𝗦𝗢𝗨𝗞𝗢𝗞𝗨 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗧𝗦

In All Seriousness

Dazai-typical s*icide attempts, mental breakdowns, mentions of SH and a scene of SH please do not continue if sensetive to any of these topics!

He did it again.

Dazai did it again.

They didn't care.

They should care.

They were his friends, right?

.
.
.
.

He woke up to an unsteady knocking on his door.
He knew that sound from anywhere,
He knew why that sound was there.

Chuuya hugged Dazai tighter, whispering all those sweet words into his ear, running his hands in his hair, kissing him frequently on the face, forehead, and hair.Dazai cried quietly in his arms, every time Chuuya did this with Dazai, it always hurt more than the last.

Dazai tried to kill himself, again. This was the second serious attempt this month, what the hell was causing this to happen? Of course, the agency should know, they should.

He used cutting as the method, It felt like Chuuya's heart dropped to his heart. His arms were bleeding onto the ground.

"I'm sorry Chuuya. I keep troubling you, and—"
Chuuya told him it was fine, saying that it was just, absolutely fine. The pain in his chest eased when Dazai started crying less and less. At least he could help him in these moments, he felt horrible for not being in those four years. His best friend died and everything went to shit, Dazai made so many serious attempts during that time— The only person to help him through was himself.

Dazai stopped shaking, his face was buried in Chuuya's chest, all crying and tears have stopped. Dazai was tired— exhausted. Chuuya comforted the brunette with more whispers and the things he loved about him, and when he fell asleep, Chuuya made dreams for him.

"You would go to the bar with Ango and Odasaku, order some whiskey and hear Ango order tomato juice, you and Sakunosuke would laugh and tease him about it, and Ango would start going on and on about how horrible drinking whiskey was and you two would just ignore him. The bartender would laugh, all of you would laugh."

He could hear Dazai's breath hitch, feel the way his chest would rise, and then go down again. He could feel the other's heart beating, it was the best sound in the world, hearing his heartbeat. He'd have to ask the agency about Dazai, later maybe, he has no intention to move away from Dazai at the moment. He smiled and he continue brushing his hand in the brunette's hair.

When Dazai comes to visit Chuuya, (which is very often, honestly he should just move in.) He would dine with him and take a shower, when he visits Chuuya, it's bound that he was gonna eat and be locked away in warm arms and blankets, after a nice hot bath and a very hot meal.

When they were eighteen, Chuuya was the one who had to wrestle those knives, and guns, and razorblades, and ropes and so many more away from Dazai. He was the one that made sure he was eating healthy, well never healthy— just stay eating. He made sure Dazai had good hygiene. Dazai could never eat a full plate, he would always eat just a little bit of it.

At least these days, Dazai would eat at least half of the food, he would always say, "It's because Chuuya is so bad at cooking!" as a joke, but Chuuya knew why he didn't eat, he knew him better than anybody else.