LILAC (Fred Weasley)

Chapter 12

„Dear Diary,

I DID IT TODAY.

HIS FACE WAS PRICELESS.

SOME SEVENTH YEAR GIRLS SHOUTED AND GAVE ME APPROVAL.

I FELT LIKE I'M IN A MOVIE.

I'm not kidding. When I approached the twins today at lunch I took all my bravery I had and asked Fred in front of all those people if he wanted to be my companion for the next Hogsmeade trip.

He didn't say anything at all at first and looked at his brother confused for a moment. Then he turned to me and nodded slowly.

Until then I realized it was George I was asking per accident.

But when those Gryffindor girls realized what I was doing and what I achieved they shouted a "yas girl" at me. It felt great to get approval from the older ones, that don't even know me. I had to smile.

Well the only problem is that I am now going with George. Same cute face, just not as effective as Fred's.

When I retreated from the table, I had to hold back my laughter and bit into my fist, placing myself next to Gemma. She asked me more than once what was wrong, but I couldn't tell her about that defeat. Also that would mean, she would get to know my crush on Fred.

I couldn't just go up to them again and explain that I got the wrong twin. How embarrassing would that be? So I'm going with George to Hogsmeade as friends and explain there that all of this was just a big misunderstanding. It's George after all, he will understand it.

Okay, thinking about it now makes me laugh again. That is just too funny. Just I am that dumb to mistake my crush.

Sean also seems awfully quiet lately. When Gemma and I sit down beside him on the Hufflepuff table next to his friends, he seems distant. Bradley approached us yesterday to talk about his odd behaviour and I have to admit Bradley was right, Sean seems to have something on his mind.

I already pushed Gemma to talk with him about it. To push him to spill the guts, but she doesn't want to pressure him. We asked him often if there was something he wants to talk about, but he always shrugs it off as nothing. I'm worried about him.

What if he feels like he can't be honest with us?

I would hate that. He is my best friend after all. For him not having the feeling to be able to trust me would be horrific.

Gemma noticed that Emma also seems very quiet when we sit to them at the table. So we thought, what if they both have something to do with their sudden mood change?

Could there be a possibility of them having feelings for each other? And they have drama?

Just like in a movie. Was my life always like a movie and I just haven't realized until now?

How mind-blowing.

Maybe I am a figure in someone's story and just haven't realized?

Sorry I got carried away for a moment.

Back to the news. Tomorrow I will try out my first quidditch training. I managed to convince Gemma to come along. She insisted on just sitting in the stands simply watching me, no matter how often I tried to convince her to give it a go. Maybe I will manage it tomorrow.

She claims that she won't be good enough anyways, so why even trying? I say those are just her nerves and her hang to overthink everything that could go wrong again and letting her fear stop her from experiencing something new that could be good for her.

I'm still believing that she would be a great quidditch player. It's always the quiet ones that have a lot to offer.

If she just pushes away her worries for a short moment, she would see that she is capable of dealing with something new in the end. And if it sucks and doesn't turn out as great as wanted? Whatever. If she accidently makes a fool out of herself? Great too, at least something we can laugh about and tell stories later to our children.

But if she really doesn't want to give it a go, I won't pressure her too much. She has enough guilt feelings as there is.

Wish me luck for tomorrow!

Love,

Jade."

Jean laughs. The incident where she asked the wrong twin. A story still told at family gatherings to get a laugh out of the attendants. Her father loved to tell that story. It was one of his favourites. What she admired most about her parents was their ability to laugh about mistakes and failures.

When they made a fool out of themselves, when they lost, when they made big mistakes they usually saw it with humour. Her mother would hind behind her father being a bit embarrassed at first before laughing. Endless teasing was part of having them as parents.

However, that just helped Jean. She would brush teasing either off when it happened in school, or would know the best way to respond. And whenever she was afraid to try something new, she would think about the fun parts of it rather than everything that could go wrong and if she ever needed a voice of reason, she could simply write to her godmother for advice.