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Nyairi.
3 months later
Looking in the mirror i see somebody, it's not Nyairi well not the old insecure Nyairi.
Lately i really been taking the time to learn to love myself, the physical things tho
I'm not fully okay with myself if that makes sense. I've came to peace with the way i look, i love it well i'm getting to that point and it feels good
Only thing i'm not okay with is my mind, im
not okay at all but i've been trying to make improvementsEating wise it's been a little better but when i get into them moods and i feel like shutting down i end up having a hard time trying to eat
Me and daddy's relationship isn't perfect, he don't trust me
We talked it out kinda but i feel like it was forced because he didn't want Satouri mad at him anymore
Satouri is over daddy and his shit i could tell but she's not leaving. I don't know why but she's not
Jae been having it hard lately. His dad got into a accident and passed but that landed Jae in the system, it didn't last long cause Satouri got him asap
The process wasn't that long
But his mom been asking to see him and he doesn't know if he wants to see her or not
All that also comes with him ignoring me
Idk why he always choose to ignore me like it's gone fix anything
School been ight. Physically of course i'm there but mentally i'm all over the place
Grades kinda slipping, 3 c's and 2 b's
My literature teacher even called daddy but he didn't say anything to me about it .. Satouri did
She just asked me was i okay and i told her no
I'm not gonna lie especially to Satouri
She checks on me a lot but i don't say much simply because idk what to say
Not even a few days ago Jae told me he was talking to somebody
It hurt like bad. But i did kinda tell him i wasn't looking for no relationship, i can't necessarily be mad because he told me straight up
He doesn't kiss me no more so it must be serious cause wth
Satouri been in a really bad mood lately like it's crazy. She's hardly talking to anybody, she snapped on daddy like 3 times this week, she ain't cooking everyday like she always is
She won't even tell me what's wrong
Half the time she seems gone, like she's here but mentally she's not
With Jae ignoring me, Satouri being distant from the whole fucking world, and daddy being himself i been lonely and bored asl
"Jae" i said knocking on his bedroom door
Ngl i need my bestie right now
He opened the door and i seen he had on his pajama pants and no shirt
"What"? he asked
"Wyd"? i asked
"I'm on the phone what you want"?
He gave me that 'you better not start fucking crying' look
"Aye imma call you back" he said
"Okay"
That's a fucking girl. It's a fucking girl. Why it's a fucking girl. WHO TF IS THAT GIRL.