Regret

Why? (Sana)

I was pacing around the school, wondering what the hell had just happened.

Why would she act like that? What the hell is her deal?? I saved her damn life and she shoves me for it! What the hell!

I couldn't, for the life of me, comprehend what the girl's deal was. And why did she start crying? Was it because I saved her? No that couldn't possibly be the answer.

The only way for me to know was to actually get the information out of her. But first, I needed to find her. Maybe if she told me what the hell her deal was all of this shit would end.

"Naroi," I call out. "I need help finding Edith."

"How come?" He asked, teleporting in front of me.

I still despised him for what he's done to me, but he's the only one that can track Edith.

"I just need to ask her a few questions. That's all, but I want to ask them now."

"Alright then."

I follow him down to the mall and into the food court where I spot the girl I was looking for sitting at a table by herself.

I walk over to her as the strange cat disappears.

"Oh great, I told you to leave me alone."

"Not until you answer my question."

The girl rolls her eyes.

"Seriously? You as well?? Your damn friend was the same exact way!"

"Why did you overreact when I saved you?"

She didn't answer. Instead she got up from her seat and started walking away. I followed after.

"What the hell is your problem?" I ask.

She stops in her tracks and turns to face me.

"My problem is that you only did it for yourself! You saved me to mock me! You think you're a damn hero now just because you could destroy a powerful monster and I couldn't. Screw off."

"That's not why I saved you! I saved you because you were hurt! I told you before that I want to make sure no one is killed by a tristitia ever again! Or at least try to prevent as many tristitia deaths as possible."

The girl walks up to me. Her red eyes piercing into my golden ones.

"I'm not a damn idiot. You got that? The end goal of you doing this is for a selfish reason, it's all for yourself."

I let out an angry sigh and shrug.

"You know what? Fine. I can't freaking argue with you. I wanted to ask if something was wrong, because with the way you're acting something definitely is, but since you want to be bitch about it while I'm just here to talk, then so be it. Just know this, I will never stop saving others from those horrible monsters. I'll slay every last one of them to make sure people are safe, even if it's just you, saving one life makes a huge difference."

The girl looks like she's about to say something but instead shakes her head and continues walking away.

I begin walking away as well, going in the opposite direction.

I spent the whole day fighting trisitias. I haven't seen Kate at all. She could've been avoiding me, and if she was, I wouldn't blame her. I would avoid me too if I heard someone say such horrible things.

When morning hit the next day, I got ready for school and walked into class by myself. Kate was there but she didn't acknowledge me. She seemed depressed even.

As school finished I ran and caught up with her.

"Kathleen wait!" I shout.

She stops and looks at me, clearly not enjoying my presence.

"What do you want? Something happen to you and you're here to tell me that it's my fault?

"What? No! Of course not, I just want to know why you've been avoiding me."

"Well let's see...I thought Gretchen's death was all my fault, that I was too much of a damn coward to make a stupid wish. And here you are, my own freaking best friend, saying how all your damn problems are my fault and then confirming Gretchen's death is indeed due to me being too damn afraid to do anything, even after all I did was try to help and comfort you after what happened. Do you realize how much that shit hurt?"

She pauses, tears beginning to pour out of her eyes. Her breathing becoming heavy and broken.

"But despite all that, you're still my best friend...and even if what you said hurt me so much that I don't think I could ever forgive you for it, I still care about you...I just..I just need to be alone right now."

"I...alright, I'll give you some space, but please come talk to me when you're ready."

She gives me a single nod then heads back to our dorm while I go look for some tristitias.

I remember what I said before. How I said practicing wouldn't do me any good. But that was back then. Now is different.

Now, I don't care about myself, or rather, I don't care about myself more than others. I want to be a selfless magica, one who puts others before me, no matter what.

I mean after I hurt Kathleen, my best friend, I have to make up for it.

I fight as many tristitias as I can. It doesn't matter if they're easy or difficult to defeat. A tristitia is a tristitia, and they must be slayed.

It was getting late when I finished, so I decided to buy a quick snack and drink at the local convenience store.

I bought myself a bag of nacho cheese flavored bugles and a bottle of red gatorade.

When I came out of the store, the same girl from before, Edith, came walking towards me.

"You here to talk or complain?" I ask.

"Let's say you did 'save' me because you wanted to be nice and didn't want me to suffer," She begins. "Cause if you did then...then I don't know what the hell to tell you! I..."

She lets out a sigh as she sits down with her back against the wall of the store.

"I just don't understand, I can't freaking understand! Why? What made you decide to save someone like me?" She snarled, her eyes tearing up a bit.

"I told you, I don't want anyone to die from a tristitia, I don't care if I hate the person or love them, they don't deserve such a death."

I stop, walking closer to the girl and kneeling in front of her.

"Besides. Even if I do hate you and find you unbearable, I couldn't just let that tristitia torture you like that. You were in so much pain. I couldn't let it kill you."

Edith was about to say something, when she shook her head, giving a pissed off gaze with teary red eyes.

Then she shoves me and runs away once again.

Why is it so damn hard for her to comprehend what happened? She literally asked me the same damn question. What the hell is wrong with her?

But more importantly...why was she crying?