"What we have to lose"

66

Did I regret running with Max again afterwards? Yes I did. I was all out of breath even though we only ran one lap. I was relived when I calmed back down, at least partly. "Why am I always saying yes to this?" I ask and earned a laughter from Max "But you improved, you weren't that slow like last time." he said laughing and I ran after him. "Watch your words, it depends on the pain level you'll have." I replied and laughed as well.
Back in the motorhome we met Christian and had a talk with him. He was really happy to see me back at work as well. I hope I feel this good all the time so I can be here and do this. A dream, just a dream.
"I hope you're not in too much pain tomorrow, oh wait no I hope you are in pain." I said after the massage. "Thanks, I appreciate that." he replied but laughed. He hugged me tightly and thanked me. Since I'll spend most of the time with Red Bull this weekend I decided to go to Daniel now. I met him and Nico in the Renault hospitality and we sat there for lunch. Nico is such a nice guy and Daniel and he get along very well already. I'm so happy to see Daniel happy again. Red Bull stole his big smile, but he gained it back.
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It's quali day today and what did I start my day with? Exactly, a nose bleed. I hoped they would stop. Daniel was already out with Michael which I was happy about. Even though I have these as a side effect from my medication, Daniel is still worried every single time. I was able to stop it after a while and took my medication. I put the IV on and ordered breakfast to the hotel room.
I was watching the qualifying in the Red Bull garage as usual and was happy to see the results. Daniel missed Q3 by 0.140 seconds but he was still happy with P11. Max had a good qualifying and will start from P5 tomorrow. Daniel joined me in the Red Bull garage to congratulate Max. I'm so happy to see both of them still being really close friends. All of the mechanics were also really nice to Daniel.
I went into Max's drivers room to do another session.
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It was obviously really late at night when we arrived back at the hotel. I went to sleep immediately. When Daniel ripped me out of my sleep I thought it was the next day already and that we slept in. "Wake up Amilia." I opened my eyes to see Daniel basically sitting on me, a scared look on his face. "What?" I ask. "God I thought something happened, you screamed." he replied. I did what? I didn't even had a bad dream. "I don't know Why, I thought we slept in and that's why you wake me up." I said honestly. It was curious, no one was able to make up something why I screamed. Daniel checked every little inch of my body to see if I'm hurt somewhere. We couldn't find anything. It was the middle of the night and we decided to stop thinking about it and go back to sleep.
I obviously wasn't able to fall back asleep. I thought about any possible reason why I screamed. Was my body hurt? Maybe inside? I came up with the wild thought that my body wants to tell me something with this. But how? And what does it want to tell me?
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When we arrived at the track on Sunday, I thought this will be such a good day. Never have I imagined that it's going down the hill....
The drivers were getting ready for the race and I ran into the Renault's garage to wish Daniel good luck. I couldn't send him out without telling him what I always tell him. I walked back to the Red Bull garage and wished Max good luck as well. I sat back on my usual seat, put the headphones on and waited, nervous as usual.
All the lights turned off and I was praying. Daniel had a very good start and made it to P6 before the first corner. He was right behind Max who was still P5. Then the disaster began. Max and Carlos were battling in the first corner, Max giving a puncture to Carlos. Max was able to drive ahead of Carlos and took P4. While I was trying to find Daniel I saw that he was in a collision as well. Daniel was sandwiched my two other cars, literally ripping off half his front wing. I started at the screen and thought that I'm dreaming. The mechanics and his engineer where doing anything they could, he pitted after the first lap and got a new front wing. I prayed that from now on, he'll have a good race. But when I heard the engineer saying that Daniel has a power loss and has to retire after only two rounds I was devastated. He doesn't deserve that. He just answered shortly and I was about to rip my headphones off. I decided to watch the race till the end and then go to Daniel. I texted him that whenever he needs me that I'll come to his room.
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