Everything in Between

Chapter 4

Tumikhim ako bago tumango sakanya. I saw his face light up because of my nod.

"I was only a child when my father start abusing my mother. The first time, he's drunk and she slapped my mother to the point that his palm trace to my mothers cheeks. Parang natauhan si papa nang matapos nya iyon nagawa kay mama at nag sorry sya, maging saakin na nakita iyon. But after that my father starts drinking and smoking. My mother start to say that it's not good for him and he slapped my mother again, and that time my mother was holding a glass of coffee for him but it pours down to her chest. I saw it, he never apologized to her. My mother treated herself. " my voice broke looking back at those days.

"Until my father starts abusing my mother every night or sometimes every morning if he's not in the mood. Lahat ng galit nito ay ibubuhos nya kay mama. My mother doesn't want me to see those things so every time he would hurt her she always say that I should play with my friend ni I don't have one. Takot sila kay papa and I understand them because even me. I'm also afraid. Until now. Papa uses drugs. " I looked at him. I saw pity and concern on his eyes. I tried to smile but I failed. Tears are rolling down o my cheeks. Lumapit ito saakin bago hilahin ako payakap sakanya. I gripped his shirt. Hinayaan ko nang mabasa ng luha ko ang damit nito.

"Stop it. I know now. If it's hurt just cry. I'm here " he whispered. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang nagtulak saakin para mag open up kay Favio. Maybe I felt something new? Maybe being comfortable with him made me open up.

Ilang araw matapos ang pag uusap namin na iyon ni Favio. Lagi itong pumupunta sa bukid tuwing tanghalian at kung minsan ay may dalang pagkain at makikikain na din kasama namin. Hindi ko na din sinabi kay mama ang ginawang pag sampal saakin ni papa ayaw kong mag alala pa ito.

"Pupunta ba dito ang kaibigan mo? " napakunot ang noo ko dahil sa sinabi ni mama. I licked my lower lip before answering him.

I feel comfortable when I'm Favio. He's the only friend who last more than days. I feel safe when I'm with him.

"Hindi ko po alam. " sagot ko bago nag iwas ng tingin.

Hinawakan ni mama ang kamay ko na nasa ibabaw ng lamesa. Ngumiti ito saakin. I only want to see my mother smiling.

"Masaya ako dahil may kaibigan ka na, Ascella. " tipid akong ngumiti sakanya bago tumango.

"Hindi din po siguro mag tatagal iyon. " sagot ko. Kumunot ang noo nito.

"Paano mo nasabi? Mabait naman si Favio at mukhang komportable ka naman tuwing andito sya. " I pressed my lips together before answering her.

"Mayaman po si Favio at maraming kaibigan. Baka nga po pagkatapos ng summer ay hindi na nito ako pansinin. " I heard bitterness in my voice. I cleared my throat before looking away. Masagana ngayon  ang mga palay at marami silang naaani.

"Hindi naman estado sa buhay ang pamantayan ng pakikipag kaibigan. Nakita ko na totoo ang intesyon sayo ni Favio. Baka naman hindi lang pag kakaibigan ang nasa isip mo. Malaki ka na, Ascella. Alam mo na ang tama at mali. " namula ang mukha ko dahil sa sinabi nito.

"Hindi po pumapasok sa isip ko ang mag karoon ng boyfriend, Ma at hindi ganuon ang tingin ko kay Favio. Kaibigan lang po talaga. " nakangiting sagot ko. Nakita ko ang pagtango nito. Napatingin kami sa likod ko nang may huminto doong kotse. Lumabas doon  si Favio na nakasuot ng puting shirt at short. May ngiti ito sa labi habang nag lalakad sa pwesto namin.

Nag mano ito kay mama bago umupo sa tabi ko.

"Magandang Tanghali po. " Bati nito kay mama. Ngayon ko lang napansin na may dimples pala ito sa magkabilang pisngi. He's sharp chiseled jaw looks really great. His brown eyes are very expressive, parang walang itatago. His pointed nose, and pinkish lips. I bit my lower lips before looking away from his lips.
"Kumain ka na? " takang tanong nito saakin. Tipid akong ngumiti.