Wonder if....

Season 3 (Passing Notes)

An:Question of the day: Is anyone excited for the ending? (You don't have to answer if you are not comfortable, its okay!)

Y/N:
I walked with Anne and Diana, they were ranting on how Gilbert didn't say anything but I tried my best to stay quiet. Talking about it would do nothing to help me make my peace with it.

"Y/N?" I looked over to Anne who was looking at me expectantly "Did I miss something?" "Aren't you excited to be roomates with us?" she asked excitedly looking from me to Diana.

"We hope we'll be roomates at least" I shoved her elbow a bit.

"We'll all get there Diana, be optimistic." she raised her eyebrow at me "You? Optimistic?" we all let out a laugh and I shook my head "It can happen sometimes, thank you Diana".

The mood turned solem again "I doubt my parents will allow it" Diana spoke sadly.

"They will see how happy you would be, you'll get there I'm sure of it." we came to the fork in the path.

"Are you sure you don't need us to come with you?" Anne asked she nodded "With that then, we'll be off" Anne spoke "and remember, its your future not theirs." I nodded before turning around to follow Anne.

I truly hope it goes well for her, it would be unimaginable to be in college without, we haven't talked the most but she has always been so kind and supportive, she deserves the world.

I mad emy way back to the house, Anne and I had parted with a hug, we both had things to prepare for college, even though it is still some time away we should do as much as we can to be ready.

I walked in and sat down,  Stacy came in not a moment later "I'm proud of you" I looked up to see her glassy eyes and I smiled slightly, "No reason to be so sad Stacy, I'll still visit you." she nodded and came over to sit down next me on the couch.

"I know bit it will be different without you and your adventures" she pulled me into a tight hug. "It will be hard but we'll make it, and then I'll be a writer and travel the world and bring you international gifts." she chuckled lightly and pulled away.

"I think its time for a good rest, we'll start doing things for college tomorrow" I nodded and she stood, sending me a smile before leaving the room, I closed my eyes and settled in for a good sleep and one that wouldn't be filled with thoughts of a certain someone.

                                                                                                                                   ***

Gilbert:
Iwent up to knock on the door, waiting for any kind of answer but getting none, I walked in slowly. She had told me I could a few months back if I ever needed to, and even in our situation now I hoped that still applied.

"Hello? Hello?" I looked around in the rooms but when I saw no one I took the pen from my pocket and set it gently on the table.

I turned, ready to leave but I stopped in my tracks, turning back to the paper and pen that sat layed out on the table, I hesitated for just a minute before picking the pen up and moving the paper closer to me.

I thought I would have to think for the words to come to me but they seemed rather simple to come up with after thinking them for so long, after practiacally fawning over her for at least three years, every thought from all that time seemed to come pouring out of me.

I took the pen to the paper and wrote: "Dear Y/N, Since we are parting ways perhaps forever, I feel I must unburden my heart and mind. You are the fond person of my affection and my desire. You, and you alone, are the keeper of the key to my heart. Please don't be startled, I don't expect your favor, but I can't in good conscience not reveal myself. I'm not engaged, not will I be, unless its to you, Y/N. It always has been, and always will be... you. With love, your good doctor. P.S. Thanks for the pen. Good luck at Queens.".

I set it on her favorite book, the only reason I knew that was because of how often I would see her reread it and how worn the pages had now become, it was also the top of the stack so hopefully she would find it here.

I made sure to put her name on it before finally walking away, this could be the last time I see her in Avonlea, she would succeed in whatever her endevors were and she would leave to write her stories.

The pain stung through my heart as I thought of that possibility, I knew I wouldn't be truly happy with anyone else, I think when you find the one thats it, no second chances and she is the one for me.

I screwed up when I couldn't figure my feelings out quick enough and now I may never recover from that, I could have had my ideal life with the only person who would complete it but I had to go and ruin it.

I know if she were here then she would being telling me that it is no ones fault and deep down I know that but I can't really be mad at the universe so for now this will have to do.

Y/N:
"That man was ridiculous!" I exclaimed as I walked in with Stacy at my heel. "I know, he was so rude." she commented, a man at the store had told me women couldn't ware trousers and let me tell you, I had a few 'choice words' for him, as Stacy likes to call it.

I sat down in a heap, I took a deep breath trying to calm myself down, I stood to get a sip of water but accidentaly tripped over my pile of books laying beside the couch.

I really need to move those, they are clearly a tripping hazard, I stood and brushed the front of my dress of before bending down and picking the books up from the pile.

When I did, a small piece of paper fell from the stack, I looked down at it confused before picking it up, I mean it was adressed to me so I might as well read it.

I picked it up and set it on the table while I grabbed the pitcher of lemon water Stacy had just made and took a glass from the cabinet to use.

I brought it to the table and set the glass down, I began to pour but I got bumped into from behind me "Oh, sorry dear." I waved her off but when I looked back torwards the table it was drenched.

"Oh silly me, I'll go grab some rags. One moment." I didn't focus on her words as I watched the ink run from the page and it began to tear, "Dammit" I tried to pick it up but it was no use, the paper tore down the middle and if I even tried to read it then the ink would stain my hands.

I let out a heavy sigh, I guess that wasn't meant to be read after alk, I took the note or lack there of and threw away the scraps before helping Stacy clean the water from the table and the ground.

I went back to the couch, what if... that note... maybe it was from him.

Why would he leave a note though, certainly not to tell me he loves me or something, he would do that inperson, or at least wait until he saw me, maybe it was a wedding invitation.

Just the thought had my blood boiling, if he gave me a wedding invitation... you know what? I need to talk to Anne and then we would go to Diana to get her take and see how it went with her parents, yep another great plan, maybe I;m really not the best with them sometimes but right now is not a time to question that.

I grabbed my boots and sprinted over, would this lead to anything or help? Probably not, but did I need to vent? Hell yes, and Anne was always a good person to do that too and since Gilbert was clearly not getting my point then at least I would talk to people who did.

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An: 1420 Words! I'm sorry if this one doesn't
make as much sense, I was a little
distracted! As always leave
any questions, suggwstions,
comments, or
concerns! I
hope you
enjoyed
this chapter!
Happy
Reading
Bookworms!