being alive | glee

16. DON'T CRY FOR ME, KURT

CHAPTER SIXTEEN |
don't cry for me, kurt

***

JASON WAS LAUGHING AROUND WITH Nick and Jeff when his phone buzzed in his pocket. He was almost tempted to ignore it, but he was sort of grounded after his mom found out he and Sebastian had sex in her house while she was gone, and he was not going to be the one to ignore Angie Moreno's phone call.

He picked it out of his pocket without looking at the name, swiping the answer button.

"Hello?"

He heard a sniffle coming from the other end. "I need you."

Jason could feel his heart constricting when he heard that voice. He hadn't heard Kurt's voice for nearly two months now. The sound was almost foreign, but not completely and he hated it. He gets up out of his seat and walks away from the Warblers to the quiet common room.

"Kurt... are you okay? Is it your dad?" his anxiety heightens, worrying that maybe it's Burt. That's the only thing he can think of that would cause Kurt to break his vow of silence.

There's another sniffle before Jason hears his voice. "No. Uh, it's Dave."

"Your bully?" Jason asks in confusion.

"H-he tried to kill himself. It's all my fault, Jay." the term of endearment doesn't fall on deaf ears, but Jason chooses to ignore it and instead focus on Kurt's tears.

"That's not your fault, Kurt."

There's a rustle on the other end of the phone and then Blaine is speaking. "Please just come. I don't know how to help him. You do."

Jason sighs, his eyes falling on Sebastian's laughing figure to his right and he answers. "Okay. I'll be there soon."

"Thank you." And with that, the line dies.

Sometimes Jason feels like Sebastian is on this astral plane where he can just sense that something's wrong. Maybe it's that they're in love or that body, mind, and soul, they are completely interwoven, but Jason just knows that there is nobody on earth who has ever known him better than Sebastian. Not Kurt. Not even Blaine who has known him almost his whole life.

Sebastian pulls away from the group when he sees Jason's distraught expression. He reaches over and squeezes his boyfriend's hand. "Are you okay?"

Jason looks at him with wide eyes, like he doesn't know how to tell him. "I... that was Kurt. Karofsky tried to kill himself."

Sebastian feels a sting in his heart. At first because of Kurt. Kurt was their main obstacle and since he removed himself from Jason's life, they couldn't have been happier. But then his ears tune in to the mention of Karofsky and those words pull at him over and over.

Better yet, just stay in the closet, buddy.

It was before he really had Jason - when he was horribly bitter because Jason had refused to move on from Kurt with him and he didn't even know the guy really. He was just being a dick to be a dick. He knew Karofsky frequented Scandals often and that just happened to be the night he chose to be a jerk. He wanted so badly to take those words back now.

"Are you okay?" Jason notices his boyfriend tense up, his hand molding into Sebastian's in that way he always does to comfort him.

Sebastian's eyes glaze over in a way that only Jason has ever gotten to witness. He's the only one who really knows Sebastian - the only one that Sebastian will really let in.

"I said something to him a few months ago. Told him to stay in the closet," Sebastian can see the disappointment in Jason's gaze and he feels the need to apologize immediately. "I was just so bitter over the you and Kurt thing and I wanted to hurt him. I-I, is this my fault?"