "Yes, and because I simply enjoy it."
"Even if I hate you?"
Tom looked at Rigel, who was already looking at him. "Do you hate me?"
Rigel stayed quiet, wanting nothing more than to say 'yes'... but he didn't want to lie.
Not anymore.
"..I hate how you make me feel."
Tom looked curious. "You hate not being alone? You're really confusing, Ri."
"Sure. That." nodded Rigel, not wanting to say what he actually had in mind.
••
"Which one's Rigel, again?" asked Tom about an hour later, still on the rooftop with the boy.
Rigel looked at the sky, not noticing how Tom's eyes lightened up when he started smiling and pointing to a constellation.
"And which one's Sirius?" asked Tom, not looking away from Rigel. Not even once.
"That." said Rigel, pointing to it.
"Which one's your favorite constellation or star, anyway?" Tom questioned, actually curious.
"I don't have a favorite." shrugged Rigel. "They're all special in their own ways."
Tom nodded, agreeing with him.
A sky full of stars and he was staring at the boy next to him.
