difficult // taegyu

seventh chapter

helloooo, before you read, I just want to give you a short disclaimer. This chapter will be sad! If you're uncomfortable with it or you are in a bad situation, just read it later :) Okay, listen to sad songs and let's gooo!

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As soon as I woke up today, I knew it's a shitty day. And it's all proven now because I sit in front of my parents in the dining hall. My brother sits next to me of course. Many people surrounding us, everyone bothered with their own problems.

Nobody cares about the awkward and tense mood here, at our table.

Of course, all four of us have a forced smile on the face, carefully placed so that nobody would know how we really feel, so that nobody would see the truth.

"... what your mother and I want to tell you is that we need Huening Kai for something in Seoul. We will be back in a few days. Maybe tomorrow or the day after. This is okay with you Beomgyu, right? We heard you two even make friends here, so you won't be all alone." He says, like he would care. And if you ask yourself right now, why he knows it, he has his spies everywhere. That's why I usually don't trust people easily. I mean I am friendly to everyone, but I have no close friends. Until now.

"Yes, that is definitely okay with me." I say calmly, but I'd really like to scream and hold on to my brother like my life depends on it. I don't want him to go. I don't want to be alone.

"Yes, alright." The quiet voice escaping the mouth of my little brother and the forced smile on his lips, although I know he wants to cry, break my heart. I grab his hand tight under the table and give him a more or less real smile.

"My sons, what do you want to eat?" My mother changes the subject as easy as always and smiles at us like we never spoke about a serious topic.

We tell her what we want to eat, and she tells it and the wishes of her husband and hers the waiter, that comes after a short time.

The rest of the time we are sitting here in silence, having short talks about our company and what we did here while they weren't there, but nobody really listens to what the other says.

It's always the same. From the outside we must look like a nice, rich maybe a little quiet family, with a great harmony. But if you could listen and feel the atmosphere you would know what it really is.

After about an hour, what felt like a hundred, Huening Kai and I are allowed to go to our room. I have to help my brother to pack.

"I don't want to leave!" The younger one whines. I pat his back and engulve him into a tight hug.

"I know. I don't want you to go either! But you'll come here again soon, okay? And then we will enjoy our holidays as we should. I promise!" I answer him, while I hug him even tighter.

"Can I have Ice cream too then?" he asks and sounds better than before. I gladly answer with a "Yes, of course" and let go of him so we can pack everything.

I help him bring his luggage downstairs to our parents, where other people will take care of it.

I say goodbye to my parents and to my little brother, after he promised me to text or call me right after they arrived.

"Make sure to be okay the whole time, yes? You can text and call me every time! I'm always here for you!" He nods and answers "I'll but you too, Hyung. Make sure to have fun here and take care!"

We hug each other one last time and I wave all of them while the cars are driving their way.

What do I do now? I'm quite sleepy. Maybe I should rest and ask the other three if they want to do something tomorrow? Yes, I think distraction is what I'll need tomorrow.

I do, what I said and soon I lay in my bed. I sigh, it still rains like in the morning.

I snuggle myself up in my blanket and close my eyes. After a short time, the blackness take over me and I fall asleep.

Everything is black. Black over black. It's everywhere.

But then, suddenly, white lilies start dropping like slow snow. They shine and now I can see that I am in a room. There is nothing in it. Just me and the lilies.

One lily falls down right in front of me. I bend down to grab it and hold it. I softly hold it between both of my hands, scared I could destroy it.

I look up, to find the reason of the dropping lilies, but I can't figure it out. It's all black.

Unexpectedly I feel a drop of liquid right on my cheek. Without seeing it I immediately realize what this warm liquid is.

When I look down again, the lilies aren't all white anymore. They are colored by the red. The red of blood.

With the time all of me is covered with this red. I feel how the blood gets more and more. It raises fast. But I can't move. Now I didn't even see something anymore. The lilies aren't shining, so nothing gives light in the dark room.

All of the sudden I feel heat above me and at the same time I can see something again. Something above me gives flickering light. Because of the heat I can guess what the source of it is.

The blood is now up to my knees. I can't move.

I look at my hands which are sticked with blood. I know it is not my blood. The lily has withered in my hands and without realizing it, I let the lily go. I look how the lily drowns until I cannot see it anymore.

I look up and what I see is fire. I can't take my eyes off it. It flickers aggressively and tries to get me, to engulf me into a tight hug and never let go. It is getting closer by every breath I take and when I look down, where the blood is now up to my thighs, I'm not sure how many times I can do it again.

I still can't move, so I stay in that position.

I see the lilies, now red, drifting around, closer to me. Now they surround me and form a circle.

The liquid increases more and more. The fire above me is getting closer and closer. It doesn't stop. Never.

I start to sweat because of the heat.

The blood now reaches my neck and I feel shivers all over my body.

The heat is now exact above my head, I can smell the burning of some of my hair strains. The liquid covers my chin.

I know it's over now. I have to accept it.

I suddenly start smiling and I feel that a tear escapes my eye, running down my cheek, where the drop of blood was before.

It is better that way, I know it.

Between the worlds of liquid and fire my breathing stops

and everything goes black again.

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omg, I'm emotional right now. I wasn't sure how to write it, but I think it turned out okay, right? The explanation will come sooner or later... maybe a little spoiler: it really isn't his blood that sticks on his hands.

Hope you like it and it's okay that the story has deep aspects! Stay excited and share your thoughts in the comments. I would love to read them!

By the way thank you for over 200 reads! Vote and comment!

Have a great day/ night! ily <3