i was held at gunpoint while writing this so ig enjoy jerrie but they're cishet
In a perfect world, Jaden wouldn't call himself "J-Dog," Lenny wouldn't be growing a beard and Pez would have finished his work by now, but no.
The world isn't perfect, it's shit and most of all he was an inch away from flinging himself off a cliff so he could escape the two lads.
They're a walking headache that comes and goes and frankly, he's sick of them!
But can he get rid of them? No.
Has he tried? Yes, even left the two to drive themselves home from South Shields to London at one point— did he get rid of them? No.
They appeared on his doorstep a few hours later asking him if he had any dinner.
And no matter how many times he says that he's over them and that he wants them out of his life it's... it's always a lie.
Because as cheesy as it sounds, Pez could never see himself doing and accomplishing all his dreams without those two morons by his side. They were his family. And they were bound to him forever.
You might ask, though, "What's so bad about them that he calls them a headache?"
Well, for starters, you have Lenny.
He was a decent lad, yeah. Pays his bills on time, doesn't leave the toilet seat up, washes after himself; he's alright.
How is he a headache, then? Well, he does party a lot.
And he's loud. Like really loud.
It's the "neighbors complain of how loud you are," type of loud.
He blasts music from his room like only he could hear it when in reality Pez could be driving from a block away with his windows rolled up and he could still hear it.
Lenny was also just loud, you know, as a person. He yells like a girl and it's not like Pez has an issue with that it's just so weird hearing a grown man yell when there's a fly nearby.
Now that we're finished with him, we move to Jaden, or, as he calls himself, J-Dog.
He was a wholesome person, to be honest, something you wouldn't expect from a guy that's tatted up from the neck down but he was really nice, once you get to know him, at least.
Pez has five main issues with him; one, he's messy. Like, yeah, it's cool that he bakes stuff for them but he's messy. And he's nearly burned the kitchen more times than they could count.
Two, he calls himself J-Dog.
He's quite a hoarder, a bit annoying with the amount of competitiveness stuck inside his little body and well, he's pretty stern, especially with Pez.
The blonde gets that he truly is just concerned for him but there were times that he wished that Jaden would just... disappear. But when he's gone, he can't help himself but find him and seek comfort from him.
He's always been his comfort blanket of some sort.
The two annoy him so much but he couldn't really wake up and not find them making a mess in the kitchen in an attempt to make him breakfast to thank him for probably driving them somewhere or for fixing their stuff.
"I can't believe you're inviting women to our flat." Pez mumbles, massaging his temples as he glares at the shorter lad, Lenny forces a smile, scratching the back of his head, "Leigh-Anne is literally... My cousin..."
"She's fine but she's taking her friends with her, isn't she?" The blonde mutters, crossing his arms as Jaden shrugs, leaning on Pez, poking his jaw, "It's just for a week. What's so bad about that?"
