2-20-24
My heart is hurting
My stomach is churning
The pictures I've found
The things that you've said
Nothing is easing the pain
I feel as though it would be easier if you had just cheated
This feels like cheating
It's the fact that the pictures look like they were meant for me
But I never got them
It's the fact she didn't ask for them
You just sent them
It's the fact she sent back
And you liked them
It's the fact that she said you were "looking good"
It's the fact you said "🥰 You tooooo!"
It's the fact that there's deleted messages before the first picture
It's the fact I'll never know if there was more than those two you sent
The two I saw
The two that are fucking me over
It's the fact that I can't feel
I know you touching me
But I don't feel it
It's the fact that my vision is hazy
Yet I've done no drugs
It's the fact that I'm shivering
Yet I don't feel cold
It's the fact that I will never feel like I am enough
I thought I was enough
And I know you said you didn't mean anything by it
But the pictures look like they should've been mine
I wouldn't care if they had been normal
If they hadn't been somewhat provocative
If you hadn't said "You tooooo!"
If you hadn't sent them in the first place
My heart is hurting
My stomach is churning
My vision is hazy
Yet I feel nothing
It's the fact that I still love you more than anything
It's the fact you could stab me in the heart and with my dying breath I'd tell you I love you