You Are My Wildest Dream

A Fragile Little Flame (Hannah's POV)

HANNAH'S POINT OF VIEW

Tell me why every time something so good and new starts I immediately begin to worry with fear that tomorrow it'll be ripped from my hands. That the enjoyment and pleasure I'm feeling right now will disappear in hours, and I'll be left all alone, yet again. All the things I love sometimes feel so far away from me; it's torture and drives me mad. And the thing is, sometimes the situation will stay the exact same way, full of so much love and light, but my fears creep in and I turn delusional. I resume fights that were never even there, I "notice" changing characteristics; I see it all before it crashes and burns, so I can be the one to make it crash and burn first.

The controller.

The predictor.

The ruiner.

Rowan is fast asleep in my arms, probably having the sweetest dreams. In fact, I know she is because as I look down to study her face I see the most precious faint smile across her lips. Oh, to be normal. Here I am, after having one of the best nights of my life with one of the best people I've ever met, and now I could cry from fear.

I let my mind reminisce on how amazing the last few hours were with her. The talking, the kissing, our bodies fitting like a puzzle. I see all of these moments playback in my brain and all I can hear creeping out is, "Love's a fragile little flame, it can burn out."

It can burn out.

I gently take my arm out from underneath Rowan to prop myself up in bed. The only thing that really "calms me down", if that's even the right phrase to explain the slight relief I get, is writing. I pick up my phone from the bedside table and turn the brightness down. I immediately begin typing and let our moments from the night present themselves in poetry:

You stand with your hand on my waistline

Hmmmmm...

Baby, I know places we won't be found

Yeahhhh, and??

Just grab my hand and don't ever drop it, my love

But...

Love's a fragile little flame, it could burn out

It could burn out

I feel satisfied with some of the lyrics I've written out, and can even start to already hear the melody. I start tapping my hand onto my leg to try and play it out while whispering the lyrics to go with it. Mid mini-jam session, I feel Rowan start to move. "Hey," She says in a sleepy tone with her eyes closed. "You're still awake, how come? You scared of the storm?" She asks and flips over to spoon me. "Yeah, a little," I respond with a lie, but it's not fully a lie; our togetherness might become a storm. "I'm here, it's going to be okay, I promise," Rowan assures, as I feel her tuck a piece of my hair behind my ear, then kisses my cheek. In a few moments, I can hear her breathing lightly and know she's fallen back asleep. I just hope she's right.