Some Say (Jean Kirstein X Reader)

Chapter Thirty Three

The night has fallen and I'm exhausted as I reach the camp. I fasten my gear to me, it's not like I need to fight titans anymore though. A small wave of sadness washes over me at the thought. Everything we have fought for over the years seems so pointless now.

A Survey Corps member suddenly stops me, aiming their gun at me. I cross my arms over my chest and look the recruit up and down.

"State your business." He demands.

"Was the message not passed along to the lackeys?" I ask.

The man looks offended at my comment. "You have three seconds to start talking before I fire."

Levi appears right on cue, shooting a dirty look at the man. He quickly lowers his gun, his face filled with embarrassment.

"I made it clear that (l/n) would be joining us this evening. Are you simply deaf or dumb?" Levi snarls at the man.

"Please forgive me, Captain. I forgot."

Levi rolls his eyes before looking at me. "Sounds like someone else I know."

I'm gobsmacked. "Excuse me, I'm not that bad."

"Maybe not anymore but you're yet to prove that." He motions for me to follow him. "What brings you out here anyway? I thought you'd be glued to Kirstein's side."

"I have some things I would like to discuss with you," I say, following after him.

He raises an eyebrow as he leads me further into the camp. "And it couldn't wait until I got back?"

I shake my head. "From what I've learnt over the years is to never leave anything unsaid because you don't know if you're ever going to see that person again."

Levi pauses and looks at me. There is sadness in his eyes. "I know what you mean."

I step forward and place a hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry."

He shakes his head. "No need to be sorry. Erwin made that decision for humanity. There was nothing anyone could say to change his mind."

I look further into the forest, there is a dim light flickering. "He was always so hard-headed in his decisions."

"Just like you. They told me what happened. You chose to fight Reiner in your titan form, weakening you."

"I will never forgive myself for that choice I made that day. If I could go back, maybe-"

"Maybe nothing. Everything happens for a reason whether it is fair or not." Levi interrupts.

"It wasn't fair on you or Hanji," I say softly. "I'm so sorry."

"You were stupid. When you didn't arrive with the others I knew something bad had happened. Kirstein was a bitter mess and wouldn't look at anyone."

"I will never be able to apologise enough for the mistakes I made that day."

Levi pulls me in for a hug. Something he has never really done before. I'm stunned into silence as he embraces me.

"No matter your mistakes in the past, I'm glad to have you back fighting with us." He pulls away, straightening himself out. "Knowing that you're alive and well is all that matters to me."

My eyes start to get a little glassy but I won't allow myself to cry here. "You're getting soft with old age, Levi."

His face drops back into its regular scowl. "You don't speak of this ever."

"Yes, Captain." I laugh. "I have one request for you if that's okay?"

"I'm listening."

"I want you to properly meet my son. That day you rescued us wasn't enough. I want him to meet the man that helped raise and train me."