Love in Limbo

Chapter Nine

"Hey Grams" I say, as the phone picks up.

"Sarah my darling...how was your day" she asks with enthusiasm, as only someone you love asks it with, genuinely and curiously.

"Better" I reply honestly. "I feel more like myself" I say, taking a deep breath. I look up at the sun that is shining through the trees above me.

I am sat in the park just opposite the coffee shop, it is a beautiful day out and the park is busy with families. I sit and watch them, enjoying the calm breeze that is dancing around my shoulders and lifting my dark hair in soft rhythmic sways.

"Glad to hear it darling" Grams replies.

"And how are you...do you want to come home yet" I ask with a smile. "I can have the car out front in minutes." I joke, feeling the corners of my mouth twitch upwards at the coughing fit and laughter on the end of the phone.

"You know I would in a heartbeat, Sunshine" she replies "So how come you are coming by late tonight" she asks curiously.

"I have a dinner to go to" I reveal, not offering too much information.

"With who" she asks.

I squeeze my eyes shut, knowing she won't understand the answer "The Colonels" I practically whisper.

"Sarah" Grams declares matter of fact "You can't" she adds. "It's just not right Sarah...to sit there knowing that you have seen their daughter, have spoken with her no less, and not say a thing"

"I know" I reply anxiously. "But Blair was insistent and she's been messaging me all day about it...she's excited" I offer back, unsure of what to do.

"Cassie was here last night" Grams drops in, like an anchor dropping into the ocean with me attached.

I sit up straight and attempt to breathe. "She was" I ask "She's back" I continue, completely shocked and relieved. "Is she okay"

"She's absolutely fine Sarah... other than being stuck in a perpetual limbo where the only people that can see her are a lady about to kick the bucket, one with Alzheimer's, and then finally...you. Finally she has someone her age, whom she knows, but you, it's you, and you've run away from her the moment she let you in"

"I didn't know what to do... I got scared" I whispered, holding back the tears.

"Oh Sarah" Grams said affectionately "So is she"

"I was going to come back...I swear I was...I just needed a moment before I had to face her...or the fact she may have gone. I didn't know Grams, if she was even coming back. She disappeared right in front of me" I say, as tears fall down my cheeks.

"I know darling...I know. I told her you would be back...she knows"

I wipe my eyes with my sleeve and stand up, pushing my bag onto my shoulder. "I have to go to this dinner now Grams, but I will be up later tonight and I will stop in with Cassidy...I promise"

"I love you honey" she says a little breathlessly. "Don't feel you have to see Cassie tonight. Take your time. I don't want you to feel I rushed you. I just don't want you two to be miserable when there is no reason you can't see each other. Sarah sometimes you have to face the fear and rise...not run"

"I am trying" I reply, getting onto my bike. "See you later" I whisper before clicking off and placing the phone in my bag. I pushed off with my right foot and rode the neighborhoods over to Webber Avenue, to the Colonels, a feeling of dread in the pit of my stomach.

***

I placed my bike in the driveway, parking behind the cars that seemed uniform and perfectly parked. There are four cars, two red and two black. The large range rovers are black and at the back, and the red jeep and the red corvette are up front, every shade immaculate and the same as its twin that it sits beside. I note the banners on the door and above the double garage, they have 'our senior' and 'Congratulations Blair Bear' written on them.