X-mas and New Years came and went. It's now February. I spent the holidays in my bed, being despressed. I miss my mom so very much, it hurts. She was my bestfriend. I need her here but I guess it's a little too late for that now.
Chris goes away next week on tour with New Years Day and two other bands I know nothing about. It's going to suck not having him around.
I still manage to go to work. I got wrote up twice already for "unacceptable behavior," whatever though. I keep to myself now a lot, I usually just talk to Chris. Riley and Ty come by once in a while to check on me. Other than that I keep to myself.
I know it's been about a month and a half but I still miss her so much. I know I should be over it, believe me I hear it enough from everyone around me. But it's really not that fucking easy. I sighed and got out of bed to take a shower.
I got out and changed into Chris' basketball shorts and an HIM shirt. I just brushed my hair and went to lay back in my bed. Soon Kemper jumped onto the bed and cuddled with me. At the moment Chris was at Ricky's planning everything out for next week, so he wasn't here to cuddle me.
I decided to take a nap. Even though it was 9a.m. I feel a nap was very necessary.
-
I woke up to Chris wrapping his arms around me. I opened my eyes and looked at him. "Hi baby" he said and kissed me. "Hi, what time is it?" He pulled out his phone to see the time "12:34" he said.
I rolled my eyes. "It's like the middle of the night" I whined. He chuckled "baby, come on let's go eat and do something fun." I sighed "Chris, I don't really want too."
"Baby, I know you are still sad but come on. I hate seeing you like this, it makes me sad seeing you sad and you wouldn't want me sad because both of us being sad will equal two sad people and that wouldn't be fun, now would it?"
I chuckled and shook my head "fine." He cheered and we got up. "Um, why are you wearing my shorts?!" Chris said in a "white girl" voice. I laughed and slid them off. Chris is probably the only person to make me smile even when I'm sad, that's why I love him.
We went to Denny's of course, I just ate some fries, I wasn't really hungry. Afterwards we went to the movies. It was nice I guess, I would rather be in my bed though.
The next day I got up and got ready for work. I put on a Smiths shirt and my black skinny jeans with my Dr. Martens. I straightened my hair, no makeup again.
When I got to to work I immedietly got annoyed. People were loud and annoying. "Excuse me?" a younger girl, maybe about 15 or 16 said. "What?"
"I need this shirt in a bigger size" she said.
"Then go look for it" I snapped.
"You're being a real bitch lady"
I chuckled "okay, whatever. You are perfectly capable of being a big girl and looking for your own shit. Let me guess you can't order your food on your own either?"
"I'm going to your manager!" she then left to go find Erick. "Ny'Elli!" I heard pissed Erick call. I waltz back to his office and he glared at me.
"Ny'Elli, I am so sick of your shitty attitude towards customers. I don't care that your mother passed, it's over and done! Learn to get over it! Your depression isn't an excuse anymore Ny'Elli! Come back to reality!"
I grew with anger. "Listen here you stupid prick, don't bring my mom into this! Goddammit, I have every right to be sad! How about you lose your fucking mom and then try to live your every day life without being miserable! Then tell me how that works out for ya!" I spat, getting in his face.
His faced hardened and he glared at me. "Get out. You're fired." he said coldly.
I grabbed my shit and walked out. I heard Austin and Alexandra calling my name but I ignored them. I went out to my car and drove home.
I got home and told Chris what happened. He said that Erick and I were both in the wrong, he should've never mentioned my mom and I should've never called him a stupid prick. I had every right to. You don't bring up someones dead family member and then expect them to be alright about it.
Later that night Chris and I went to Angelo's. I was actually happy to see him and Kelly. The guys were there too. I honestly had a good night being around all my friends, it took my mind off of everything. Tomorrow the boys leave for tour. I'm not ready, but oh well.
Around 11, Chris and I went home and cuddled up, enjoying it while lasted. We soon fell asleep wrapped in each others arms.
-
It's currently 7a.m, today Chris leaves and I don't want him to go. I need him here. But I know it's his career. I helped him pack his stuff onto the bus. He pulled me into his embrace and we gazed into each others eyes.
"I love you so much Ny'Elli. I'm going to miss you. But I want you to get out more, get a new job, do something productive while I'm gone, okay?" I nodded and he brought me into a deep kiss.
I pulled away and sighed. I heard Josh Korel whistle then say "C'mon boy!" It was time for Chris to go. We kissed once more and hugged each other tightly. "I love you Christopher Thomas." I smiled "And I love you Ny'Elli Rose"
Chris walked to the bus and got into. I waved as they drove off. This is going to be horrible not having Chris by my side. I miss him already...
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Short chapter:D
~KC
