After life: A Supernatural Fanfiction

Twenty-eight

Dean's POV
Weeks pass with hunting, research and drinking. A lot of drinking. Almost every night since Eve left, well no, since I sent her away, my best friend is a bottle of whiskey. Nearly every day, Sam tells me to stop, but I can't. Eve was only here with us for a few weeks, but because she was the first woman ever living here, a lot reminds me of her. I even moved to another room in the bunker.
I feel miserable and nothing Sam and Eileen do can change that. Maybe I just made the biggest mistake of my life the morning I pushed her away. But at least I know she is safe.
Tonight we hunted down a nest of vampires. Coming back home, I search for another bottle of whiskey but can't find any.
While I roam through the bar, Eileen comes up and says:" Sam told me to throw the alcohol away."
I stop and look at her:" Why would he do that?"
"Because," Sammy's voice appears and he steps inside the room," if you don't stop, you will drink yourself to death."
"So what?" I reply," then I could..." but I stop talking because I see how Sam looks at me. He knows what I was about to say. It's not the first time this thought has occurred to me.
"Dean, we need you. I need you. Not only as a hunter. You are my brother."
I nod:" Yeah, yeah, I know." and I pass him.
"Where do you want to go?"
"Buying more booze." and I wave behind me.
I drive into town, buying some stuff. Not only whiskey but dinner.
When I come home again, Sam and Eileen are waiting for me in the main hall.
I step down the stairs and say:" Please don't tell me this is going to be an intervention."
Sam grins for a second but nods:" Somehow."
I approach them, putting the bags on the table.
"I made dinner," I say, smiling, hoping to ease the tension, but still, they both have stern looks on their faces. "What now? Someone died?"
Sam shakes his head:" No. Dean, sit down."
I grab the next chair and cross my arms over my chest:" What?"
Sam hesitates, changes a glance with Eileen, but remains silent.
"Well, then..." and I pull out my favorite bottle and want to open it, but Eileen says quickly:" We know where Eve is."
The room is so silent, you could hear a pin drop. It takes me a second or two to process her words.
"Sorry, what?" I ask," she is in heaven, where else should she be?"
Eileen shakes her head, a soft smile on her face:" No, she isn't."
I glance over to Sam, but he avoids looking back at me.
"Wait, wait, wait... What?" I sit up straight, waving my hands around," what do you mean exactly?"
Then, quietly, Sam answers:" I was in touch with her the whole time."
"You have to be kidding me."
"No. I had a feeling she didn't vanish from the earth. I just followed my guts. And I was right."
I look at him, a mixed feeling in my chest—anger and excitement. At the moment, I'm not sure which emotion is more significant.
"How dare you, keeping that a secret from me." I shoot up from my place." You saw me suffering the whole time and it didn't even occur to you a tiny little bit to tell me?" I shout at him, being aware I'm not fair all the way.
Sam shoots up from his chair now too, yelling back at me:" You were the one who sent her away, remember, Dean? You, not me."
Desperate, I rub my fingers through my hair, insecure about what to do or say next.
"I know," I answer by singing small," I know."
"Sorry, what?" Sam looks at me in disbelief," I thought I had to fight you."
"No." I say," No." and my voice is getting lower. "I can't fight right now." I fall back to the chair, wiping over my face. "Where is she?"
"She is at Jody's," Eileen answers calmly.
"Of course she is." I sigh and chuckle. The anger slowly fades and an enormous feeling of relief drags from my head to my toes. "She liked being there."
Sam sits down again:" I contacted Jody after Eve vanished from here and she was already there. I guess Eve didn't know where to go and Jody is the only other human she knows."
"That's how you got all the information about the ark, right? Because Eve told you? She is doing her own research?"
"Yes, she told me Claire helps her a lot. They even went hunting together." Sam replies carefully, knowing what I would think about it.
"I gotta go." I stand up again, grabbing my jacket.
"What, but..." Sam starts and I turn around:" No, Sam, I will not sit here, knowing she is still on earth."
"Dean, I'm just not sure if it's a good idea to just appear at her door after what you have done. Jody told me how miserable Eve was the first weeks."
"Don't worry, I know. Believe it or not, I felt the same way," Sam shoots me a look, surprised about my sudden confession," just dome a favor and tell Jody I'm coming, but she should keep it to herself."
"I'm not sure Jody is on your site in this." Sam answers sternly," you kicked Eve out and you know Jody."
"Yeah, that doesn't mean she can't keep it to herself for one day."
Sam nods:" Ok, I will try but can't make any promises."
"Do your best." I just answer and head towards the garage.
First I drive to a supermarket, I want something to buy.
I need to be there as fast as possible, that's why I speed up my baby.
I distract myself with loud music and food. Sometimes I take a look at the seat next to me. The paper I bought is still blank, but I have enough time to consider what to write down. The idea just hit me to write down something for her. Maybe it's easier that way for her and me. She is not that kind of person, well, angel, who would push me away, but I think Eve will like the gesture.
I shake my head over myself. Have I ever thought about writing a letter ever before in my life? Definitely not. Did she change me? I'm not sure. Well, yes, she did in a way, but maybe this more soft side was there all the time, I just needed someone to tease it out. When I was with Lisa, I behaved differently too, but never even considered writing down any feelings, not to mention talking about them.
Thinking about that and more, I drive the whole day and before the sunset, I stop and start to write. Unexpectedly, I have an easy time finding the right words. I read it repeatedly and satisfied I put the letter in the envelope.
Suddenly it's like a heavy burden is put away from my shoulders and I recognize how tired I am. I decide to sleep the night and get in the back seat and close my eyes.
With the sun rising, I get back to driving and shortly before lunchtime, I arrive at Jody's.
I park behind the hedge and observe the house. Thank God it's winter, I can watch right through it. I see the house is decorated with Christmas lights. Jody even has lights in the garden. Tiny reindeers and a Santa sled are lighted in the middle of the grass.
The lights inside are switched on so I can recognize Jody and Claire. I am going to wait till they sit down, so I can place the letter. Then I see a movement in the living room. Eve just stood up. Finally, getting a glance at her makes my pulse rise and I feel a lump in my throat. Eve leaves the room and joins the others. I can see them laughing. I'm glad she is happy. A fear just rushes through me. What when she is truly happy there and here I come and ruin it? But I just can't make a turn right now. I need to try it. I want to be the one to make her happy.
Slowly I get out and shut the door quietly. I approach the front door and slide the envelope under it. I rush back to the car and all I can do now is wait.
Maybe half an hour later, I can see them getting up. I guess they are cleaning the table. I hope someone will pass the front door soon.
To my luck, just minutes later, the front door opens. Eve peers out, the letter in her hand. Her hair is pulled up and a few streaks frame her face. She steps out, she is pressing the oversize cardigan she is wearing tight. Eve sits down on the bench on Jody's porch. She opens the letter and starts to read. I gulp hard, waiting for her reaction. I see her wiping her face when she folds the letter after reading it. She doesn't stand up. She just looks in the distance. I take the chance and get out of the car. I make my way around the hedge, slowly walking the short path to Jody's front door. Halfway through, she spots me. Gradually, she stands up.