Promise. (Manthony)

Forty-Two

     Mitchel hits number five as we enter the elevator. I watch as the doors close and the air fills with silence. I was too nervous to speak. Instead, I kept thinking of stupid questions to ask, such as, "How are you doing?"

It wasn't a decent question to ask someone with who you had just spent about three hours in the car. I look down at my phone and notice it's five-thirty. With the time change, it felt a lot later than it was. I wasn't too clear as to why Mitchel had gotten us a hotel room for the weekend. It wasn't as if he chose a random hotel and told me we were staying there because we had nothing better to do.

No, he chose the fanciest hotel he could find. The Alila Marea Beach Resort. It was beautiful in Autumn, which was now transitioning into Winter as December twenty-first was approaching quickly. I couldn't imagine how expensive it must have been, but I was not about to complain.

The view was of the Southern California coastline. You could see miles upon miles of the ocean. It was beautiful. Mitchel had handed me a brochure when he had checked in. The hotel provided a spa, game room, pool, ballroom, cafe, and more. I had also read that their room service was excellent. As we reach the fifth floor, the elevator dings signaling that the doors are about to open and we could get out.

I couldn't help but look around the resort in awe. It was beautiful, and I couldn't believe that I was here, with Mitchel.

     "You should put your hoodie on. Paparazzi has a strange way of finding us, especially lately." I oblige and do as Mitchel suggests. He does the same, and we quickly find our room and enter just as someone seemed to have recognized us. Hopefully, they didn't because people would know what hotel and room number we were staying in

Once the news of Elijah and I breaking up was revealed (due to Elijah tweeting about it in a respectful manner), the paparazzi was back to focusing on who either of us might be seeing next. Someone had spotted Mitchel and I out a few days before, and the rumors spread like an uncontrollable wildfire. I was bombarded with questions and had camera flashes blinding me everywhere I went, and so did Mitchel. But, of course, he was better at handling it than I was. I reminded everyone that Mitchel was still "dating" Lily, which was true but not at the same time.

     I set my things down and looked around the room. It was huge. I look over at the bed and notice rose petals arranged into a heart. Very romantic. I looked in the mirror and saw my face had become a light shade of red. I wasn't embarrassed. I was extremely excited. I didn't like to admit it, but I was sure anyone with a brain could tell.

Mitchel comes out of the bathroom and places his hands on his hips. "You like?" He asks, interrupting my wandering thoughts. I nodded my head as I felt too shy to say anything. Mitchel gives me a weak smile and walks over to me. I feel my throat go dry as he steps closer. Mitchel tucks a strand of hair behind my ear. I could feel his breath against my skin, making me shiver from the warmth. I clear my throat and look behind me for the fridge.

"I'm thirsty...are you?" I ask, pulling away from Mitchel's touch and heading over to the mini-fridge.  I knew Mitchel was confused by my behavior, but I couldn't help but feel confused by everything that was going on between us. I knew he loved me, and maybe that should have been enough, but the whole world believed he was with someone else or that he was possibly in love with that someone else. It was hard to believe he was only about me. I felt dramatic whenever I thought about it, occasionally convincing myself that I didn't have the right to feel the way I did, but I knew deep down that my feelings were valid. 

     I toss Mitchel a water bottle without hearing his answer first. We hadn't been alone like this in so long that I wasn't sure how to act. I hear Mitchel put the water down and walk towards me again. I don't turn around to face him. He carefully wrapped his arms around my body from behind as I looked out the glass door and took in the gorgeous view. My heart aches from Mitchel's action as flashbacks appear in my mind. Elijah had done the same thing to me before I broke up with him. Break-ups are never easy, no matter what it's about.

"Mitchel," I whisper sadly. I did my best to control my tears, but it was difficult. "What's the matter?" Mitchel asks without hesitation. I turn around in Mitchel's embrace, so we're face to face. I was happy that Mitchel hadn't let go and kept holding me in his arms.

"I-I know you probably don't want to hear this, but I haven't spoken to anyone about it. Everything that happened between Elijah and I hurt so badly," I explain. Mitchel's concerned expression softens, and he gives me a look that tells me he understood my feelings. He didn't seem angry nor jealous.

"I can't help but feel like the shitty person. Tanner and Elijah had fallen in love with me, and I broke their hearts like they meant nothing to me," I continue with tears now falling. I sniffle and wipe my nose on the sleeve of my shirt. I place my water down and cover my eyes with my hands as the tears weren't going to stop since I allowed them to begin in the first place.

"Now you understand how I felt when I did the same to Jordan and Elijah," My shoulders were shaking from the crying I was doing. Suddenly everything hurt like I had been stabbed in the heart. Mitchel gently removes my hands from my eyes and wipes my tears away with his thumb. "I have a question, though. Why did you let things go with the both of them?" Mitchel motions for us to sit down on the bed. He moves the rose petals, and we both sit next to one another.

"I didn't love them. I didn't feel the way that I knew they felt." I tell Mitchel. He nods.

"And I did the same with Jordan and Elijah. I tried to love them. I tried to convince myself that I did, but it never worked. I cared for them, but there's a big difference between just caring and just loving someone. Someone you want to be with deserves both. So, as hard as it is to accept, we both did the right thing. They'll each realize that as well."

"But it's hard," I whisper so my voice doesn't crack from the tears that kept falling. Mitchel gets up and crouches down in front of me. He places both of his hands on my knees, looking up at me, and forcing me to look down at him.

"Is there someone you do love?" He asks. I roll my eyes and wipe away the tears.

"You know I'm in love with you," I tell him with a "duh" tone in my voice. Mitchel's eyes light up with hope.

"And me too. Put it this way, Christian. I hurt Jordan and Elijah. I hated that I did as I cared for them deeply. I still do. They were a part of my life, whether I like it or not. They helped me realize who I was then and who I am now. They helped me realize who I didn't want to be and who I did." Mitchel looks at me sincerely. I could tell he meant everything he was saying.

"Without them, I wouldn't have accepted who I am and who I love. That's you. I love you and always have. I hate hurting people, but I also needed to do what was best for me. Leaving them hurt them, but it was best for them as I didn't feel the same way, and it was best for me as I also deserve to be happy. Maybe you were happy for a little while with Tanner and Elijah, but that wore off. They may have been happy, but you became unhappy. Your happiness matters the same amount as theirs. When it becomes hard to remember that you did the right thing, think back to everything I just said." Mitchel gets up and walks over to his suitcase, leaving me to think about what he had just told me. He was right. I take a breath and calm down as my emotions were all worked up from my conversation with Mitchel.

"Do you..." I stop for a moment. Mitchel looks at me with a curious look. He raises an eyebrow at me. "Do you want to be together?" I ask, afraid to know the answer. Mitchel sets a shirt he had in his hand down on the bed. He walks back to me and extends his hand out for me to take. I hesitantly placed my hand in his. I get up from the bed, and we stand face to face once again.

"Why do you think we're here?" He asks, although I knew the answer.

"You have to break up with Lily," I tell Mitchel with a stern look. I looked down at the ground as I felt embarrassed by Mitchel's earnest gaze. I hated how awkward he could make me feel. It was a good feeling, but it lasted a bit too long for my liking.

"I already did," Mitchel's voice fills the room after a few seconds of weird silence. I look back up and smile. "Elijah had told her to break things off with me. He told her he wouldn't blackmail her as he originally threatened. We spoke on the phone and said our goodbyes. It sounds a lot more dramatic than it was. I'm a single man. I'm all yours." 

I smile.