difficult // taegyu

twenty fourth chapter

It's been a few days, nights, hours, minutes since I saw Beomgyu the last time.

Everything was back to normal. My parents hugged me as they welcomed me, I chilled the last days of summer break and yesterday was my first school day. I only have two years left now till I graduate. Finally, I can't expect the day I'm free of this prison called school. And as I said, everything was back to normal, my other friends and I hang out in lunch break, I sat next to my usual seat mates, I had the same teachers in every subject and all other people cared about their own business. But something was different though.

I can't even deny that I know exactly what is different. You wouldn't expect me to say it, but the only thing that's different is me. I've changed. It's not like I am a totally new person, no. I am the same Taehyun as before, smart, some people would say too cold, and funny if you'd ask me. I have the same conversations I had month before, I talk like I talked, I move how I moved, I act like I acted. But something inside me changed. And nobody notices it.

Something or should I say somebody is constantly on my mind. He won't go away, and I don't want these thoughts to go away, I love it, when I randomly think about him, his cute smile, or his warm voice. He is the reason I smile more. I smile sometimes in my room, on my way back home sometimes even in class. It's like the corners of my mouth goes up automatically as soon as I think about him.

But even though I love thinking about him, remembering all our special moments, I want to feel his presence, hold him in my arms, and kiss him finally again. We call us every day, talking till Beomgyu is asleep, but I still miss him.

And I know he misses me too.

Things got difficult again with his parents, because his mother tries to get closer to him, but he doesn't want it. He avoids his parents, so he doesn't know when he will be coming back to Seoul. And that doesn't bother only me, but him too.

Right then, in this precise moment, my door opens revealing my mother with a bride grin on her face. "What's wrong, mum?"

"Somebody wants to see you." She answers, the smile isn't leaving her lips, which looks so like mine.

"I don't feel like seeing other people right now." I say sternly.

"Don't be a moody teenager, just go upstairs." She won't leave me alone, so I stand up anyway.

I go out of my room, and upstairs to meet, whoever dares to ruin my time lying in bed and think about my life decisions.

Without even looking at the person I open my mouth: "What do you wan-"

I feel someone's hugging me, burying their head in my chest. And that's when reality hits me. I know who these arms belong to, I know who is so desperate to hug me.

"Beomgyu" My whisper is so quiet that he's the only one hearing it, but that's alright, he is the only one who should hear it anyway.

I can't believe it, is this real?

I slowly melt into the hug, rubbing soothing circular motions on his back as I rocked him back and forth, comforting my panda. And even though I'm home since days, I finally feel like it. Having Beomgyu in my arms, makes me feel like home.

I missed him so much.

After a few seconds he lifts his head up, letting me see his teary eyes. Before I could change my mind, or Beomgyu says anything, I speak up, what's on my mind: "Let's go on a date!"

I grab his arm, shout for my mother that we are leaving and lead our way to wherever.

It's already in the afternoon, so it's getting dark. Luckily, we are able to the see moon already.