♔52 Hz♚ || 𝐊. 𝐓𝐁 𝐱 𝐌!𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

26 || Twenty Six

I'M MISSING YOU AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO

Kageyama

A week has passed, I never had the chance to talk to (Y/N).

I miss you a lot, I really do.

You've been barely attending class... I hope you're doing alright.

Have you eaten? Are you taking care of yourself? Do you miss me too?

These questions are circling my mind on a daily basis.

I sighed as I just rested my head on my desk.

Winter is nearing so most of the students are now wearing long sleeves and winter clothes, I hope (Y/N) isn't cold..

I rumbled my hair in frustration, I'm going crazy.

I decided too just go and buy milk for the mean time. Class will start in 30 minutes so I have plenty of time.

As I was about to leave, Yamaguchi entered, talking to someone on the phone.

"(Y/N), when will your gig be? May I come?" He asked as he smiled.

How come I don't know this? I need to get the information.

When Yamaguchi ended the call, I went and tried to ask him.

"U-uh... I know you and (Y/N) are probably a thing now but can you tell me some info about their gig or something?" I asked him to which he looked at me weirdly, confusion visible on his face.

"Wait wait hold up." he said as he shook his head.

I tilt my head, obviously not getting him.

"Me and (Y/N)? A thing? I don't think so. We're bestfriends and we have different people we like." He informed me.

I was dumbstruck, they don't like each other romantically? So the song was...

"Yes, you guessed it right, the song was for you." He said, smiling.

I didn't know what to feel, is he serious?

"Ahh, honestly I didn't want to tell you but you looked like a stray dog looking for a bone." He said as he laughed.

I groaned, asking about the info.

"They have a twitter account now, didn't you know?" I shook my head.

"Well, it's this one," He said as he showed me their account. I immediately grabbed my phone and followed it.

"If that's all then I'll be going now." He said as I thanked him.

I looked at their account, only a few pictures and videos were there.

I saw a video with (Y/N) and Haru posing for their promotional photos, trying their best not to laugh.

I smiled unconsciously as I continued scrolling.

My twitter account is empty, literally no posts. But now, I'll be retweeting every tweet (Y/N) makes or the ones he's included in.

He seems to be doing fine... without me.

My shoulders felt heavy. It feels like I've lost motivation to do anything today.

I went to get milk and distract myself, hopefully.

(Y/N)

The week's been hectic but pretty manageable. They said that we'd only be this busy for our debut, we'll most likely have more free time after that.

The band and I are practicing very hard for this, it's our dream and we can't just let it slip by.

Something has been bothering me for quite a while now.

I've been missing Kageyama more each day.

But as much as I miss him, I know for sure that this will be for the better.

A lot of thoughts are running around in my mind that I haven't realized that I made a mistake and everyone's staring at me.

"Hey (Y/N)? You good?" Ken said as he waved his hand in front of me, attempting to wake me up from my daydream.

I snapped back at reality, smiling and apologizing to them.

"We're here if you need someone, yeah?" said Kazu who smiled softly.

I'm very thankful for these people, they make me forget about my problems for a while.

Practice continued on since our performance will be in three days.

I am trying to avoid Kageyama as much as I can, I don't want to burden him even more.

This, for sure, is hurting me. The idea of Kageyama probably seeing someone now inflicts a lot of pain in my heart.

If I keep being with him, I might be in his way of finding his happiness.

But what truly make a person happy? This question has been lingering in my mind lately, it's quite bothering but I can't do anything about it.

I want him to be happy, even if his happiness don't include me. 

Suddenly, a voice interrupted my thought once again.

"You're thinking about Kageyama aren't you?"

Haru looked serious while speaking to me.

"Yeah.. I guess." I replied timidly.

"Do you think you're not worthy of him?"

"Yeah."

Haru read me like an open book, he is my bestfriend after all.

He sighs, "What if he smiles when he thinks about you?"

I didn't reply, that would be too impossible.

"What if he stares at you every time you look away?"

"That's implausible-"

"What if he likes you too?"

I stopped for a moment before speaking again,

"It's still 'What if', Haru. I don't feel confident with the chance I have, a very little one to be precise." 

I said as I sat down, leaning over the wall. Haru sat next to me, staring at nothingness with me.

"A one in a million chance is still a chance, (Y/N). You just have to have a bit of a confidence in you."

He said as he smiled genuinely, what a rare sight.

I sighed before chuckling, "Thank you for those words, Haru. They mean a lot to me, really."

He ruffled my hair as he smiled, "I'm not your bestfriend for nothing, c'mon let's practice for a little more."

We went and practice a for a bit before deciding to call it a day.

I really hope what he said is right. Maybe, being selfish for once won't hurt.

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