Please Don't Go (The Story of Us Book 3)

Chapter 18- Just Like Old Times

3rd Person P.O.V.

Most people would assume that, because of Amanda's high IQ, when she was a little girl all she was interested in was something like quantum mechanics or college-level calculus. Those people would be wrong. Living in a house where she was constantly afraid that every step or move would be a misstep that would get her hurt, it isn't a foreign concept for her to crave a life from a fairytale. In fairytales, the princesses always lived happily ever after, and more than anything, that's what Amanda wanted. To finally be happy.

Maybe that's why she fell for Spencer so quickly. From the moment she met him, he was always so kind to her. She had grown up never being able to feel safe, but Spencer was the epitome of safety in her eyes. He wasn't the type of person you picture when envisioning the knight in shining armor or the prince who rides to the princess's castle and gives her true love's kiss to save the day. In fact, Amanda was almost positive that if Spencer Reid tried to ride a horse, he would fall off.

That didn't matter to Amanda, however, because in her eyes Spencer Reid was perfect. He didn't need to be tanned and toned or the captain of the football team. She never wanted him to be anything but himself and he never expected anything but her in return. They were perfect together because everywhere Amanda's personality lacked Spencer was there to fill it in and she loved him for that. She loved that he always seemed to make the bad things go away.

She knew that he was worried about her after her depressive episode. It was evident from the look in his eyes in every case they worked since she got back. Amanda wanted to fix it. More than anything she craved a way to ease the tension she knew he felt about the situation but it felt like trying to pluck a star out of the sky. Just like in the story Emily had told them. Sure, Amanda knew that they thought she wasn't listening because she had her earbuds in, but that was what she wanted Spencer to think.

But something changed that day on the jet and try as she might, Amanda couldn't figure out what. Spencer seemed lighter, as though he were Atlas and suddenly, somebody had volunteered to take the weight of the sky upon their own shoulders to give him a break. When they had walked off the jet and headed back to Amy's mansion, he seemed happier somehow and she was worried that it was going to be temporary.

Which is why, when she wakes up the following morning, she snuggles closer into him, hoping to fall back asleep and bask in the bliss just a little bit longer. "Good morning, Angel," Spencer's scratchy morning voice speaks. Amanda hums and clings to him tightly.

"I don't want to wake up," she complains and Spencer chuckles.

"Why not, sweetheart?"

"Because if we wake up, then things are going to go back to how they were. You're going to walk on eggshells around me and I'm going to bite my tongue because I know you're doing it out of love," she responds, attributing her honesty to the sleep that was still muddling her brain.

"What if we don't go back to that?" He whispers in her ear. "What if we go back to how it was before?" This grabs her attention and she pulls away and looks into his eyes.

"Really? You mean it?" He grins at her brightly and it catches onto her face as she squeals and attacks him with a hug. You'd think that she was a kid being told they were going to Disneyworld rather than an adult being told that her boyfriend was comfortable with her mental health again. But she can't help the joy that is flooding her veins. She hated the thought that she was causing the only person who had ever made her feel safe to worry that she would hurt herself and he would lose her forever.

"It can be just like old times," he vows and Amanda grins, throwing her leg over his body so that she's straddling him.

"Oh but I thought you wanted things to be different than old times," she whispers into his ear as she grabs his arms and moves them above his head, and holds them there with her own. She watches as his pupils become blown with lust and begins to feel him stirring beneath her. "So, do you want things to be different?" He nods his head furtively and Amanda gives an over-exaggerated frown. "I can't understand you, baby. If you don't speak up, I might have to punish you."