𝗦𝗢𝗨𝗞𝗢𝗞𝗨 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗧𝗦

Port Mafia Executive, Chibi Nakahara!

It was a normal day. Dazai was fooling around and throwing paper airplanes around the office— mainly targetting Kunikida and Atsushi— while making a horrible sound he claimed was 'whistling'. "If you would whistling the sound of a ventilator atttached to a brain dead person, yeah." Ranpo had chirped.

He was quickly made fun of by Ranpo and Yosano for not being able to whistle.

The agency was peaceful and familiar, it might not have been quiet, per say, but it was peaceful nonetheless.

That is when—

"The Port Mafia executive Kouyou-san is here." Naomi announces, before adding a 'small' "With a child."

Dazai chokes on his failure of a whistle.

"With a child?!" He knows all about the Port Mafia harboring children and welcoming them into their ranks— Because the idea of children is simply not true. Especially when a darkness is already housed inside of their small, developing ribs. They never brought the children into the ADA though! ...Without the children escaping them, of course.

"Yes." Naomi nods, smiling at him like he's just answered the million dollar question.

He hears light footsteps, eyes landing on Kouyou.

Yosano stares, Ranpo laughs, Kunikida bows respectfully and Atsushi shrinks in on himself. Her scarlet hair brought down instead of being held up, a casual yet striking outfit instead of her normal go-to kimono— She has her umbrella and a child beside her.

"Hello." She smiles, not even trying yet being as graceful as ever with every breath she takes.

He'll make fun of Yosano later, after solving this case. "May I speak with Dazai-kun privately?" Kunikida bobs his head and leads them to another room, quietly leaving after they enter.

"Did you...?" Dazai trails off, pointing at the child with a wince. If he's wrong, he'll most likely be shredded to death, painfully and brutally—

"Of course not!" Kouyou snaps, glaring at him. "This is Chuuya, he's been hit with a time-based ability that's regressed his age and I've brought him here for you to nullify the ability." She steps to the side slightly, revealing more of the small child.

Dazai is thrown into howling laughter that almost brings him to tears.

"Wha— Ha—" He practically folds in half laughing so hard that his stomach threatens to cramp, his howling laughter turns into obnoxious wheezing that's painful to listen to after a while.

Chuuya glares at him, big cerulean button eyes digging into his soul and an upset frown carved onto his face. "Fuck you." He says, Kouyou just sighs. "Normally I would reprimand such vulgar language, but even I would say you deserve every profanity, exclamation and insult this little one can provide." The aforementioned 'little one' shouts out a loud 'Hah?' in protest, "I'm not little! I'm only nine years old, I'm average for my height and I'm still growing!"

"You're a hundred and fifteen centimeters tall, that's below average for a nine year old, so hold your tongue especially when talking to me, boy."

Chuuya humphs and bites the inside of his cheeks, turning red.

Dazai giggles, "I assume he doesn't have his memories?" Kouyou nods, "Yes but that doesn't matter since you'll be nullifying the ability anyhow. The skill user is in the Port Mafia's hold and he's already coughed up that the ability wears off after atleast a day but this way is much more time efficient."

"Look, all I know is that I was at least an adult that was hit by an ability and I got younger, I don't know who you are—" He shoots Dazai a glare that could kill— "And frankly I don't give a shit. So just fucking 'nullify' the skill already you sad piece of mucky shit!"

Kunikida gawks at the obscene language used, Yosano snorts and Ranpo outright giggles. Kouyou doesn't show any hint of being affected but one would see she was smiling the slightest bit if they looked hard enough. Dazai stares at the youth in silent disbelief, the way that the boy uses such vulgar language...

"Mm, learned that from The Sheep, huh? Fine." Dazai shrugs, moving closer to the redhead. The redhead in question moves with him with a furious frown, getting even angrier when Dazai squats down to meet him face-to-face. As a maure nine year-old, Chuuya very maturely winds his arm back and punches Dazai in the face.

He falls down on the floor with his ass withstounding most of the impact, but the most damage he was dealt with is coming from the loud howls of laughter behind him.

"Oh, Chuuya wasn't nullified. How unfortunate." Kouyou says, sighing. "Whaaa, Chuuya is such a mean brute! Even when he was younger~ Inflicting pain upon others with your fist can damage your bones and even affect the rest of your body, so you won't grow taller, did you know that?"

He hears the scribbling of a pen on paper and Chuuya is obviously one thin string away from snapping and throwing a stapoer in Dazai's eye. "Oi, shut the fuck up. Everyone knows that's a lie."

The snapping of a pen behind him brings much satisfaction to Dazai.

"This is truly very unfortunate. I gave Chuuya an important task today, but it seems that I have to do it now..." She momentarily grieves, putting her hand on her chin. "I should give him over to another person...No, but the Mafia is too dangerous...The members of the Black Lizard have an important job... Mori? No, absolutely not." She takes her hand off, placing it on Chuuya's shoulder instead.

"I've decided." She announces, looking at Dazai with disdain in her eyes.

"You will take care of him."

""What?!"" The two shout in unison, "You might as well feed me to the wolves—"

"That's a funny way of saying you're not thinking things through, Kouyou-san—"

"Oi, are ya sayin' I'm unpleasant or some—"

"Ugh, you are terrible, absolutely terrible—

"—Thing because you're totally worse than me!"

"Boys!" Kouyou scolds, "This is exactly how it went when you were both fifteen. Just because