THE GIRL I KNEW

40. FOR GOOD.

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ANDRÉ’S POV:

“What are you—”

“SHIT! A-André, why—why d—d..didn’t you knock first?” She was standing near the wardrobe coughing hardly as she hid her left hand that contained the substance while waving the other hand in the air to chase away the blue smoke.

“You-You actually smoke.” I walked to her as the nicotine penetrated my nostrils.

Her eyes were so puffy and at the same time, they were completely bloodshot. I could see her body was shaking uncontrollably as I strolled to her.

“N-No—”

“Don’t lie to me. You fucking told me that night and now you’re doing it. What the hell?!” I couldn’t help but raise my voice. “Do you have any idea of what you’re doing to yourself?!”

“Don’t shout at me!” I saw the fury ignite in her. “You—You don’t know what I go through! Tequila probably hates me! As a matter of fact, the entire world wishes I was dead! Even you hate me.” She glared. “If my lungs haven’t caught fire all these years, what fucking makes you think it will now?!”

“You have no idea how lucky you are to be alive right now.” I shook my head in disappointment. “It’s clear you’re already an addict.”

“Oh wowwwww, thank you for your words. And like Laura normally says, ‘At least I haven’t died! You see, God is watching’!” She laughed maniacally.

I snatched the stick from her hand and threw it on the floor then with all the anger I felt at that moment, I stomped on it which warranted an outburst from her.

“WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!”

“What’s wrong with me?! What’s the hell is fucking wrong with you! Why the fuck are you smoking?! For God’s sake that shit is dangerous! Did you mix it with something else?!”

“Rebotar and Heroine.” She admitted sluggishly.”

“DO YOU WANT TO KILL YOURSELF GABRIELLA?! Huh?!” I shook her shoulders vigorously. “Do you have any idea how deadly that is?! How long have you been smoking it in here?!”

“For two hours straight. I—I brought a pack with me.”

My hands fell from her shoulders and I slumped myself to the bed. My elbows rested before my knees as I bowed my face into my palms.

“I—I don’t know how you are still alive and being able to stand there but, all I know is that I’m forever grateful to God because, the last thing that I wanted was to walk in here and seeing you lifeless on the floor. Do you know why I’m saying this? That mixture you did was for sure supposed to kill you. And you said you bought a fucking pack, meaning you’ve probably finished it. That an overdose. How are you still standing?” It was taking me everything not to break. My voice was so low and at the verge of cracking.

“I don’t know. I’ve dealt with so many drugs so I guess my body is used to it.” She laughed with enough intoxication in her.  “God is watching so, I won’t die.” She quoted what Laura said that night, followed by a humorless chuckle and a flash of pain in her eyes.

“You won’t die huh?!” I rose up and so did my temper. “But what if you do?! What if you even did right now if I didn’t come in. I’m pretty sure this is your first time doing this. Once we reach Italy, I promise you that I’m going straight to Uncle Nathan and telling him about this! I can’t just sit down and let you try and kill yourself! Not under my watch or anyone else’s! You are so selfish Gabriella! You only care about yourself and not others! You don’t care if everyone will go through pain and suffering if one day your body can’t stand it anymore and then....it happens! You just care about the feeling you’ll get and that’s all! What about us huh?! What about me?! Has it ever crossed your mind what Tequila will go through and become if—if one day...YOU....YOU DIE?! What the hell do you think will happen to her?!”