12-22-21
I know you're on your way out
Out on us and out on me
I could never be what you wanted me to be
I tried and tried to tell myself not to fall
Cause I knew you'd break my heart
I knew I'd never be good enough the moment you started saying shit
Shit like you just might have to find another girl to heely down the street with
That our friend was cooler than me just because he has heelys
That I'm being a baby for being afraid to try
I knew you'd leave the second you said that if you ever did cheat on me
What I don't know can't hurt me
The more you said it the more insecure I became
The more you pressured me the hurt I felt
You have no idea the demons in my mind that scream at me that I will never be enough
That no one will ever truly want me
That all I'll ever be good enough for is people sexual satisfaction
For people to use and abuse and release their sexual tension upon
Because I'm a slut who will let you do what you want to me
Just so I can make you happy and maybe keep you in my life for a little bit longer
To have you as my own for just a little while
To make myself try to forget the fact that this won't last
No one ever will
No one ever will
So use me Draven
Use me to release your desires upon
Use me for whatever you want
I know in your head you see her instead
I know you'd rather it was her than me
Cause she can heely and she's so pretty
But mainly she can live that heely life
And maybe she's more lenient about you doing drugs and stuff that will fuck your mind up
Maybe she'll join in with you
But mainly she can live that heely life
So cheat on me although you say you won't
And I want to believe but inside I'm broke
You say her name in such a way I know you think about her everyday
And she can live that heely way
You tell me about the things she does more than any other one
So wear the bracelet she gave you
Even though you know I don't like it
Keep the paper boat she stapled
I'm pretty sure you know how I feel
Use me and abuse me and release into me
And I"ll try to keep pretending that I'm the one on your mind even though I know you'll never truly be mine
- I wrote this when I was afraid my so had feelings for another girl. I soon realized afterwards that this wasn't the case after talking to them about it. But, here it is nonetheless.
