Heart of stone

Consequenses

⚠️ MASSIVE SELF HARM WARNING! (Detailed)

Nat woke up first that morning, she was feeling pretty little but knew that Wanda would have a huge hangover. So, she tried to hide it. She had pushed her little side for years, what would one day do?

Turns out, a lot. The day started off okay. She was doing pretty good until about midday. She really wanted to have mamas milk and go for a nap but Wanda was too busy throwing up her guts from the night before.

Nat tried so hard to push any negative feelings down but... she ended up back in the bathroom, her mind getting the best of her again.

Do it.
You deserve it.
Your so stupid.
Your a weak little, nobody wants you.
Wanda tried to drink her feelings away, why else would she have ignored you all day?
WEAK!
LITTLE!
BABY!

Nat pushed the blade across her arm leaving Scarlet stains over herself. She relaxes again and realised how much she missed the feeling of this, it gave her a rush nothing else did. No matter how many times she held ice cubes until her hand cramped, drew on her wrist with red pen, nothing worked for her.

She cut again, and again, until the bad feeling was gone and her arm was dripping red. She carefully cleaned up before going back out to everyone. Thor and Bruce were slightly hungover but not too badly, Steve, Tony and Clint were pretty bad, Nat was fine and Wanda was... terrible.

Nat sat down and watched whatever tv show they were watching, she was mostly zoning out and thinking of being little with her mama.

After a little bit she realised she was gonna slip. She got up carefully and said "I'm gonna go check on m- Wanda." She said her face burning  from slipping up. Her name was WANDA! Not mama.

She went into Wanda's room and saw her laying in bed reading a book with a mug of steaming tea. "Hey babygirl!" She said in a happy tone, it made Nat want to slip even more. "How are you feeling?" Nat asked quickly. "I'm actually feeling better! Just don't tell the boys that, they're being very kind and bringing me tea."

Nat smiled before her eyes filled with tears and she cuddled into Wanda. "Hey, it's okay. What's wrong?" She asked but all Nat could say was "mama..." her voice so quiet and shy.

Wanda could tell that Nat had been putting of slipping for a long time because she was really deep in headspace. "It's okay babygirl, mamas here." Nat looked up at wanda with the most innocent eyes as a tear rolled down her cheek.

Wanda quickly wiped it away with the pad of her thumb before picking her baby up and cuddling her. Nat lay her head on Wanda's chest as they lay down together, enjoying every second in her mamas arms.

She had forgotten about her arms. Even though she had wrapped them and cleaned up properly, they still stung. With her hoodie covering up her damaged arms Wanda was still oblivious, but Nat knew it was only a matter of time until she found out.

They cuddled for hours, Nat too deep in headspace to really understand what was going on, she was just happy to be with her mama. Wanda was watching her baby whilst reading, enjoying the quiet time and cute baby on top of her.

It was only a small knock on the door that brought them both back to reality. "Wanda?" Clint's voice echoed through her room. "Yeah? Come in..." she said sounding slightly worried. "Hey can I... oh... okay umm... we need to talk about Nat."

Wanda's heart dropped and she nodded. "Is it urgent?" She asked and Clint looked at any and then back at Wanda and nodded. "Okay... im just gonna put her with Steve, he's a caregiver, right?" Clint nodded, confirming that Steve's results were in fact caregiver. and let Wanda put Nat with Steve, again, Nat was really deep in headspace and didn't really understand what was going on. Steve happily accepted taking care of Nat and enjoyed looking after her, he liked seeing his friend happy and carefree again.

Wanda quickly made her way back to Clint, worried about what he wanted to talk to her about. "Sorry, what's up with Nat?" She asked and Clint took a deep breath before shaking his head. "Come and look..."

He lead her to Nat's bathroom, and Wanda was very confused until he opened Nat's drawer and they both saw a few drops of blood next to an oddly clean blade. Next to the clean blade there was a tube of some sort of Russian cream, it was opened and it had a few bloody fingerprints and blood drops left on it.

"Oh god... you don't think she..." Wanda asked and Clint looked at her worried and nodded. She rushed back to her baby and gently took her from Steve, her worry radiating off of her. "Wanda what's wrong?" Steve asked as she rushed out the room, not answering him.

"It's okay, she just needs to check something." Steve nodded but didn't seem convinced. "Don't worry about it steve, they're okay." Steve nodded again still not convinced, but let it go. He knew Wanda wouldn't hurt Nat, not purposely, and that Nat was safe with her.

Wanda was back in her room with Nat lying on the bed. She gently changed Nat into a diaper and some black leggings, she had to take a deep breath before taking her hoodie off. As soon as she did her eyes filled with tears. "Oh baby girl... why didn't you come to me..." she whispered, knowing her baby couldn't understand her.

She didn't want to take the bandages off, she didn't want to see her baby in pain. But she knew that she needed to check they were okay. Did she do this in headspace? Why did she do it? Why didn't she come to her mama? Wanda didn't know, but took another deep breath before deciding to take the bandages off to see the damage.

She carefully unwrapped Nat's wrists and saw the many cuts across her arm. A few tears rolled down her cheeks, this would explain the really deep headspace. She saw that they were all taken care of and clean, she probably wasn't in headspace. That assured Wanda, but did it? She knew what she was doing, it wasn't an accident.

She didn't know why Nat didn't come to her, but she didn't want to agitate her while she was in headspace. Something was definitely going on and knew Nat now liked being little, it was comfort to her. So, she decided to just let Nat be little. Let her have comfort before asking her about it. She knew she would need big Nat. Maybe tomorrow...

She carefully changed Nat into a short sleeve white snap crotch onesie with her leggings over the top, letting her cuts air out. She knew it would help them heal in the long run. She picked her baby up and bounced her around a little bit before she started to whine. "What's wrong babygirl? Tell mama what's wrong..."

"Mama..." Nat whined and started pulling at Wanda's shirt. "Baby can you use your words and tell me what you want please?" Wanda tried before realising. "Oh my babygirl, you want mama milk?" She asked and Nat kicked her legs slightly and tried to pull Wanda's shirt down again.

"Okay baby one minute..." she carefully laid down with Nat across her, pillows either side of them for comfort. Wanda undid her bra and pulled off her shirt. Nat was quick to latch on and immediately started suckling, calming herself down.

Wanda felt calm during this time too, it was a weird feeling of calmness. She just watched her baby nurse and gently stroked her hair out of her face. Nat kept her eyes closed as she nursed, one hand on the boob she was drinking from, the other across Wanda's chest possessively.

They both just stayed in silence, the only noise being Nat suckling. Both of them content in the moment, forgetting about everything and loving each other's company.