3-29-22
Here I am again
Stuck in the same old rut
Empty as fuck
All alone
With nowhere to go
I'm lost and I'm sad
And honestly
It fukin sucks
I told them how I was feeling
That I wasn't doing alright
Did they care?
No all they said was
"I just don't get why your stressed"
Oh you don't get it?
Lemme explain it from my side
I'm 18
Slowly dying inside
From the stress I feel day and night
Have to go in every single day
They don't care that it's my day for me
Missed a whole month of school
To be subways bitch
Running a store that's falling down
Have to come in to do my employees jobs
Cause my opener can't open
And for some reason
Every needs their shifts covered
So I'll work open to closes
Often alone
Watching myself as I turn into someone I don't know
I guess I'm to nice cause I always say yes
I'll do what they ask
But I'm sick of it
No longer will I sit idly by
And them tell me what I have to do and when
I'm fukin sick of it
They told me they'd move me back
To my old position
Guess that was a lie
Like everything else
So I'll sit by myself
Lost in my thoughts
Wondering how the fuck
I'm supposed to go on
My energy is draining
I'm sick all the time
My mental state is falling
I'm losing my mind
The sleep I get
Is interrupted often times
By calls from my boss
Saying I have to go in
Cause guess what
My fukin opener didn't open again
So it's up to me to go and fix it
Cause it's my store and my issue
I didn't expect this
They told me I'd be fine
I wouldn't open a lot
What a big lie that was
Cause I open the most
Tell me they need someone here because my opener is leaving
Pieces of shit if they think I'm opening
So I'll wait another week maybe just a few days
We'll see if they can get their shit together
Before I quit in the worst possible way
So here I sit
Feeling empty again
Like I'm the piece of shit
For not being able to do this
So I'll sit and I'll think about why I can't do better
Feeling so fukin empty
Because I want to quit
