Streetlife

44 - Frances, Jr's Story

Frank Jr POV

As I lay wide awake the Tylenol they keep giving me does nothing. Nothing at all as I'm too scared to fall asleep. I didn't know where the hell Warbucks was as I hadn't seen him in hours, but I could only think he was most likely either lurking around or somewhere messing with my baby sis.

I knew that messing with Stef was his reason for sticking me in rehab and playing nice guy which he wasn't. The only thing I wanted to do was tell my sister but I didn't know how I was going to do that. I had no clue and I wanted to get her the hell out of here but I couldn't do that while being an addict or if I wanted her and I to live! Shit. I'm such a damn pussy.

I'm shaking at this point, shaking like crazy because there was nothing I could do and I was going through some withdrawals as I squeeze my eyes shut and try so hard to calm down but my heart was racing like crazy. If only I could see Julius for he was the one who understood where my brain was, and he knew my story. Most of it anyway, and maybe if I saw him, I'd feel better, but I wasn't so sure. Hell, it was worth a try and I just wanted him to hold me and lay beside me.

But what in the heck did I expect? I was foolish for allowing my naive and innocent baby sister to come to New York City, a place she had no business being, ever. I see now just how wild she really has become and much more developed than the last time I saw her when she was just 14.

Stef always had a mouth on her but it had grown worse and I also knew that she wanted to be noticed by men, and these issues were from the short leash my parents had on her as well as most likely how verbally abusive my father could be and distant. He never did show either of us any affection and if he did show attention it was never for a good reason.

Julius had said he thought she had Daddy issues, and it was clear as day to me now when I saw how she looked at Warbucks...enough to make me lose my appetite too. This was all my fault. I should never have gotten involved with this man...ever! I know I shouldn't have, and hot tears scald my eyelids as I begin to cry quietly.

Shit. There was just nothing I could do about it because well, I had made the awful choice to get involved with him for at the time I was desperate. Desperate for money and when I had left my parents home five years ago for New York City I was homeless for six months. It might have been closer to year but I honestly can't remember since I had been shooting up so damn much during that time that it fried my brain and wiped most of my memory.

I should have known then and there that New York City was not the pIace for me because it seemed my drug habit had gotten even worse. Yeah, I struggled with drugs my entire life but I never had stoop so low to hook my body out to get a taste of it. My dreams of going to school to become a fashion designer all went out the window and my drug issue became worse and worse especially once I discovered heroin.

I wasn't sure why I thought I'd be different in New York City and feel as if I'd get my life on track. I had done none of that and hooking alone was VERY dangerous, and I had almost gotten killed until by pure luck I ran into Julius on the street one night when I was so low and offered to suck his dick. I don't even know why he took me to his place knowing what I was and knowing that I could possibly be someone that would steal from him or worse.

I guess he felt bad and I never blamed him for getting me involved with Warbucks...ever. Julius had cleaned me up, detoxed me and had been my saving grace at the time. He also knew something NO one did at the time. He knew I was trans and still loved me.

But I needed money because I still had dreams of being a fashion designer and was rather excited when he told me he had the same dreams and showed me his work. It inspired me to do better and I found myself inquiring about what he did to make his money for his designs and photography for he told me he wasn't making a living off of that just yet.