Dysphoric (DNF-ftmGeorge)

Part 38

Eeewwwwwwwwwww
Dysphoria+school?? Suck my dick.

YO I JUST ENCOUNTERED A TRANSPHOBE. Cross that off my bucket
list.

He was short anyways, easy to kick.

Triggers:
-alcohol
-implied abuse
-trauma
-swearing/yelling

Third person:
"Heeeeyyyyyyyyyyy" Quackity whined, poking the tallers cheek as he tried to focus on what he was typing, "sapnap give me aTtEnTiOn" he continued.
Karl walked back into the room, "Quack, leave Sapnap alone he's busy" he stated.
The shorter reluctantly stopped and decided to leave as Karl went back to sleep and he didn't want to annoy a sleepy Karl.

Nobody in the room really seemed to notice that he felt, too busy doing their own thing, Sapnap on his laptop writting something and Karl in the bed near him asleep.
The only thing that seemed to change was Sapnaps ability to finally concentrate.

The noirette was full of energy that he needed to release, he needed to find someone to hang out with, he would be leaving in a few days too.
3 months had passed so quickly.

He hopped down the stairs and saw Bad at the island fumbling with a bag, "BAD!" He beamed, "I hardly ever see you home! Are you-"
"Sorry Quackity I'm already late, I'll talk to you later!" Bad waved at him, checking his watch as he grabbed his bag and left the house.

And once again Quackity was left alone.

Dream and George were on their date, Sapnap and Karl were not to be disturbed, Bad was out doing something (probs Skeppy (; hah).

But he shrugged it off, he had become good at just bouncing back because moping doesn't change anything, if he was just going to be alone for the rest of the day he would be fine.

Just like he always was.

-(ayo flashback?)-

Quackity just finished with chores and smiled proudly at his work before searching the cupboards and fridge for something he could cook up for dinner.
He heard footsteps enter the room, "hey! Do you want som-" the door slammed.
Without a single word, Schlatt had just ignored him and left.
He did this every night.

The noirette sighed, hoping maybe tonight would be different, "it's fine. He's just busy." He grumbled, grabbing some food for the both of them anyway just incase he wanted some when he came home.
Whenever that would be.

-(end of flashback)-

Quackity shivered at the memory of his ex husband, wanting to just stop remembering him.
Somehow being alone and only left with your thoughts made it almost impossible to stop thinking of things you didn't want to think about.
He opened one of the cabinets hoping to find something to do, but instead was met with bottles of wine.

Alcohol.

He cringed at the sight, that was unlucky. He didn't know they were in there, yet somehow he had stumbled apon them just after thinking about him.

A shiver ran up his spine and he closed the cabinet feeling very uncomfortable.

He hated alcohol.

-(ayo we back w memories ig)-

A loud smash shook him into reality, Schlatt stood on the other side of the trashed living room, a broken bottle in hand. The room recked of alcohol, the noirette covered his nose with his sleeve to try and dim the smell even just a little, but to no avail.
"What did I say about talking back to me?" He slurred, Quackity was shocked, he could respond, "I said what the fuck did I say about talking back to me!" He growled.
This wasn't the first time the taller had come home drunk and threatened him, and it wouldn't be the last, but this was one of the first times he had actually gotten violent.
He stomped over to the shorter, pointing the broken bottle at him threateningly, the sharp spikes getting closer and closer each step.

The noirette wasn't sure what to do, only taking a few shaky steps back without even being able to control his limbs.

Fight, flight or freeze.

Compared to Schlatt? Too weak to fight.
He wasn't fast enough to get around the figure to escape through the door either, having to dodge broken glass and the tallers reflexes even when drunk.

He was frozen.

His mind kept screaming at him to do something but he just couldn't, he didn't dare move or speak in this situation, but he always wished that maybe he tried, tried to speak or run away.
He always regretted not trying.
And he hated how pathetic it made him feel.

-(end ig)-

After one of the many negative memories of Schlatt found it's way to his head, his body seemed to go into fight or flight.
He felt like he was back there, even without Schlatt he would always be ready to run, always on edge no matter what.

He could feel multiple parts of his body shake, as if preparing itself for the beating his mind was expecting from a man he hadn't seen in years.
His mind was muffled and confused, he knew where he was, but his body thought he was in danger.

It's as if all of his senses were heightened, flinching and panicking at every slight sound in the house that he had never noticed before, or just sudden ones from outside.
He could feel everything, the cool breeze of an open window that blew past him, the cold kitchen floor beneath, the fabric of his shirt as he hugged his arms.
His eyes darted to anything that moved or reflected something that seemed animated, any movement was quickly detected.
But he always froze.
Just like back then.

Somehow, his mind tricked his senses, every now and then he could smell a hint of alcohol in the air, as if like then, it had drenched the room and contaminated the rooms original scent.
He knew it wasn't real, but the memory of the smell seemed to make it seem so, every time he inhaled through his nose and he detected alcohol, the whole room seemed to switch to a memory of his old shared apartment, the broken glass, the stained floors, the grubby home he had spent so much of his time every day trying to keep clean and tidy only for Schlatt to come home and destroy it.

He quickly made his way up the stairs, he didn't feel safe. His body didn't feel safe. His mind was starting to follow in its footsteps.

He shakily opened the door to Sapnaps room, he felt so bad, he really didn't want to be disturbing them, he really didn't want to upset them.
He hated feeling the way he currently did, his mind and body at war, fighting for choice, he just wanted to feel safe, not the overwhelming amounts of confusion and conflict between safety and danger his brain and body were putting him through.

He sniffled as he walked over to them, Sapnaps attention immediately tore away from the work he was doing to look at a shaking Quackity, who immediately flinched at Sapnaps sudden movements.
"I-I'm sorry I just..." he started, he really hoped he wouldn't make anyone upset or angry at his intrusion.

Karl woke up, like a sixth 'sad boyfriend' sense had awoken him, after seeing Quackity the way he was he immediately flipped the covers off and reached his arms out to signal for the shorter to climb into bed with him.
He hesitated for a moment, his body freezing at the thought of every sharp piece of glass or other smashed objects that he would be threatened with.
But after a moment of realisation, he finally found the courage to move, climbing into the bed with Karl.

He quickly wrapped his arms around the tallers waist, hiding his head in his chest and squeezing his eyes shut. He just wanted the feeling to go away.
He wanted the memories to go away.

Karl and Sapnaps exchanged a confused and concerned glance.
They didn't know what was making the noirette act this way, but until he had calmed down, they decided it was best to not ask about it just yet.
Quackity hadn't told them much about his relationship with his ex-husband, only a rough idea of the sort of things he had done to him, most of it was hinted by the fact that Quackity didn't do well with loud noises, yelling and arguing, along with alcohol.

He hated alcohol.

And the other two never had a single drop of it since he opened up about it almost a year ago.