Guilty Pleasures [Completed]

Chapter 38

"Mama.. let's go." Cane shook my hand. I couldn't focused on what he was saying because my eyes won't left Armin.

I gasped and tightened my grip on Cane's hand. I pulled Cane to hide behind me but it's too late when Armin's vision was already with Cane.

My heart won't stop beating loudly when I saw Armin's expressionless face. But it ended a few seconds when confusion took over his look. He glanced at me and back to Cane again.

Armin isn't stupid. Yet I wanted to wish he wouldn't recognize his own features im Cane's appearance.

"Mama, let's get inside--"

"Y/N."

I flinched at Armin when I heard his angry voice for the first time. He used to be calm but the anger in his voice doesn't sound like him.

"I wanted to talk to you so I went to your house. But you weren't there. I never understand when your mom said she can't tolerate your selfishness. And gave me your address."

Mom..

"I never thought you'd be with Jean. I was mad at the thought that you two are living together--"

"I told you! We're not dating! I'm not that crazy to date Y/N who's like a sister to me--"

"And that kid." Armin ignored Jean and glanced on Cane. "He doesn't look like Jean's son at all."

I bit my lip and looked away. If only I could hide Cane away from here. Why at the time like this?

Armin slowly walked to approach us as I stepped back in shock. Armin crouched down infront of Cane that made my eyes widen.

He smiled softly and Cane stared at him. "Kid, may I know who's your.. father?"

My fists clenched tightly when Cane glanced at Jean and looked up to me. I looked away and closed my eyes feeling frustrated.

Cane didn't know. There's no point in that question if he don't know that answer.

"I never met my father." Cane muttered as his shook. Cane's small hand gripped on me.

"But his name is Armin Arlert. Uncle Jean said I looked like him a lot."

My eyes fell wide open of what Cane said. He didn't looked at me again but his eyes are shaking as tears are slowly pooling his small eyes.

I looked at Jean in shock and saw him averted his gaze from me, guilt flashed his face.

"Cane." I whispered. "Would you like to get inside--"

I gasped when Cane suddenly cried and let go of my hands as he jumped to Armin and hugged him. Armin's shock expression grabbed my attention.

Cane's small body was hugging Armin as his expression softend and accepted the kid who just ran towards him.

I almost let go of the groceries in my hands. Armin looked at me as Cane cried on his arms.

I never saw Cane cried. Not even once other than he was just an infant. But as he grew up, seeing him cry is rare. Even if he scratched his knee, even if something bleeds from him, he would act tough as if it was nothing.

But seeing him crying as he saw Armin for the first time.

Is my mom actually right? Was I actually selfish for preventing my child to have a father?

I never even knew if Armin would accept the child on my womb years ago. I jumped into the conclusion where he won't.

Was Cane actually longing for a father figure but he refuses to talk?

"Arcane.." I whispered and tapped his shoulder but he shook his head and buried his face on Armin's neck.

I sighed and gave up as Armin looked away from me and easily carried Cane. I looked away and walked passed him as I went infront of Jean's condo to open it.

"Y/N--"

"I'll be expecting a lot of explaination from you tomorrow, Kirstein." I said calmly.

"Right." He nodded and looked down. "I better prepare a huge ass speech that's why I won't be comming home tonight." He said and runaway to escape.

Armin quietly followed behind me as I placed the groceries down and faced Armin. Cane was already sleeping on his shoulder.

I reached for Cane but Armin stepped back and stared at me coldly. I clicked my tongue and walked passed him while feeling pissed.

I unlocked the guestroom where Jean let us stay as Armin walked to the bed and gently laid Cane on the bed.

When I saw that he's peacefully sleeping, I turned around and avoided Armin. "You can leave now--"

I was cut off when Armin held my arms and pulled me outside. He gently closed the door and let go of my arms.

I thought he would yell at me about the situation but he held my hands and lowered his head.

"I was.. I was an asshole for hurting you." I looked up to him confusingly. "But I don't want to lie anymore. I did used to hurt Eren."

I stiffened and furrowed his brows. Why is he saying this now?

"That was my first intention when I met you." He gripped my hands and stared deeply into my eyes. "That was all I have in mind, but seeing you come to me and end up going back to Eren's house made me jealous."

"It's true that it's always Eren who ended up being chosen with anyone. It's true that I hated him because of that. And that I can easily let go of you once I fulfill my anger to him. But I keep questioning myself, why would you still choose Eren when you can have me?"

He sniffed and looked away as he continued.

"I can do better than Eren. I can give you what you wanted. I can love you more than he did and won't make you feel unwanted. But it's always Eren. Atleast.." He paused and his voice shook. "Atleast love me like you did to him--"

"You're fucking stupid." I said that made him froze. I shook my head in disappointment and sighed. "Here I thought Cane got your genes but you're so stupid, Armin."

"What.. What do you mean by that--"

I sighed and looked away.

Why did I blurted that out when I'm the one who's more stupid for assuming easily.

"Why would you think that I never looked at you that way?" I stated. He was stiffening while furrowing his brows.

"What are you saying?"

"I'm saying that if I loved Eren more than you, you think Cane would exist right now? If I did, don't you think that I'd rather carry Eren's child, right? I carried that kid for nine months only to look and act exactly like you. Now you're blurting nonsense infront of me."

His eyes widened and before he could even talk, I walked passed him and let my phone out.

"I'm making a call. Don't bother me." I said and went outside the condo. But in all honesty, I just wanted to calm my heart that feels like who just came from a marathon.