Streetlife

47 - Talk To Me

STEF POV

As I run into St. Lukes after grabbing Michael an Italian sub from a nearby deli, I felt kinda bad for flaking out on him last night when I promised to bring him dinner. It really wasn't something I'd do, and I really had every intention of coming back last night. But I guess I was more fucking tired then I led on and after the relaxing bath with Callie, smoking some weed, fucking and hearing her sing and play some of her music on her guitar I didn't really wanna fucking leave.

Sure I could have skipped the whole thing with that bitch, Lena and Julius who was no fucking better, but chilling with Cals I wouldn't have traded for she was a sweetheart which is why I gave her money for missing her shift...which of course, she wouldn't take. So I handed Lena that damn money myself.

As I walk inside the hospital towards my brother's room, I am hoping he is feeling better. He had damn sure looked like shit, and it worried me more then I let on. I didn't wanna come off as some fucking cry baby pussy as I see Warbucks sitting outside Frank's room like usual, reading a newspaper. I take a seat beside him as he turns to look at me and smiles.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I fucking flaked out and didn't..."

He stops me and places his hand on top of mine. "No need to apologize, sweetheart. You needed the rest. Do you feel better?"

"I do, thank you. Still it was fucking rude of me and I promised to bring you dinner." I frown as his smile widens.

"Listen you needed some sleep, a real bed, and a shower. I'm glad you got that. I went home and showered myself. Got some shut-eye, then got up to come right over here and make sure your brother was okay."

"Yeah?" I grin now as I am touched with how he is caring care of Frank. It really means the world to me, and he doesn't seem like this cruel person even if I had my suspicions he may have smacked Callie and somehow made my brother fear him.

"I did."

"I can tell. I smell your aftershave." I smile as he returns it and I hand him the sandwich. "But I know it's not dinner, but I brought you lunch. An Italian sub."

"Thank you." He winks at me as I smile right back and jump to my feet.

"I'm gonna check on Frank."

"I'll be right here, sweetheart."

I meet his eyes as he winks at me, and my heart races. Quickly walking into Frank's room, I see that he is awake and staring out the window, and I notice that his lunch is still on the tray, untouched.

I quickly move to sit beside him as he turns to look at me and smiles weakly. "Hey, baby sis. I missed you."

"Ya? It's only been a few hours," I grab his hand and hold it as he squeezes mine back.

"Ya, but I couldn't sleep much last night. I mean, I feel like shit, and they've given me Tylenol and some stuff I don't know what to help me with my tremors and detox."

"I'm glad. It seems this hospital cares a lot. But ummm, how's...how are you really feeling?" I try to dig deeper as he lays his head back on his pillow and sighs. "I see you haven't touched your lunch. Not hungry?"

"Ehhh, I hate hospital food."

"I'm worried about you, big brother," I say as he won't look at me. "I really am. I went home to shower and I fell asleep, but I've been really worried. I'm really glad you're going to rehab and stuff baby."

"I'm ok baby sis. I'll be even better in a couple days. Just gotta heal. Is everything ok with you? Are you, are you lonely at the apartment?"

"Oh nah. I've been hanging out in the city and with Callie."

"Oh, Callie?" He looks surprised.

"Yeah, she's actually cool. So, not all your friends suck." I laugh as he shakes his head laughing and smiling at me.

"You're a trip, baby sis. You really are."

"Yeah so I've been told. Francis...I just want you to be ok. I know I'm fucking brash and not very censored but I'm not a little girl. Why don't you talk to me? You don't gotta keep shit from me. Listen, I know about the street hormones honey."

He looks right at me and closes his eyes as I grab his hand and rub it. I knew my brother was a complete mess, and maybe I had been in denial about how much of a mess he really was in. But I didn't care if he was gay or straight or whatever. I just wanted him ok and happy.

"It's ok love. But, what are you trying to do to yourself? I don't judge. Cross my heart," I squeeze his hand as he slowly looks my way. "But that stuff is dangerous, honey."

"I didn't know, Stef. Lately I...I've been taking anything to get high." He says as I'm not sure if I believe him for he doesn't have a good track record in terms of telling me the truth lately. At all and it made me fucking nuts.

I just didn't get why he felt the need to constantly lie to me and if he had always been like this. From what I remember he hadn't been so damm fucking secretive, he was much more easy going, nothing like he is now. At all.  "I took anything I could get my hands on. I didn't check what it was. I swear it."

"Yeah. Listen, um, I'll be back for dinner, ok? And I'll bring you something. We are gonna check out apartments now."

"Ok. Um...sounds good." He doesn't look at me as I don't know what to do for once again his face says it all but nothing and it's like pulling teeth. But I don't want to push him right now, which seemed to be my fucking motto lately.

"I love you, Frank."

"I love you too, baby sis."

Getting off the bed, I straighten the blanket over him as he quickly grabs my hand, and I look at him concerned.

"Stef, please be careful," he says with fear in his eyes, and it makes me want to scream. What is he so afraid of? What?

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"It's just. I know you don't want no one telling you what to do and stuff but please. Just...keep your eyes open and...and your ears too," he blurts out as I look at him thoroughly confused at what he's trying to imply. He had been talking in fucking code since I got off the damn bus a few weeks ago and still was.

"You think I can't handle myself in this city? I have an expert taking me around, okay? Michael is a good man. He wants to make things right for not protecting you from getting mugged and stuff. Me and him had a talk and all. Don't worry, okay?" I squeeze his hand as I smile and he smiles back weakly, and I lean in to kiss his cheek before leaving his room hoping and praying that rehab would help Frank start to tell the truth to himself as well as others.

Seeing that his brain is so fried, I read that he's not thinking straight and I know that drug addicts lie a lot. That has to be why he's acting so erratically and why I can't get much out of him. Or was there more I just wasn't fucking seeing? There had to be.

Closing his door behind me Warbucks walks up to me and grabs my hand as he must notice the look of worry on my face.

"All ok?"

"Yeah he's tired. So he's gonna get some rest."

"That's good.He should rest up tomorrow will be a big day for him. A good one but big. Are you ok?"

"Yeah." I whisper looking at the ground as I feel Micheal move closer to me and I look back into his warm eyes. "He's just not how I remember him. He use to be care free and alive and not so damm anxious, and nervous.  It's like he's scared of fucking everything. I don't know."

"Drugs, and addiction can do that. Once he's clean he will be the brother you remember."

"I don't know. There's more to it I feel. I don't maybe that's my lack of sleep." I shrug as he softly smiles. "You think I'm crazy?"

"NO. You just love your brother. Which I get. He'll be ok.  But, remember you take care of yourself too. That's an order."

"Yes BOSS." I tease as he smiles at me.

"Ahh you wish!"

"Ha!.No, you wish baby." I wink and walk off as I see him shaking his head and laughing for I guess I used humor, sex and weed to deal with hard situations and this was definitely one of them.